Please someone explain psychology

Sorry to hear you are having such a tough time. The psychology behind your anger is that you are being triggered by the things your husband is saying. They may be truthful but often we are hurt by things that may well be true but that we have not resolved for ourselves. I'm not sure what the comments are that he makes but when you start to feel anger take a moment to stop and consider how this makes you feel about yourself? If it bringing up feelings of fear, rejection, inadequacy, failure? This is then what you need to be managing, it might help to access for counselling if it's something you would like to work through. I would also give yourself some kindness and try to consider here that although your anger is caused by your psychological response, there are hormones at play here too which are fluctuating and will also impact your mood. It is helpful to just take a step back in these situations and consider your response to your husband before responding and if it is worth the impact on your relationship.

Toxic positivity? Is that what you mean? There’s not enough in your post to comment properly, but I think it’s understandable why you and your partner would feel bad about the situation you’ve described. And while it’s helpful to have a positive frame of mind, denying negative feelings can be harmful to your own mind and others on the receiving end.

When people touch on things which trigger emotions like anger or anxiety, it’s usually something we’re ashamed about or feel inadequate. Even if subconsciously. It’s best to work things out and think about why you feel that way, rather than act on your emotions and dismiss the truth. Also like someone mentioned, hormones really can make emotions feel inflated, much bigger than they are. Just pausing and taking some time alone helps.