Is it childish to want/expect birthday fuss?

So.. long story short, my birthday is coming up,
and I get annoyed that hubby doesnt make a fuss of anything anymore.. will say im a grown adult i shouldn't care... but i do? cz he doesnt care about these things, he didnt even get me a mothers day card from the kids this year, or plan anything, no gifts etc. said we will go out for mothers day the week after as the actual weekend was too busy (but we didnt).

and if i get a bit funny like i mentioned, "oh its good mothers day comes before fathers day and my birthday comes before yours so i know how much effort to make" a "truth in jest" comment, he responds with, I dont care though/ I dont care about gifts or things/ we can do absolutely nothing for my birthday or father's day, it doesnt bother me. and its childish that I want stuff.
but the truth is, I dont really want anything extravagant or expensive, its just a bit of fuss?! I cant even say what exactly it is, I just want to feel special i suppose? like just some thought or effort. heartfelt message in a card?

like he used to send me flowers to work, or plan a romantic dinner, buy presents etc before. but like literally nothing now. even the last few years he'd nip to the shop on the actual day or the day before to grab a card and flowers maybe.. which in the case of mothers day is crazy to me cz I have to go out and get flowers/cards etc from us and the kids for his mom (and mine, if we're seeing her the same weekend) in advance.

I will add, other than this, hes a fantastic dad and hubby. so the last few years ive shrugged it off. I think this year cz i didnt even get a mothers day card its felt worse. and hence im not expecting much for my birthday either...
Its just sad cz we used to make so much effort for special days, now I jjst make all that effort for the kids days, but it does hurt that once/twice a year u cant make any effort for me?
like what is this teaching our kids? my son thought it was a grandma day on the mothers day earlier this year!!

and as a result ive stopped making a fuss for him too, but again it just feels a bit sad.
we all know as mums how much we do on a daily basis and the mental load, like am I asking for too much? what would u do?

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