Parent Self-regulation

Hello,

Any advice on how to self-regulate when you’re overwhelmed with your child? Or if you’re dealing with a tantrum how do you not lose your cool?

I only have an infant but I want to make sure I break my family’s history of abuse by being gentle with my own kid.

TIA

in our community

Feeling miserable

My relationship with my husbands the worst it has ever been. We got married last year (and had a baby) and ever since the wedding we couldn’t be so far from the couple we were before. We argue all the time, he walked out on New Year’s Day, he’s shouted at me and I’ve seen a side I don’t like (I will hold my hands up and own that I’ve not been my best self either at times). Not sure if it’s because of how up/ down things have been but I’ve got no interest in being close or intimate with him even as simple as hugs or kisses. Recently I had a minor disagreement with my mil which she totally blew up and created a false story against me. She sent horrible messages about me to my husband calling me controlling, using my past mh issues against me and being rude about my family. She’s turned all of the family against me and has said they don’t want to see anymore of me. The last few days my husband and I have argued constantly and are barely speaking. He’s said things about my way of parenting that really hurt me. I honestly feel so miserable and low and fed up of how things are. No idea what to do. Been together 4 years and I’m questioning if we are actually compatible for each other

Is being unable to do a nappy ridiculous?!

So my boy is 20 months and we don't have daycare. When I need some time to do something I have to schedule it for a day my mum is not working (she's part time and nearly 70). However she can't really have him for more than an hour or two alone. She can't do his nappies...I admit he is really hard to change now. It's like a wrestling match and if there's poop involved it can take someone having to distract him, hold the phone with dancing fruits playing etc to ensure it doesn't go anywhere!
My partner thinks it's ridiculous she can't do it but I kinda get it....
What do you guys think? Any tips!?

What can I talk to my friends about

So I’ve got amazing Gang of girl mates. We’ve known each other forever but we’re off out for some food tonight and I’m nervous.

I was the last to have a baby and he’s only 9 months old so he’s very much my life right now. I’m not back at work, baby chat is literally all I have in me. All their kids are between 5-9 years old and they are much more practiced at being out and they just have way more things happening in their lives other than just being a mum.

I know my friends don’t care but I do. The last few times I’ve met with them I’ve felt really lost in the chat, I felt like all I did was talk about bottles, feeding and bedtime routines. I left feeling really blughhh and I felt like I might have been a bit over powering because I don’t get out much or see many people while I’m still on mat leave. So when I do see people I get verbal diarrhoea and I also feel like I left not knowing anything else about the other girls, probably coz of my big off load and clearly I just dominated the conversation about my baby. Which let’s face it, is very boring.

I felt a bit embarrassed and I don’t want to do it again.

Can anyone relate or give me some tips? Other than keep my big mouth closed I don’t know what else to do 🙈

House work 😢

Hoping someone can relate.
Does anyone feel like there house is never tidy? I feel like I hoover then the floors a mess again, always piles of washing. I only have one baby! Feel like I can’t keep on top of it but everyone else’s houses look pristine?

How?

Anyone else’s toddler still not into food?

My daughter is almost 23 months and is not interested in food. She constantly wants milk and does not care about eating. I’ve spoken to gps and health visitors etc but they said to keep trying and she’s gaining weight so they’re not concerned. She’s always been quite low in weight and her centile is around 25th which has improved from her being 9th but I still really worry about her and feel like I’m failing

Potty training help please im about to kill myself

I have 2 kids in diapers. A 4.5 year old on the spectrum and a NT 22 months old. Im trying the no pants no diaper nothing method. Its been 2 days. I dont have much hope for my 4.5 yr old but i am having the hardest time with my 22 months old. She understands everything. She tells me when she peed or pooped and gets a diaper to get changed and doesnt like to be bothered when shes pooping and hides. When i ask where pee and poo goes, she says potty. But after 2 days, i still havent gotten 1 pee in the potty. I sit with her every 30 min because she pees on the floor every 30 min. I will sit with her with toys and stuff for 1 hour and she wont go. As soon as shes off the potty, she will pee on the floor. If i catch her peeing and grab her to bring her to the potty, she will stop peeing and hold her pee until shes off the potty and finish it on the floor. She also finds it funny and starts laughing. Is this normal? How long will it take for get it? My friend said shes not ready but she is showing signs and i cannot have 2 grown kids in diapers. Also if anyone has tips to potty train an autistic kid, please share. I am losing my mind. I cry everyday over this. The pressure from family and friends because my kids arent potty trained is getting heavy.