Self settling. Non cry it out.

So yes I am aware that not all babies can before you start.
I’ve never tried with my LB as he’s always fallen asleep either on the bottle or being rocked.

Now not that I’m desperate for him to self settle as I do love the cuddles.

However tonight has been a nightmare. Yes it’s warm so that won’t help. He’s also teething.

He had calpol but it didn’t seem to touch it at all.
Then it was an hour in so I gave him a few sips of water to see if he was warm to cool him down. Also had ibuprofen as he was crying his little eyes out every way I tried to settle him.

He’s now just in his nappy and finally fallen asleep but I feel it was out of exhaustion because he’s pretty much cried for an hour and a half as I’ve rocked him, patted him in his cot. Everything.

So my question is I hate to see my LB cry (preemie babies don’t really cry more whine, so when he cries it actually breaks my heart)

How long do you leave them in their cot to try self settle WITHOUT them crying. Do you stay in the room the whole time? I tried a couple of times as I got too hot and he was tossing and turning, shaking his head from side to side, all his tired sign but then just burst into tears. 🥺

It broke my heart to see him get like that. I don’t know if he was too hot, his teeth are bothering him. He wasn’t hungry as I’d tried a bottle about 10 minutes before and he pushed it away.


Sorry I feel really stupid as I never really wanted to ‘sleep train’ as I WILL NOT let my baby cry themselves to sleep when I can be there for him. I just don’t actually know if he can self settle or not as he’s usually been pretty good but the heat and his teeth have proper thrown us both.

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I would say if he's too hot and teeth are bugging him now is not the time to see if he can self settle.
I would try self settling on the first nap of the day. They're generally the easiest 😊

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he did look like he was trying too bless him but I just ilthi k it was all bothering him at once and as soon as I took his vest off after a small cuddle to see if he’d settle he did fall asleep ish in my arms then stayed asleep this time.
I’ll give it a go on a nap/a cooler day too.

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I dont believe in 100% cry it out.

First we do our bedtime routine (bath, book, lullaby) then I try to lay him down awake and tired. I may pat his back for a minute occasionally but then I leave. If he starts to cry, I'll wait about 10 minutes then reevaluate. If he is just whining, I'll leave him be. But if he is clearly getting more upset or screaming, I'll go in and help him settle a bit. I always try to limit to just patting his back and not picking him up because picking him up makes him think it's play time.

I dont do a strict cry-it-out because a screaming baby is NOT going to calm down on their own or self soothe.

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You could try a dummy to help him self soothe at night? That’s what I’ve started to do. It works.

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I should of mentioned that, he’s a thumb sucker so just throws a funny out so he can suck his thumb instead. He used to get on with a dummy and they really helped until he found his hands. He’s great at doing it during the night if he stirs a little.

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