Am I a bad mother.

So sorry to hear you are feeling this way. Just wanted to share the link to this page full of links for helplines https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/guides-to-support-and-services/crisis-services/helplines-listening-services/

I’m sorry to hear this. I have no idea what it is like to live with a chronic painful illness so don’t feel equipped to advise on that or what medication you should think about taking.
But I can say rock bottom is a very real place to be, but things will get better! Your life and your baby’s life are worth fighting for. I’m sure all the hormones and symptoms of pregnancy on top of your illness are making you feel mentally and physically worse than usual. But when the time comes and you have your baby in your arms you’ll feel that little twinkle come back again.
Stay strong girlie and keep talking to people xx

Remember this period you're going through won't last for ever, you will look back on it one day and be proud of yourself for getting through it. Don't label yourself as a bad mum because you are doing your very best and it is so hard, especially with a chronic illness to contend with. Look at everything you have already done such as reaching out to your doctor and voicing your thoughts on here. This page on mind might be https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/postnatal-depression-and-perinatal-mental-health/support-and-services/ keep advocating for yourself and your health xx

I can’t really say it’s the same thing, but I’ve been put on Sertraline for my mental health and was told by the doctors my baby is likely to have withdrawals and stuff when he’s born, but they also said the benefits of me taking it out weigh the negatives. It’s not amazing but I hope that helps a little x

I know it’s not the same medication but I had the same turmoil with sertraline when I was pregnant, I was really against the idea and thought I could push through without it but towards labour time the stress, anxiety, depressive and suicidal thoughts got so bad my partner had to step in and explain that my daughter needed her mother so I had to do what I needed to, to make sure I was there to be the mum I wanted to be. I don’t know if this is the same for you but please, do what’s best for you to ensure you can be the mum you want to be. You’re not a bad mum, a bad mum wouldn’t post something like this, you have thought about your baby first and that’s something only a great mum could do give yourself credit x