Inappropriate comment

Hi all,

I’m currently 19 weeks pregnant with my first child and it’s a little girl. My husband and I couldn’t be more excited as we had 2 losses prior. My mother in law has serious issues with boundaries and acts like a total victim if anyone calls her out. Anyways, I could go on and on.

On Monday we were having dinner at their house and we were talking about how many kids we wanted (because they asked). Which I answered that we’d love to have 2 if possible. My MIL then proceeds to tell me, in front of 6 other people, that if we want a boy that my husband and I should have deep penetrative sex around the time of ovulation. My jaw hit the damn floor. It was so uncomfortable. I looked at her and said there’s no science to that and couldn’t even look at her for the rest of the visit. My husband either. There’s this glorification of boys with my MIL and I freaking hate it. All children are special and deserve to be celebrated and loved.

Happy Friday everyone

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yuck 🤢

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Sorry she said that at dinner? I would have thrown my plate at her face. That is not dinner time conversation and it's certainly not a conversation to be had with a mil

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as we were getting our plates together yes. In front of me, her two sons, her 3 year old grandson and her husband. She’s something else

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Man I wish you had called her out of how inappropriate that was, but good on you for calling out the fact that it isn’t scientifically backed.

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Wooooow. 🤯I’m glad you said something, but like mentioned, I definitely would’ve called out just how weird and inappropriate the comment was. Hopefully she never says anything like that again. 😳

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🤢🤢😳

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to be honest I was completely stunned. Historically she always says inappropriate things so this was just another instance. If she does it again I will definitely ask her to stop but she won’t.

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she will whether I said something or not. She doesn’t respect anything anyone asks of her

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yea my mother in law is a unique case. She doesn’t listen or respect boundaries unless you actually raise your voice at her….which I won’t do but my husband has in the past and continues to do so when it’s needed. She has a terrible relationship with her kids because she doesn’t know how to let them be adults. They just say she’s being a “mom” but I’m like no she isn’t lol

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lolololol

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RIGHT. How would she have liked it if I told her that I rode her son like a carnival ride everyday for a week to get pregnant lol

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Ugh I’m so sorry. That’s disgusting that she can speak about her son to you like that. 🤢 She needs serious boundaries. (But like you said, she probably wouldn’t follow them) 🙈 If anything, it makes her look bad. I’m sure everyone there judged her for her comment!

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they all just excuse her behavior. My sister in law and I talk about how insane she is all the time. My sister in law will repeatedly tell her things and text her about certain things and it took our MIL 5 years to acknowledge that they had boundaries. My sister in law was like I’ve basically been talking to a brick wall for 5 years. Its a lot more complicated than just setting boundaries at this point…I wish it were different

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That’s as hilarious as it is inappropriate. I would have said something like “oh right, so the Y chromosome is only passed on through deep penetration?! Right got it thanks” 🤣🤣 mental 🤣

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Wow! No words 🙈

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I'm sure that would defo work!!

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haha I'm sorry I did laugh 🙈 is she often like that? was it a joke or was she being genuinely serious!? 🤣 that's definitely grim to be talking about over dinner though 😬🤣

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true, she probably won’t. But if you call her out on it in front of other people, she may think twice moving forward.

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“I’ll make sure to tell your baby boy we need to incorporate more doggy style in our night time sex routine. Thanks MIL!” 😂

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if she were a normal person I’d say yes this is a great plan but she’s like immune to being embarrassed. It’s insane

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she was 100% serious. She’s one of those moms that will come to our house to walk the dog and like take it upon herself to remove things from our house to wash without telling us. And it’s not like she’s bringing it back the next day, she often waits until we see her next so my husband can be without some clothes for a few days…she oversteps in every way possible. We once hosted them and my parents and instead of socializing with my parents she went into our dryer and folder all my underwear that were in there.

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@Stephanie noooo way!!! not sure what it is with MILs and laundry but they know damn well what they're doing overstepping there 😤 let me guess, she tells you that you're washing/hanging it out wrong 🙃

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I would never speak to her again. Idk why people are so set that you need a boy to be fulfilled in having kids or having one of each gender. I mean I have a boy and a girl but I’m lucky to have them regardless because I had 3 losses after my son, and I didn’t even care what I was having when I found out I was pregnant again. But like the stigma of it man 😅🤮

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I feel that. I do want a boy because my brother and I are very close and I want that for my baby girl, but if we have another girl, she will still be loved the same. (My sister and I have never been close even though we’re closer in age than my brother and I)

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yeah it took a long time for my sister and I to be close. Not until we were older- and I don’t have any brothers. But my sister and I are 5 years apart so it was hard to kinda connect lol. But I get it. I just want healthy babies. My miscarriages really messed me up and just made me super grateful that I was able to at least get the two I have

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my sister and I are three years apart and my brother and I are five years apart. I’m the oldest.
And yeah, I’ve had at least one loss so I’m forever hugging my baby when she reaches for me.

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no she said that “she’s just being helpful”….everything is masked behind her “intention”

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“the way to hell is paved with good intentions. Keep it up and you’ll get there sooner than expected.” 😂

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😂😂

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Hahaha that’s wacky 😂 I guess I am immune to this comments as I also frequently get them myself.

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Is this normal

Let’s say you’re at a softplay with your 2 year old, and some friends & their toddlers.
You buy your 2 year old a kids meal - chicken nuggets, beans, and chips. They’re very happy with it and have almost eaten it all.
They’re sat at the table, fork in hand, consistently eating, and have one chicken nugget left.
Your adult friend comes over from behind you, picks up the last chicken nugget, and eats it.
There was no indication that your child wasn’t going to eat it, and they didn’t ask. They just took it with no warning and ate it right in front of you and your toddler.
How you reacting?

