Visitors after baby is born

I'm curious about people's experience with letting family and friends visit after giving birth. Since this is our first baby, my mom is wanting to be at the hospital and at our house immediately after baby is here. I had to tell her I want it to just be me and my husband, and that I want time to decide when we are ready for visitors after baby is born. My mom lives about 4.5 hours away, and even if they get a hotel, she will want to spend every minute with us while she is visiting. I told her I don't want to give her false expectations if I want more time than she wants to wait. At the same time, I understand it's the first grandchild and she wants to be a part of everything. I'm just a people pleaser and will struggle to rest with anyone at the house, especially out of town visitors. What did you do, if this is not your first baby? How much time did you feel was right to make family wait?

I will also add, our other family members and friends have not put any pressure or even asked about it. It is just my mom so far that is upset that I haven't given her the answer she wants.

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Following because I’m in a similar boat

So with my first, my mom lives close I wanted her around, we welcomed the help. She didn’t just come to hold the baby she came to help take care of me, do house chores, make food, literally anything we needed she was more than happy to do, same with my second and will be the same with the third! Now with that being said my mom absolutely respected whatever my husband and I wanted. I did ask her for a few days to just be us and the baby and she was totally understanding so was my mother in law and everyone else. We r very blessed in that way but if they didn’t respect those wishes I’d put my foot down, that’s YOUR baby not your moms. Respectfully tell her you appreciate all she does but this is intimate time you want to bond with your baby and husband and when you’re ready you’ll let her know. If she escalates it or is mad, that’s for her to deal with. Everyone is so excited and it’s understandable she wants to be apart of that but she still needs to respect your guys wishes❤️

Also following because my situation is pretty similar! I finally told one of my sisters today that I am hoping to have the first week to myself and to adjust as a family of 3. She was really cool about it. Now I just have to tell my 3 other siblings, my parents and my partners family (who lives nearby). I agree that it will be hard for me to rest when I am also “hosting” my family who lives 5 hours away. I want some time to heal and to spend time with just us for at least the first week 🥹

I had to many set rules not many people came over or wanted to visit it. We allowed my mother and mother in law over once we got home and while at the hospital! The more help the better especially if you end up needing an emergency c-section!

My rules:
If sick or exposed to someone sick they can’t visit
No kissing baby no matter the body part
No smoking or vaping while visiting
Must wash hands each time before you hold baby
Must be sitting while holding baby ( my nerves while baby is super fresh )
Don’t fight when mom or dad ask for baby back
No ONE is allowed to post photos of baby unless mom and dad are okay

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Visitors after baby is born

I'm curious about people's experience with letting family and friends visit after giving birth. Since this is our first baby, my mom is wanting to be at the hospital and at our house immediately after baby is here. I had to tell her I want it to just be me and my husband, and that I want time to decide when we are ready for visitors after baby is born. My mom lives about 4.5 hours away, and even if they get a hotel, she will want to spend every minute with us while she is visiting. I told her I don't want to give her false expectations if I want more time than she wants to wait. At the same time, I understand it's the first grandchild and she wants to be a part of everything. I'm just a people pleaser and will struggle to rest with anyone at the house, especially out of town visitors. What did you do, if this is not your first baby? How much time did you feel was right to make family wait?

I will also add, our other family members and friends have not put any pressure or even asked about it. It is just my mom so far that is upset that I haven't given her the answer she wants.

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