Who is in the wrong?

You said the car seat has been in your car for a week, is it usually in his car?
And on one hand yes you should have checked the seat was there but equally he should have said "oh by the way I have the seat"

If he took the child in the morning would you not assume he had the seat? Or had he come back home inbetween dropping the child off?

I probably wouldn't have checked the car either if I were in your shoes!!

Hindsight is a lovely thing x

Both imo. He should’ve communicated better but you also should’ve checked to make sure it was there especially if it’s been between cars as you said it’s only been in yours the last week and he took your child this morning.

Easily done on your half but still both could have made different actions to prevent that entire outcome ..

Innocent mistake though

Idk in my brain, if yall have two car seats, one car seat should be in each of your cars

Id just write this one off as shit happens. Hindsight thoughts about how to avoid again and just move on. Not worth blame placing for an accident.

Both, you said you had no reason to check if the car seat was there, but knew that he took him to nursery so where else would it be?

Why do you both not have car seats in your cars?

Neither in the wrong. Honest mistake and miscommunication 💜

Neither in the wrong. Sounds like an honest mistake while living busy lives. But can’t you just keep each car seat in each car? That way this won’t happen again!

This has happened to me. But I am the one who took it out to clean my car and forgot! I think it’s just a honest mistake, but I would have been annoyed he didn’t communicate that he took it out and would ask him to not take it out again without letting you know and if possible to use the other one from the house

Surely you knew he had the car seat if he took your child in ... But also after a day of work I probably wouldn't think to check especially as you had it all week so I wouldn't think too much into it and maybe just try communicate a little better 🙂

I’m sure having to give the baby back to nursery and confusing the child leading to them being upset was really stressful and felt upsetting and unnecessary but I think it was just a miscommunication and not a huge deal

My husband has done similar things. Such as this morning he went to work with his car. We had went with his car to his grandparents house so had both carseats in the car. I realized maybe five minutes after he left for work that he didn't take the carseats out. I called him and told him that I needed the carseats this morning I had a meeting this afternoon at around 2pm before he left. He said he couldn't bring them back. He was too focused on finding his work shirt this morning that he didn't remember what I said to him earlier that morning. He told me he looked at our joint calendar and I told him it had been on the calendar for at least a week. That he needs to think of these things too and that I had told him this morning about my meeting before he went to take a shower.

I agree with it’s a mistake I wouldn’t be angry with him. You have a right to feel anger but not direct it at him. I would just ask him to let you know if he’s taken the car seat/not given it back or if he’s forgetful then buy another car seat.

He was in the wrong and very inconsiderate.

You always return to their place the things that you borrow. Others shouldn't have to be looking for them, double checking, guessing where they are and solving because someone else didn't want to bother.

This would make him lose access to my car keys.

Why didn't he take the other car seat? Is it more work? Is it easier to take yours? Why doesn't he keep the other car seat inside his car?

Let's say you check your car before going, why should you be the one who installs back the car seat when he was the one who took it out? That is a lame excuse and he is blaming you for his mistake.

Thanks everyone for your thoughts on this!

I definitely over reacted a bit and appreciate we're both at fault. For context he normally has a car seat in his car but he had to take it out because he was taking a load of wood to the dump, so it was in the house instead. We normally have one in each car.

I think we've both learnt a lesson from it, but I do still think he is slightly more to blame 🫣

Considering you both have your own car seats you use and his was in the house, I wouldn’t have assumed that the one in your car would’ve been taken out either. It seems like miscommunication and him potentially getting whatever was the closest at the time but yes something to learn from

The situation is shitty and having to leave kid again is also shitty. I like to keep the frame of mind that my husband doesnt intentionally do things to make my life harder. We are both exhausted and sometimes miscommunications happen. I would calmly say hey this happened, next time either of us takes the car seat out, we should just shoot a text to the other parent letting them know.

Sounds like a lapse in communication

I get it's annoying it's happened a few times with me and my husband, but it's always been an accident. We both now always check if we have everything in the car, though spmetimes we forget that too 😄😅

Sounds like a communication issue between the both of you because he didn't tell you and you assumed that the car say would be there. A simple conversation just to say how to move forward. That's all it takes. Because maybe your child likes the car sitting in your car more because all cars used are not equal.