How to deal with sly sister in laws long post sorry

…. “Little girls ruin my marriage” tbh I feel like you’re the one who already has this anti sister in law mentality and you said it yourself - you always had vibes about them.
It almost sounds like you’re the one excluding yourself and I find it awesome that they want to see your baby, ofc they should greet you in your own home I agree with that but if they are “little girls” could it be they are just ignorant and don’t know any better? That they’re too excited to see your baby.
I think you should leave it alone, you said it yourself - you’re too old for this and their mom is amazing. Why cause any issues? If anything just keep distance if that’s what makes you feel better but I feel like this is a misconception and misunderstanding of how you perceive them. Reading the way you talk about them sound alike they’re very much immature and just don’t get it.
Also if someone tells me they’re putting their baby down for a nap or bed, then yeah I’m gonna leave as well.

can I just say a 23-27 isn’t little I just said that cos I was mad but I’m not excluding myself I’m just marching the energy I’ve been given lol? And about the putting baby to bed , i think that’s so rude because that just proves you only came over to see them and they know I have a strict bedtime routine and if we were cool you would stay in and chill with me even after ??

I mean I see your perspective as well - I have 4 sister in laws. All 22-38 years old. I’ve learned you get what you give and sometimes less or more. If talking to them will make you feel better then go for it but I just worry it will cause more issues than resolution.

I think it's best to just keep things civil and not force a close relationship with them. If they want to keep things casual then so be it, I find it's better that way anyway as it causes less drama. Perhaps try to spend more time with your friends if you are looking for company.

I couldn’t agree with your comment more tbh. I thought exactly the same x

Lots of second guessing going on leading to Paranoia and worrying. Easier to just ask them straight out what the heck is the issue here, is there an issue here, and if there is what are they going to do to fix it if they want a relationship with you/baby and if there isn't then sort themselves out and just get on with life.

I feel like it’s not paranoia it’s blantant disrespect disguised very slyly and I know they’re not confrontational so it would be awkward

It doesn't need to be a confrontation?

I thought I was the only who has a sil who gives off vibes when she sees me. The only difference is my sil never made effort to message me or come over to see my LO even though I always have. She would sometimes speak to me when I go over to hers or wouldn't say hello and then speak to me 2hrs later or ignore me. Especially when she's around people she acts like am invisible lol. I have no idea what her problem is because we never spoken. I'm not one to go and lick arse if someone is being disrespectful to me I will give them a taste of their own medicine and ignore them when I see them no one likes it then. So many times I wanted to confront, but I didn't because it will cause unnecessary problems, so now I just ignore it.

Assuming your sil is your husband's sister? As opposed to bil wife's? If it's husband sister I would try and hash it out. If it's bils wife (sil) then keep your distance.

Just wanna say that 1st comment is not it. When youre living and have a family dynamic, you expect it both ways. Stuff like this does ruin your marriage cos one conversation taken the wrong way can cause 100 arguments between you and your husband. The baby thing is rude. If youre stepping foot into my home when you want something and dont give me the time of day then why come? Youre showing that person they have no value. When youre being ignored and avoided by “family” its a nasty feeling esp considering this family are now meant to be closer than your own. Its giving bad vibes. Speak to your husband explain youre not causing a fight this is how you’ve been feeling a while and ask if hes picked up on anything they might’ve taken offence to. They may have had this convo with him already. If not ask him the best way to address the situation. I hope it all works out for you. If that all doesnt work keep a comfortable distance that works for all of you