How would you feel

When I met my partner he had a baby on the way due to circumstances he decided he wasn’t going to be around the baby even though I pushed him to be apart of her life he refused. Now a few years later 3 days ago he told me he saw her in the moms car. What was weird to me is he said the girl is so tall… how would he know? A day later he brought to me the conversation of getting his daughter and I asked him if he had spoken to the mom he said no. I checked his phone that same day because he left the house 2 times to put gas and realize the first time he left was when the mom and him had a conversation that the girl was asking about him from a new number and he had a FaceTime call of 1 hour. How did he get the number if he hadn’t spoken to her and how would the daughter know about him. I started adding 2+2 together and what gets me irritated is not that he wants to be with the daughter but why hide to me the fact he already did and the fact that they are talking again. Ps she has never stopped having feeling for him. And before anyone comments is a loonng story but i wasn’t a side chick they already split months before me meeting him and I told him to go back to his family bc I just had met him. How would you feel if your partner lied about this because I feel so hurt right now. Idk if I’m being childish but just why would that be kept a secret?

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Okay so what are you hurt about exactly? Him seeing his kid without letting you know? Maybe the way you come off, he felt uncomfortable to tell you. Just my POV

I'd feel angry and upset I'd been lied to and things hidden from me. And also suspicious. I don't think you are to blame for his actions either

Hmmm.. I’d confront him with everything you already know & simply ask the questions you want to know. Ask him why he’s felt the need to hide it especially when you encouraged a relationship between him & his daughter since day 1 (like you said) and then just ask the other questions; why did you lie about not having spoken to your ex etc etc. JUST ASK!

no not at all, I was always trying to get him to be apart of her life and I also had message her to let her know I would take care of her child like my own if she ever felt comfortable and she also refuse of him being apart of her life because of all the issues they had is such a long story but trust me I’ve tried my best. what I feel hurt about is why would he lied about talking to the mom and meeting her if I’ve always been supportive of that father and daughter relationship.

Knows what she’s talking about! I agree! 💯

Are you upset that he’s had the relationship you’ve actually wanted to him to have with his child since the beginning or are you upset that he reached out to the mother of his child without your acknowledgement due to his behavior towards the matter to begin with

I’m upset that he’s being sneaky and not telling me things like these. Not the child per day bc she has nothing to due with adult issues but the fact that he’s been seeing them and having conversations with the mom and the only reason I found out was bc I checked his phone because when I asked him if he was going to reach out he said to my face no but I will soon and later in the night I found out they already saw each other and talked. Also This sudden wanting to be with the daughter is weird bc I’ve been trying for 3 years for him to see her and now out of the blue he’s all in when he even said to me that is not my daughter she will never be around me. For three days straight last night including he even went to target which he never does and I’m assuming it was to buy the daughter things or idk if they all went together.

Also guys he has Two more kids who literally say they have been born from my belly bc of how much love we have for each other so for those who think the little girl is my issue it’s not. I love kids and why would I even mention her along the years if i didn’t want her near

wow our stories are so similar

in our community

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Is it just my husband that does this? He is able to work from home via his computer and in the mornings and evenings he is on there doing his job. When he is done for the day he tends to stay in the room and either play video games or watch something. He will occasionally come out and play with the girls for a few minutes and that’s it but when I really need him he says he is busy. My daughters are both 1 year old now and I am just wondering how much involvement should he have with them now?
Idk if this is the norm or not…..

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