MIL constantly cries to get her way

My daughter is the only grandchild on both sides. MIL sees my daughter 1-2 times per month, my own mum sees her slightly more because a) she lives closer and b) I’m a SAHM and I’m just more comfortable around my mum so pop in to see her during the day / sometimes she will come to mine to help with washing or bring me food if I’m having a tough day. I have told my husband I’m not entertaining his mum solo because she makes digs at me every time I see her and she can’t respect any boundaries (eg nagged me about wanting to visit hours after birth, told me I’m being silly when not feeding my daughter dairy as I suspected a dairy allergy).

Randomly MIL will call my husband “just checking how you guys are doing”. Then do the typical “I’m a bit down today but it’s nothing. No I’m ok. Oh it doesn’t matter, I just feel a bit sad. No I can’t tell you why because I don’t want to affect your choices. It’s ok, it’s nothing…” then cry. My husband falls for it and keeps asking her what’s wrong. Every time what’s wrong is that she was thinking about how she always hoped to be an involved granny but now nobody listens to her. She told me to stop breastfeeding and I didn’t do it, even though she was saying it “with love and best intentions”. She told me to enrol my daughter in a ballet class but I didn’t because I think she’s too small (2 years old). She told me to dress her more warmly and I didn’t. She wants to visit more and I always say “yes but not today as I’m busy, how about the weekend when husband is around?”

So fed up of the manipulation.

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Why does everyone react but not comment

She sounds like a handful but it looks like your husband isn’t forcing her on you right? Or does he get angry at you for not involving her more? I think you’re doing great at putting your foot down and not letting her boss you around in how you should raise your daughter

I should have added, it leads to an argument every time because we’ve made his poor mummy upset and she doesn’t get to see my baby as much as she’d like

Oh well, too bad so sad in my eyes. The manipulation and narcissism is present and toxic and just an all around no thank you for me. It’s your child not hers and she should keep opinions to herself unless your baby is in real danger which doesn’t sound like she is.

It's understandable that you are more comfortable with your mom at least you are still trying to let her see your baby. you're just not taking her advice and you don't need to take anybody's advice I don't know what age you or your mil are but my mom's generation was f****** nuts with us I'll see I'm shocked some of us are alive

the whole telling someone they're feeling down but then not wanting to tell them is annoying to me but maybe you should talk to your husband about not pushing cuz that kind of sounds like what she wants and that's kind of messed up for someone to be like I don't feel happy today and you're like "what's wrong, tell me what's wrong, what's wrong ,what's wrong" and they keep saying that they don't want to say what's wrong so drop it clearly they dont want to say so why push

My MIL did this. Literally cried down the phone to my Boyf cause I wouldn't let her see my 2 week old baby (at the time) because she was poorly. But he was luckily on my side. Before baby came I had mentioned about sickness and kissing etc and me and boyf had a huge argument cause he said I couldn't stop people kissing my child and I can't just say no. I was like you watch me 😂 anyway luckily when baby came he immediately defended all of my decisions.
Now I let her see baby once a week cause she's just too much for me. But GOD FORBID if we go over 7 days. So we saw her on Wednesday and it was "oh I haven't seen you in 9 days". Then she makes comments on Facebook how much she misses baby etc. Posting pictures of him that partner has sent her so she can tell everyone how much was missing in her life until he came along 🙄 and how she can't wait for the next snuggles. He's the first grandchild on both sides too. My mum is 90 miles away and I have zero family around me so it's actual hell at times.

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I also started a new business so I get money from there (from clients) but it's not too predictable, for now it's going to groceries only.

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need advice

need advice

i’m 3months postpartum.
my bump is on the way down but still there and feels hard.
i’m trying to be healthier & exercise..
but my husband keeps treating me!
coming home with mcdonald’s i didn’t ask for or sweet treats on shopping.

i’ve told him i didn’t ask for it and I’m trying to lose weight. it starts an argument and he tells me i’m ungrateful.. even though i never ask for mcdonald’s . he gets all grumpy and says i am ungrateful because i didn’t want him to bring home coffee or treats. i don’t ask for it

i feel like he doesn’t want me to look nice or start to have my life back again

*EDIT* he also cooks and serves my meals up..waayyyy too high! the bowl is literally over flowing. how can i tell him about portion control?