partner struggling

my partner is struggling at the moment with the fact that my 4 week old only really settles for me and stays asleep when being held by me or next to me. his paternity leave was only for 2 weeks and he does things like nappy changes and bottle feeds but he finds it hard when baby starts fussing and won’t settle. his ears are also sensitive to the newborn screech crying which doesn’t help either. he wants to be able to give me a rest and a break for longer than 20 mins and he wants to have a connection to baby like me and i’ve explained to him that baby boy sees me as an extension of him and clinginess is normal at this stage, but is there any other good advice i could give him?

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That’s so lovely that he is trying, I know a lot of fathers wouldn’t bother.

Yes of course mother is baby’s number one and for boys will be number one till almost puberty!
Your explanation is absolutely right especially at that early age.

Father bonding probably requires more effort and time just don’t give up. Also I read somewhere about studies on father skin on skin contact being beneficial for baby’s development in some ways so maybe try that!

Your explanation is absolutely right. That's why they see mom as a primary carer. Yes, as said above skin to skin, reading books, story telling, showing any black and white books or sensory toys and spending time when he is awake. Sometimes the body temperature of dad may be slightly higher than mom's that makes the baby uncomfortable at times. To avoid noise, he can use some headphones. Main thing, whoever is handling the baby should try to stay as calm as possible. Maybe few deep breaths. If we get nervous or panic, baby's will get agitated quickly. Co-regulation is the main key, I learnt this later in a hard way.

This is a phase, it will change soon. Appreciate that, "he is trying his level best to make use of the PL" .

Take care xx

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