Help!!

My LO is 4 weeks old and won't stop feeding. We had a rough start to breastfeeding due to some complications with birth and then she was jaundice and wouldn't latch, so she started being cup fed in hospital, then syringe fed and then moved to a bottle. I started pumping whilst in hospital at around 3 days PP but she was having to have formula as well as I wasn't producing enough. She was found to have a tongue tie which was snipped nearly 2 weeks ago. Since then, shes been latching great, we've managed to slowly reduce the amount of bottles in the day, and I'm desperately trying not to give any more bottles of formula. The last 5 days or so, she will not let me put her down at all, she is constantly showing hunger cues, so I latch her. During the day she normally sucks for 5-10 mins before falling asleep, but then as soon as I put her down, she'll be wanting to feed again. If I don't put her down and continue to hold her, she'd probably stay settled. I continue this all day, until the evening, where she will latch forever, last night she had been latched for over 2 hours in the space of 3 hours, and still will come away unsettled. I end up giving her a bottle every evening still because I cannot continue, and genuinely think we would carry on like that all night if I didn't. I know this is likely cluster feeding but it feels excessive. I am worried that I am still not producing enough for her, and thats why she won't settle, because she is genuinely still hungry. When I pump, I only get between 0.5 oz- 1.5 oz. combined. I am latching her between 10-18 times a day at the min, and she will feed anywhere between 5-55 mins, so am struggling to find the time to pump in between, especially seeing as she won't let me put her down. I know everyone says giving a bottle is the worst thing you can do for supply, but I also don't think I'd get a second of sleep if I didn't give it! My partner works away from home so am struggling to get anything done at all. Sorry for a huge rant, but any advice would be appreciated, or just to know I'm not alone in this 😅😅

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FTM here so only have my experience from my little lad. He's now 4 months.

Around 4 weeks he clusterfed like crazy, very similar behaviour to what you've described.

Things I did to survive:
* Told myself this was temporary
* Never bothered setting myself up in bed each time he started showing this feeding pattern. Instead I grabbed my best pillows, my neck pillow, his bassinet, a snack tray and set myself up on the sofa. Watched trashy TV and whenever he fell asleep ( no matter how long) I put him down and would close my eyes on the sofa. Sometimes it was 5mins others 20.
* Lowered my everyday expectations in terms of chores. The bare minimum got done. If that meant a week of no laundry so be it. I caught up when we'd both had some proper sleep.

You are not alone ❤️❤️❤️ it does pass.
As long as baby is gaining weight, generally good in himself and has 6+ wet nappies she is doing great.

You're doing a fantastic job mumma!

Oh.. ps. (Sorry it won't let me reply to my own comment)

I have often given my lad a bottle of expressed milk or had my partner give him one just so my breasts can have a break 😅😅

Breastfeeding is tough ❤️❤️ sack of the trying to pump if it's too much mental load (I honestly don't bother when my lad wants more feeds than usual).

But once again, you're doing an amazing job and you got this!

My first was attached to me 24/7 & it was draining! I was desperate to ebf so I persevered. The cluster feeding does calm down but wow it’s hard so well done! 👏

My second I combi fed from the start & it’s been a much better experience. I just give a formula bottle when I need a break & it allows me to ‘fill up’ and haven’t had any cluster feeding. So don’t worry about supply if you give a bottle here & there it won’t suddenly stop your supply. You can hand express/pump to help with engorgement/supply if you need ☺️

My baby is only breastfeeding so far but my afternoons and evenings have been as you described - back to back , really intense feeding since day one and he is 3 weeks old tomorrow. He gets really frustrated and doesn't latch properly the longer it goes on. However, he does crash pretty consistently and sleeps around 10:30pm and we get some rest and a good reset at night.

I'm only just starting to notice that his daytime naps are getting a bit longer and if I go out for an afternoon walk in the pram it helps to break the cycle for a little while. I'm going to a feeding clinic this week to see if I can get some pointers to make his feeding more effective but it might just be that he wants to stay latched most of the time for comfort and have been reassured that it is normal at this stage.

I was exactly the same, you are able to combi feed. Please don't listen to everything.

