Husband criticizing everything i do
It feels like every day, every hour I'm doing something wrong. I have a 3yo and a 9mo and I do a lot of it on my own. He works a lot so I don't expect him to do much but he doesn't realize how much I do. And when I ask him to do something he gets an attitude. Like when our 3yo has to go potty I'm always the one that has to go with her. And I don't even have to do anything, I just stand there, hand her tp, and make sure she wipes. But literally everytime I ask him to take her I get an attitude. Like it's the hardest job in the world. And on top of not getting help, I'm just a bad mom. Ive been in survival mode for forever, so I get frustrated easily. I'm trying to be better about it but I'm just exhausted mentally and physically... Everyday it's hes making comments about how I shouldn't be doing this or I should be doing that. 3yo hasn't had a bath in a couple days, the kitchen is a mess, the laundry isn't done. Every time he criticized me i feel this ball of anger in my chest grow another inch. I feel like the worst mom in the world like i failed my children...
What do you think?
I need a third party outside perspective.
My boyfriend and I got in a fight last week, and I decided to stay at my sister’s house. My child was with a sitter over night, and I just figured I’d rather have a girls night with her than go home alone.
Now my house is currently under renovations, so I have unhung drywall resting against the walls downstairs and in the upstairs hallway.
Anyways, I got home the next morning and all the drywall in the hallway was crumpled into tiny pieces, and tossed in the bathroom entryway. Nothing else in the house was moved or touched. My door was unlocked that night.
Now I left my house the day before around 2, when the contractor was still working, and didn’t come home til next morning, so I assumed maybe they had an accident or something. I texted him. The contractor swears they didn’t do it, and said they don’t know how that would’ve happened, because nothing else was touched and if someone broke in, they had tools and stuff worth a lot of money that was untouched. My cash savings were untouched. And nothing else looks out of place.
I called my boyfriend right away, and he agreed it was weird and asked how they got in, I told him the door was unlocked, and he yelled at me because he’s always telling me to lock my door. But he swears it wasn’t him, and I believed him.
My parents think my boyfriend didn’t though. They asked who else would have motive and said it’s weird that the drywall was the only thing damaged. But if he was mad at me, I don’t know why he’d ruin the unhung drywall and not my other valuables? He knows where I keep everything. Also, he’s never just gone into my house and broken stuff before, and I was on the phone with him most of the night I was at my sisters house while he cried and begged me to come back to his place.
I don’t know what to think honestly.
Men have it "easier"
Men and women definitely have their own hardships, but I feel like majority of men will never understand how much harder it is to be a women.
Women are held to such high expectations, there's so much judgement around anything we do from men and even other women.
It's like nothing you do is ever right. Even if you ignore everyone else and their unnecessary opinions, I feel like it still gets to you eventually.
Most women are also living their lives in fear because of men who have traumatized them. Chances are if you see a women, nine times out of ten that women has probably been abused by a man emotionally, physically, sexually, or more than one.
Take childbirth into consideration.
For men it's just 30 seconds and then they go about their business, not for women. We sacrifice our body and mind to carry children, nourish them, and protect them. While some men check themselves out, cheating because "we never have sex anymore" or even just straight up leaving.
Women are almost always depicted as dramatic or hormonal. Expected to do it all and keep a smile on your face the whole time. It's ok for a man to need a break, but when a women does she's a bad mother.
Most men just don't understand what it's like, and they never will.
