Is grieving normal when I didn't lose my baby?

I have a three month old daughter and I still have this gaping hole in me as if I lost her. She's right here in my arms, why am I grieving? Is it normal? I feel so much joy with how she's growing, but I feel such sorrow for the baby she once was. Any suggestions for coping? The only thing I want to do is hold her close to absorb her back into my body and I can't.

in our community

Breastfeeding

Hi guys, It’s day 5 for us and I’m really struggling with this whole breastfeeding situation.

The latching, the constant having to get your breast out to feed, and feeling like my body is no longer really mine… I feel awful saying it, but right now I honestly just feel like a cow!

Then there’s the constant “be careful what you eat because you’re breastfeeding” comments from people, which are stressing me out even more. I’m already overthinking whether everything I eat is going to make baby gassy or uncomfortable.

I know we’re only 5 days in and everything is still so new, but does it get easier? Did anyone else feel like this at the beginning? And how much attention do you actually pay to what you eat while breastfeeding?

Bed time

My daughter is 15 months old & I started putting her in her own cot last night in her room as we have been co sleeping for a while. I got her to sleep in my bed then transferred her to her room, she lasted till around 1:30/2 but then wouldn’t settle again so had to get back in my bed. Has anyone got any tips to help her settle more?
I was thinking of changing her cot into a toddler bed.
Thankyou ! ❤️

Pacifiers? I didn’t want to start since I don’t want her to stay dependent on it.

I’ve managed to not used one so far but it’s getting hard not too since the four month sleep regression has started and my husband is against it…

Bag recommendations

My toddler is 3 n half so I don't need to bring so much stuff with me when we go out like when I had a huge change bag for milk bottles, nappies etc.

Anyone recommend a bag thats NOT a huge change bag lol

Mentally struggling

I am in the worst place mentally I’ve been in for a long time. Triggered by a really challenging day yesterday with my 14 month old. I’m in my first trimester and it’s been so much harder this time around and I’ve had sickness from the start. At the same time I returned to work, lo started nursery and he’s been having numerous different sleep issues and separation anxiety. My patience is much thinner and recently I’ve been struggling with rage. Yesterday was awful and I just feel like I wasn’t meant to be a mum and I’m no good for him. I’m convinced he hates me. That he’d be better off without me and would do better being raised by his dad instead. This has now led to a HUGE argument with my husband this morning. What doesn’t help is he had made comments today and previously about my parenting, how I am towards my baby and almost making out like my son is scared of me which only emphasises the negative thoughts. Ive done all the parenting from day one on my own while my husband works full time, I’ve got no other support. And I don’t feel like my husband supports me or looks out for me in the way I need and when I bring this up he makes excuses. Like he takes everything I do for granted without any signs of appreciation. Just dropped my baby off at nursery and now sat in my car sobbing trying to find it in me to get into work

Pram

I am pregnant with baby number 2. I have a 2 year old and am due any day.

Anyone else with a toddler, what are you doing about a pram?

The pram is only really used for when we go to town, shopping, long walks etc. She will still have the occasional nap in the pram if we’re out and obviously being 2, still needs to get in the pram at times but likes to walk mostly.

I don’t want to spend a fortune on a double pram and barely use it.

Also, most prams are twin prams so don’t have the baby bassinet part unless you spend a fortune.

I have seen the buggy board but am unsure if she is still a bit young for this?

What is everyone else doing?