Mamas with depression, anxiety, and other mental health disorders

Husband has mental health, is his behaviour acceptable?

So my husband has mental health issues. He says it’s because of the pain he is going through ( had a small accident, but not something that should affect his whole body!). He hit his head.. mri came back fine. But he had a panic attack, and life changed since.

He doesn’t live with us anymore, saying the kids are stress, and we were living at my parents, and my dad has copd so he is scared something will happen to him.

He also avoids talking to me about normal life things, like deciding on children schools, or anything really.

Sometimes he ignores me, saying I am making his mental health worse ( I was asking whether it’s okay to delay his sicknote by a week to his employer ( he’s been off work for time).

He just randomly walks off leaving me and the kids alone

We met him today, and he had a hospital appt. When leaving, he didn’t even say good bye to our child or me, he just walked off saying he has an appt).

Then he gets gifts for the kids, and does show he cares. So I’m really confused.

I don’t know what to do. Just so overwhelming. I don’t know if this is normal?

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I’d love to say something but since I also suffer from severe mental health issues I don’t want the comment to stay up for everyone to see.
If you are open to DMing me or love to tell u something

As someone who deals with panic attacks sometimes, I get how life forever changes after. It 100% changed my life forever. And I do kind of think of my life as before and after that first one. So in a way my heart goes out to him.

When I’m in a panic moment, I can’t be nice or calm to my spouse. But we make plans while I’m calm on what I want him to do. He cannot talk to me or touch me.

How long ago did this happen? I would suggest getting in medication and therapy. But it will still take some time.

I think a lot of people are going to say he is a parents and still needs to act like it. But I also think we need to recognize that our partners are people and sometimes cannot pull their weight. Talk to him and see if you guys can come up with a plan.

By definition mental health issues are not normal and won't feel normal. It sounds like he needs help but it also sounds like he's getting it.

He doesn’t even want to live with us.
And where he is living at the moment, is not even making him happy either. ( At first he did, he was great for a week, and it all
Fell apart again). It’s strange isn’t it? As if he was in so much pain as he says, how could he have been so perfect that week? - makes me think the pain is somatic- ofcourse it’s real, but not dangerous.
Well it all started after the panic attack.
I am struggling, struggling mentally as I don’t know what to do anymore. I am completely exhausted from running around juggling the kids, himself, myself and school etc and other people around me and their opinions.

I still want to help him, and I don’t know how. He doesn’t want to speak to me about these either, when I give advice but he offloads every feeling he has. He says he just wants someone to listen and approve what he says, but doesn’t give me the same space I need, even if it’s to discuss our children’s needs/ school things etc.

It’s possible your husband is mentally struggling as well as being a bit of a selfish a-hole.

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Having a child but not learning about child development, behaviours and actions?

I think it’s very common for parents to research and learn about baby development but we seem to think once they can talk then we’re done and they should know better.

Doctors receptionist and a small rant

Has anyone else’s GP surgery started asking if this is an “urgent medical request”?
For reference I’ve got a young toddler with green gunky eyes she’s had for over a week I’ve done my best to keep away from the doctors and treated with breastmilk and cooled boiled water and I’ve taken her to the pharmacy to see if they could treat it. But they said because of her age she was too young to be using anything over the counter. Plus she’s woken up rubbing her ears and are full of wax so is suspect an ear infection ontop of things. So basically it’s time to get her checked by a Gp.

I said all of the above and the lady on reception still asked if I felt she was needing to be seen my a doctor and I said well yeah I guess so hence why I’m calling 🤷🏼‍♀️😐

Honestly genuine question, why do they make you feel like you’ve either got to be having a heart attack to warrant an appointment? I do feel for them as I’m sure they get so many time wasters and I know appointment are few and far between but truly i just don’t feel like it warrants being made to feel like your asking for the world when you call with a genuine medical issue.

I’m really struggling with this attitude you are met with. I’m self employed pay my taxes and if I spoke to any of my customers in that fashion I would t have a business. So why do they get away with it?

Sorry rant over

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