Socialising

yeah I definitely feel how you feel honestly it’s the worst feeling I haven’t left the house to meet any of my friends as it always takes hours for me to get my little girl sorted and then also making sure I’ve myself sorted I’ve only left the house with my boyfriend and that’s it most of my friends don’t speak to me no more because of me never being able to get ready in time it’s awful x

What is it that's taking you so long to get out of the house? Is there anything you can streamline?

feeding her, she's a fussy and slow eater, we have to take breaks etc. Then I pump, it's just not possible to do it while she's eating. Then I get her, our bags and myself ready.Then put pram, carrier and whatever else we might need in the car... and bam, two hours have passed. And I still need to reach the destination.

yeah, I'm the first one of my friend group to have a baby and the friendships changed drastically. I slowly stopped being invited to hang outs throughout my pregnancy (who wants to hang out with a tired pregnant lady who can't drink) and then I moved to Australia. We kept in touch for a bit in the beginning but it eventually fizzled out altogether. Now I only do things with my husband, which is great, he's my best friend, but there is still that need for a girlfriend or two.

yeah honestly that’s so true you really just wish you had a friend too even talk to about things and share stuff with but most girls don’t understand how hard it really is when your pregnant and have a child your life changes and you expect them to be there but because they can still drink etc they all feel like we wouldn’t be any fun because we’ve got children but at the end of the day I’m not too bothered about it anymore as I’m happy with my gorgeous little girl madison and my boyfriend I’d rather have my little family than a couple of friends that aren’t really my friends yano

Could you maybe put everything you need in the car the day before? Have the changing bag packed the day before and have yourself ready before the feed. That way you only have to feed and get your baby girl ready?
Does you baby often settles in the car? Because if so, if she starts to cry just put her in the car and drive.
Also maybe you could meet someone when your partner is around, that way he can help you to get the baby ready and get out of the house.

I made it more difficult than needed with my first baby. Now I have 3 (3y, 1y and 5 months) and they're ready to go faster than when I had 1 child 😅

But like Daphne said, try to do as much as possible the night before. Put the stroller in the car, pack your backpack, choose the clothes you and your baby are going to wear, prepare snacks for yourself to take with.

Feed your baby before you leave or if you're running late, feed her when you arrive at your mom/play date (if she's not too hungry of course). Every mom has sympathy when it comes to feeding/napping schedules etc. You can still have conversations while you're feeding your baby.

If you can find a breastfeeding group? Or take the baby to a library group or something, i haven’t seen anyone pumping, but it wouldn’t seem that strange? Then you can just feed baby while you’re out? Get used to going out with baby and some tricks, then see old friends with a bit more confidence? I made a friend at the library and we just go out for coffee and sit and feed wherever.. it’s lovely. Someone to text when they’re little monsters, and we’ve both had to cancel last minute when it just won’t work— and we understand.
Now when I see friends without babies, I have the whole thing pretty streamlined.
Maybe switch the feeds? Pump while you get everything ready then feed while you’re out?
And, if no friend, it’s weird at first, but take yourselves out for a coffee.

Also don't worry if you run 5 or 10 minutes late. I think as mums we all understand that things don't always go to plan :)

Hi guys, thanks for the advice. I don't think I emphasised enough how difficult and lengthy of a battle it is to feed bub. She's teething and refusing to eat, it takes an hour and that's if I'm lucky. So I don't want to feed her in public, it's stressful enough at home.
I do go out by myself for walks every day and do stuff with my husband when he's not at work. It's much easier when we're on our time and don't have a 'deadline'. We do occasionally go to library rhyme time but so far none of the mums I approached have seemed interested in moving past small talk.
Pumping - I only have a non portable pump and, as a just-about-enougher, I massage my breasts for a better milk output. So I can't really do anything else for those 25ish min.
Getting dressed and packing stuff is not the time consuming part.
For whoever said 'get a separate car', I had a big chuckle. Some of us don't have that luxury, unfortunately.
Anyway, I think I'll just leave it be until bub is a bit more cooperative.

sorry, got confused by the comma, guess it was a typo. Makes more sense now!

"have separate car COMMA pram" reads like you're suggesting to have a separate car AND pram. "Have separate car pram" reads as a pram which you keep in the car. So, it was either a typo for which I apologised for misreading or you were indeed suggesting to have a separate car to what I said is a luxury and you got offended. But apologising offended you too so I am at a loss. I wasn't being malicious, it was a misunderstanding to which I admitted my half of the blame. Take care.

I'm sorry feeding takes so long. What I've noticed is when they get older they feed less, so maybe she's not that hungry?