PPD

I am 3 weeks PP. my husband went back to work after a week of having my little girl, I’ve been managing by myself with help from my in laws since we currently live with them. I have been very territorial with my baby, don’t really like when my in laws hold her, unless I need to eat or shower..I get irritated with little things they do. Or how this place isn’t our own so everything here is so inconvenient. I know I should be thankful they’re helping me, and I know it’s all just my PP getting to me, but I feel I cannot go through this unapologetically here. I feel very alone. Is it wrong that I’d rather go to my parents house (4 hours away) with my baby for a month? Even if it means leaving my husband for a little?

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It’s not wrong to have feelings ever. It may not be right to act on it. You may even feel sad when you leave and want to go back

He will understand if that’s what you need right now! 🫶🏻

Those feelings are totally valid! You are in such a tender time in your life that is all about bonding with your baby and trying to heal. My family always wanted to “help” by holding our baby when they visited, but thats what I wanted to be doing! I started asking for specific help with things instead when they would visit. If your in-laws want to help you out, would they be open to your suggestions of how to help… like if you asked for help with laundry, making you a meal, running an errand - so on. They can feel involved with the baby but be helping you in ways you actually need support. Are you feeling homesick? Can your parents come visit you where you’re living?

my parents have come over here for the weekend once, but it was just awkward with having both sets of grandparents who want to help with the baby. I knew I would have rather wanted my parents help and support than his parents help..it’s just leaving my husband will make me sad too..but being here makes me sad.. they’re old school so I don’t really think they understand what PPD really is.. and they’re not my own parents so I can’t be myself really..It’s just a lose lose situation for me 😭

I just don’t get to talk about my feelings or act how I need to

Aww sorry, momma. That sounds tough. You deserve to feel safe to be emotionally vulnerable at home and have the support you need. 4 hours isnt too far… maybe your husband could even come visit on weekends if you need a break at your parents house.

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Partner works incredibly long hours, how much do they help out?

I'm struggling. Have been for a while. I've had one break from parenting my daughter, that was for 3 hours in December when I left her with her dad.

She's 14 months old and I'm just tired. I've done every night by myself. He's out of bed at 4am and doesn't get home until 7-9pm. He drives for work, very physically tiring.
On the weekends he was doing 6 days, one weekend day off, but now has both off.

He doesn't sit on the floor and play with her, he doesn't read to her because he says she doesn't have the patience.
He will pick her up and hold her whilst he's cooking.

Recently I've been "snappy" with him.
He got back from the mechanic last weekend, she was getting onto the sofa and he put his headphones on and started to watch Netflix on his phone.
The same day I told him I was going to run her bath and to watch her whilst she was still eating, he fell asleep on the sofa.

Today he went to football after going shopping, so was out 1-3 and then from 4-8.
He got back and I was snappy.

"I don't get why you're so snappy with me"

I said - Probably because I haven't had a break since December.

"Do you think I don't know you haven't had a break. I haven't had a break", "I just won't go to work, I'll sit at home all day".

Then "do you think I like not having a connection to my child"... But that's on him? He never sits to play with her. He "doesn't see the point". He's stated that this age is boring to him.

Since she's been born, he has been to a friend's once a month. Football - He stopped going for 7months, but has been the last two weekends.

Are these not breaks?

He does do the washing/washing up/cooking/vacuuming when I haven't had a chance to; but I'm the one in charge of feeding her, naps/bedtime, teeth brushing, hair brushing, baths, dressing her, making sure she has the right shoes, appointments etc. Everything falls on me.

If your partner works ridiculously long hours, how much do they look after your child? Do you ever get a break?

Am I wrong ?

My daughter’s 1st birthday was Thursday and nobody wished her a happy birthday from her dads family but his mom watched his story. Should I put my foot down and set boundaries for them to accept accountability or should I just let them stay on that side for as long as they want and not worry about it?

Tv good or bad

My 4 month old loves TV shows especially dancing fruits and baby TV is this a good thing or a bad thing at this age?

PPD

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