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Are these men ok?

I get so sad seeing all the posts on here daily about women dealing with partners who are treating them horribly. I know it seems over represented because those of us with great partners don’t need to write posts asking for help, but I really hope most of us don’t have these kinds of men in our lives!

I tell my husband about these posts I see sometimes and he’s even shocked by some of the things these guys say/do.

Nobody’s perfect, and every relationship takes work. And becoming parents is a stress test unlike any other for sure, but seeing how many women get stuck in these relationships with men who aren’t interested in being better is so so sad😞

But is/was your partner helpful, loving, and supportive during your pregnancy/PP/etc? Was he a wonderful person but changed for the worst after becoming a parent? Has he put effort into becoming the partner you need him to be, even if he struggles?

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Car issues

Idk if I’m in the wrong. I have a full time job. My husband takes care of the kids while I worked. Today was the day I was supposed to get us a car. But I couldn’t cause of the down payment. So now he’s texting me saying I’m wasting his day to be alone at Walmart so he can spend his tax return. I really want to say go ahead. Leave. Leave the kids and me alone. While you go out and spend money. While your at go ahead and buy urself your drugs and a bitch to go fuck.

Lucky I’m even thinking about him about the car situation if not I would’ve been buying me and the kids a car small enough for us!

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Nursery lunches?

My daughter is nearly 10 months old and starting nursery next month. I want to send my daughter in with lunches so I know shes eating healthy meals but I'm honestly so lost as to what to put in her little bento lunch box that will keep till lunch time and doesnt need reheating. Ive been doing loads of baby led weaning at home, but I tend to make it fresh or pull stuff from the freezer I've previously made and defrost and reheat.
Could you show me some of the lunches you've been giving your baby? Or have you been been letting the nursery deal with the food?

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THIS DUMB 🍑 MF

LET ME BREAK IT DOWN 🤣🤣

THIS MAN DRIVES AN ELECTRIC CAR WHERE HE CAN PLUG HIMSELF IN (NORMALLY DOES TO DO DOORDASH ETC)
AND IT HAD A SPOT TO WIRELESSLY CHARGE
SOME HOW WITH 4 HOURS OF WORKING HE DIDN'T EVEN MAKE 20 BUCKS TO WASH CLOTHS ANOTHER RED FLAG

TWO NIGHTS AGO
HE CLAIMS TO GO OUT TO WORK. HANGS UP ON ME MID CONVERSATION 👀👀

4 HOURS PAST I'M GETTING SLEEPY STILL HAVEN'T HEARD FROM HIM
IT'S LIKE 1:30AM I TEXT HIM NIGHT I'M MAD CONFUSED ALMOST AN HOUR LATER I ANT HEARD FROM HIM SO I CHECK MY TEXT.
THE SHIT SAYS "PHONE OFFLINE" AND SHOWS THE TIME FRAME MY TEXT DIDN'T SEND
SO I START CALLING TO CONFIRM CAUSE I THOUGHT SOMETHING HAPPENED TO HIM. HE'S BEEN IN 2 CAR ACCIDENTS 👀 NEITHER HIS FAULT

SO I GET FRANTIC MY GUY

3:14 ROLLS AROUND I CALL AGAIN SURPRISE HE PICKS UP.
CLAIMS HIS PHONE DIED WHILE HE'S HANGING OUT AND HAVING A VERY "GOOD" CONVERSATION. HE WON'T TELL ME WHERE HE'S AT OR WHO WITH. MIND YOU THIS MAN CHEATED ON ME WHILE I WAS 33 WEEKS PREGNANT.

SO AT THIS POINT I'M PISSED OFF AND I TELL HIM I'M HANGING UP CAUSE I LOOK STUPID BEING WORRIED.

HE TURNS AROUND WHILE NOT BEING AROUND THIS CHICK AND FINALLY TELLS ME ALL THE DETAILS.

BTW YES WE MIGHT BE POLY BUT HE'S POSTED HIMSELF AS SOLO POLY WHILE LIVING WITH ME!! HE THINKS I'M. STUPID WITH ALSO THIS SNEAKY SHIT.

IF I WAS TO DO WHAT HE'S DOING HE'D LOOSE IT.
BUT I'M ABOUT TO GO OUTSIDE!! CAUSE YOU PLAYING IN MY FACE

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Resentment and placing blame on partner

Firstly, please don’t judge me - I’m aware all my thoughts aren’t rational and I do already feel badly about them

I’m finding myself becoming easily frustrated, annoyed, and placing a lot of blame on my partner for many things. Now I’d get it if he was rubbish but he’s not - he has the baby straight away when he gets home from work, he lets me get ready and shower before he goes to work, he pitches in with the chores and gives me any time I ask for off. He doesn’t go out loads either.

I do a lot of the mental labour - realising we need more of and purchasing clothes, milk, groceries, deciding dinner, cooking, cleaning, thinking about what baby needs, etc.

However I just find myself annoyed and blaming him for so many things I find difficult. I know this isn’t fair, but it’s almost like I’m angry that he’s finding it easy and I’m not. Angry if I’ve just got the baby to sleep and he doesn’t think and closes doors to loudly. Angry when he doesn’t dress baby warm enough, or when he puts him in a car seat with a coat on. When he forgets a blanket or doesn’t wash his hands and plays with him. When hes snoring and I’ve just got the baby to drift off.

We have had many conversations and he has tried to take loads off me but it never feels like enough for me to stop being annoyed with him.

Am I experiencing some sort of post partum mental health issues? I find myself upset and crying a lot. any advice would help.

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