in

England

Emotionally spent.

I’ve gone back and forth about whether or not to post on here about the way I’m feeling, but here goes…
I’m 6 nearly 7 weeks pregnant unplanned (I’ve spent most my adult life believing I was unable to have children). I was in a ten year relationship up until last year with someone who wanted nothing but a family! When it became clear (so I thought) I wasn’t able to give him that! We split and I moved to the other side of the country! It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done, and honestly broke me I spent months crying and mourning the life I’d lost! By the start of this year I was finally coming to terms with it and accepted that a family and everything else was not something I was going to have or needed anymore and made peace with it! I decided I wanted to travel and enjoy my life alone! I met my now boyfriend(he is very supportive of whatever happens), who was fully aware of my situation and how I felt about ‘life’ but we were happy to be together as-long as I was living in this part of the country and that was that really! Anyway fast forward I’m pregnant and I’ve never felt so all over the place! I have moments where I feel like I don’t even know my own mind! Or what I want anymore! I don’t know what I want or expect from this post I just needed to get it of my chest, to anyone who might be feeling the same! I know this isn’t really the place for women with doubts but I know pregnancy is a very emotional time anyway, and just wonder if there’s anyone else who is feeling overwhelmed by it all!
I’m sorry if any women who’ve struggled to get pregnant, find this post offensive of hurtful in anyway!