my in laws keep kissing my baby

my baby is only a few months old but i have told everyone multipls times to not kiss her, but they clearly just dont respect me or my husband for that matter since my husband has also told them, either they will secretly kiss her when we're not watching or blatantly in front of and its on THE FACE! it's really just pissing me off now and i'd rather not visit them at all and cut contact but i know that would upset my partner I JUST DONT GET WHAT IT IS WITH KISSING BABIES WHEN YOURE NOT THE PARENTS! plus they're smokers! WE dont kiss our baby just because of germs and things we're scared and they dont care at all. i'm just seriously tired.

Am i overreacting or what? I just want my baby not to catch anything, she can't protect herself!

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I would suggest talking with your partner first about cutting them off to see how he would react and if he reacts in a negative way ask him for another solution but a solution permanently if he agrees on cutting them off I would say maybe talk to them and tell them that if they don’t stop that they won’t be able to see your baby (I’ll doubt they’ll respect that since you said they keep crossing the boundary)

I agree with Keila, talk with your partner first. I had a discussion with mine about my FIL using AI and consequence if he puts her image into an AI. may be on the same page as far as kissing the baby and possibly germs. They may agree that limiting their access to yalls child. That's a fair boundary: if they wont stop kissing your child, the consequence is that they will not be able to see that child 🤷🏻‍♀️

I’d take the baby back straight away. “We don’t kiss the baby. If you continue, you won’t be holding them”

Urgh gives me the biggest ick this. My inlaws where the same and literally threw tantrums like children because I said no kissing!
Its ridiculous and just weird

This! My in laws did the same! Either ignored it or did it and say they forgot 🙄it was infuriating. They’ve been much better recently though :)

Remind or get your partner to remind them in person and over message.

Explain the rationale as well.

Ask them to please respect your rule and boundaries otherwise unfortunately you will not be able to hold baby. Then stick to it.

If they kiss baby, take her back and reiterate the rule.

If you have an age where you are happy for her to be kissed tell them.

Offer an alternative ie blowing a kiss, kissing their hand then placing it on back of the head, a cuddle, etc.

they probably will get pissed off. That’s okay. Your baby, your rules. They don’t have to agree just need to respect them. Your baby health comes first, not their happiness or frustration around the rule.

You’re not overreacting. It is disrespectful of them. If a parent sets a rule for their child, they should stick to it. It does not matter if they agree or not.

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