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Moms in their 30’s

Not how I envisioned things…

Just have to vent. I’m 38. I’ve wanted a family since my early 20s. I finally had my baby boy born in May. The only problem now is his father.

We met at work during a period of my life when I thought I was smart enough to know when someone was feeding me BS. I was single and abstinent for four years, just focusing on me. We started hanging out. He constantly told me he wanted to have a baby with me & that he wanted to change my last name. Granted, it was only after a month or so. I should’ve known better, but I didn’t.

I found out I was pregnant in October of 2025, and once I told him, he didn’t want to hang out with me anymore. He said he should’ve never told me he wanted to get me pregnant and change my name, which truly made me sick to my stomach.

He had nothing to do with the pregnancy. He didn’t even know I gave birth. He found out by accident, running into someone I know who brought it up, thinking he knew. Fast forward: a couple of months have passed since my son was born, and he has only called twice. The first time he called was basically to let me know he knew & nothing else. I told myself I wouldn't answer again, but I thought maybe he would change. The second time he called was basically to flirt with me and see if he still has me wrapped around his finger because I'll admit he did when I was pregnant. After all, I wanted it to work even though it clearly was not going to. He never asked me if I needed anything or how our boy is doing. He mentioned he might come visit us; he commented that he would get me pregnant again, to which I replied It’s not happening. He wouldn’t even say our son’s name out loud. He said, “You know who,” & I couldn’t believe he was referring to him. I said I needed to go because I didn’t want to give him a reaction on the phone. He also facetimed me those two times and never asked to see him.

It just makes me sad that he is so detached from the reality that we have a son. All he cares about is messing with me. I just didn’t think this is what my life was going to be. I don’t want to be the bitter baby mama who keeps him away from his kid, but he literally doesn’t ask about him, and I don’t want to answer his calls anymore. All it does is make me sad. Am I wrong for making this decision?