I was breastfeeding during the day, then ready bottles at night so we could both get some sleep as it is very exhausting. And it worked & helped and I was so relieved!!!!! I was scared at first, but my good friend recommended it and it was honestly the best thing I had ever done.

It's cluster feeding mixed with comfort. My son was exactly the same, and it was extremely hard and overwhelming. I just remember crying alot!

It is a phase and it will pass, but you just need to do what you feel is right without overworking yourself mama.

Sending hugs, hope you get through it and this helps x

in our community

Do you get slightly annoyed when comments go completely off topic to what was asked? Examples below

Some examples from things I posted or saw:
1. I posted a while ago asking if anyone gave birth alone (by choice) so that their child was safe at home with the other parent. Immediately people were like "I wouldn't give birth alone" "you need someone there" or the icing on the cake was someone commenting "your husband shouldn't let you do it alone"...like it's my choice he's not "letting me" in any way 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️ just none of those comments are what I asked, when I said specifically those who HAVE

2. Someone states they aren't doing nursery (and are not changing their mind) then people comment how it's needed for this and that or how great it is... Again not what was asked

3. Someone having a tough relationship and someone posts that their partner is great and how they didn't experience this or that, when it wasn't asked

4. Someone asking about a C-section and advice on them and people coming on and saying "it's a major surgery I wouldn't" or "you should try vaginal" when they CLEARLY stated that they ARE getting a C-Section

I just find it slightly annoying as in I shake my head because I find some people can't read the room

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So my baby boy is 11 months old and I can’t seem to get a nappy change done with-ought him grabbing his baby parts and yanking on it😅. The poor boy doesn’t know when to stop and end up hurting himself but he’s far too young for me to teach him that he can’t pull it like that. We do no nappy time and all he does is play with it, now before anyone says it becouse I know I would I’m not bothered about him playing with it it feels nice to him and that’s all it is for him however I need to find a way for him to stop hurting himself anyone els baby does this and is there anything I can do for him to stop hurting himself or just let him learn

Detergent for newborn clothes

What do you wash baby’s first clothes with? I’ve heard lots of people mention fairy non bio - but not sure if liquid or powder, and is it better to go for something scent free?

Routine

Does anyone have a set routine for their babies yet? With my first I know we were on a 4 hour loop from 8am-8pm but my second just seems so unpredictable.

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LO has been potty trained in the day since 23 months. About a month after being potty trained in the day so 24 months she started to wake up dry in the mornings more nights than not. This went on for a while. Then she started to wake up saying she needed a wee around 1 night a week and dry the other days. I’d go in and say it’s fine you have a nappy on and most of the time she go for a wee in it, sometimes she’d refuse and say potty. I now realise I shouldn’t have said it’s fine you have a nappy as thats her telling me she’s ready and a good thing. The last month she has been waking up more and more saying she needs a wee and won’t use her nappy at night atall which I know is amazing but she used to go most nights 11-12 hours completely dry where as now she’s waking up once every night needing a wee and I don’t get why she suddenly can’t hold it? The only thing that’s change is she’s probably drinking more in the day due to the heat this last month. Has anyone else had this? Could it simply be because she’s drinking more? I wouldn’t say it’s loads more. Is it normal to wake up more during the night the older she gets? Is it just because she’s becoming more aware? It was nearly every single night she’d wake up dry before. Im going to try and limit water intake before bed as I do let her have a drink when having a story but I feel mean due to it being hot. I know I should be happy she’s done this by herself so quickly and I am but she’s always been such a good sleeper 11-12 hours and I am not used to wake ups. She does go back to sleep straight away which is amazing but I can’t! It’s once a night so I’m not I’m not worried about uti. I’m just really confused how she’s gone from holding it all night to not being able to and it’s driving me insane not knowing what’s changed.

Question for postpartum and your relationship

I need to know I’m not the only one. Has anyone else, during postpartum, felt like they suddenly couldn’t stand their partner? Everything they do annoys you, conversations go nowhere, and you honestly start wondering if being a single parent would be less stressful. Is this a postpartum thing, or has anyone else felt this way?