Perineal massage

It was soo uncomfortable for both os if the first few times 🥲 it was awkward and weird and so painful. But just do it for short intervals the first week or so until you can handle more pressure and more time. It does get easier I assure you! Don’t mean to scare you but my partner did this for me from 36 weeks until 40 weeks and I had to have an emergency c section in the end! So I didn’t find out the benefits but I’ve definitely seen a lot of women talk about the benefits of it :) hang in there girly it’ll get easier!

Yeah I felt very uncomfortable for the first week! You’re stretching and pushing on an area that’s not been stretched in that way before so it will be uncomfortable. But if it helps, I did perineal massage for 5-10 mins every day from about 35 weeks and had no perineal tears and it was my first, it defo works so do persevere! I did some U shaped movements but mostly went between two movements: holding my thumbs at each side to stretch it out sideways, and holding a thumb at the bottom (pressing down toward my bum) to stretch downwards, holding them for 1 min at a time. I went back and forth between those movements just a few times, never longer than 10 mins, usually just 5, but made sure to do it every day (defo forgot a few days though). Also I used sunflower oil which worked well and I always did it straight after a warm shower or bath!

I don't think it should be painful. You're only gently stretching the muscle a little. I think it's easier to gage how much pressure to apply if you do it yourself as your partner can't feel the pain. It's difficult to reach over the bump, but if you put your arm behind you instead so you're passing your bum, you get better reach and a better angle too.

I had no tears on all 3 of my births, even the very fast ones. But I do have to say, I think perineal massage is just part of the reason and you have to be mindfully prepared to slow down when you approach the ring of fire. I asked my midwife to guide me when I was approaching that point and thats really what gave my perineum time to stretch