I think I wanna walk tf away and never look back

I’m so tired of the people in my life and wish I would’ve made better choices when it comes to selecting who I married and had kids with and just should’ve mapped my life out differently. I had my first child at 19 by myself, my child’s father didn’t help and was incarcerated.. ended up meeting my husband and thought he was this phenomenal guy and had our children. He turned out the complete opposite. He’s lazy as fuck, he is a part time father, he doesn’t cater to my needs.. his excuse is that he works? Okay and? I work too, I stand on my feet most times for 10 hrs at a warehouse, be a full time mom, clean up after a dog, clean up after kids and his overgrown ass, rip and run kids to point A to point B, set up doctor appointments, dentist appointments, do the whole 9. My husband don’t do none of that shit but only a few times like drop them off twice in a week to school while I do every fucking thing. I have to always worry about who’s going to watch them while we work, I’m trying to go back to school and had to postpone me going over a dozen times because I have to worry about who’s going to watch them while he can work how he wants to work and does whatever the fuck he wants to do. It has gotten to the point where I verbally curse him the fuck out and put my hands on him because I keep voicing how stressed out I am and you’ll think a motherfucker would listen and try to relieve my stress but he’s the main reason why I’m stressed. He’s just a sorry ass excuse of a husband. God forbid if I die and this motherfucker gets left with the kids, he can’t even take care of them on his own while I’m here now. His relatives don’t help do shit, they just waiting on me to make an exit or die and that’s when they’ll help. I’ll rather just go through the courts, file a divorce and the courts will make his ass responsible for them because I’m tired of doing shit on my own. I work, bust my ass, come home to a nasty ass house, no cooked meal, none of that and I don’t cheat or do shit but work and home. I deserve the upmost respect and to at least have a man who’s going to value me. He don’t even get me shit for Mother’s Day, anniversary, none of that shit. I haven’t had a propers Mother’s Day or shit in years. Nothing… I’m tired of this bs ass life. I should’ve put myself first and not even took no chance on his ass and focused on me and living my fucking life. I have insomnia and can’t even fucking rest and relax.

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I’m in the same boat if you wanna chat I’m here my number is 1 (646) 241-5101 my name is Charlene. Hang in there I know exactly how you feel and I wish things would be better

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I’ve felt some, if not all, of this at some point. Are you looking to vent, or do you want some advice?

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I’ve felt the same way you are feeling and it ended up in a divorce all I can say to you is never settle for anything less than you deserve because momma you deserve the world not having to take care of your children and a grown ass man child. Momma your already doing everything on your own why not set yourself up to go through the courts and just leave. I know it’s easier said than done but it’s so worth it and for your mental health. All he is doing is bringing you down.

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I felt all of this but I will say stop putting your hands on that man because if the shoe was on the other foot, he would be in jail. Or you would be twice as hurt. You’re tired then leave ! Both of us need to come up with a schedule that easies the stress between you both. I have a lazy baby father and sometimes I be wanting to pop him in the head with something but I reframe from doing it. But if you got to the point of putting your hands on him, ya gonna move from each other.

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I am sorry you are going through this. I am in the same boat and preparing to divorce. If you need to vent or just need a listening ear, you can message me anytime

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wtf moment?

I have been going back and forth with my husband lately. Well not lately it’s been years. He is the best husband and father you could ask for; for two weeks. Then he’s inconsistent. It drives me mad. Then he’s back to husband and dad of the year , then back to same inconsistency. I talked to him about this last night and he said “if i was lovey dovey and acted like this all the time you’d get bored and cheat on me.”

Ok so for starters i know some of you are going to say omg omg omg super controlling omg leave omg. No im not doing that. Im happy he finally admitted his wrong doing and taking accountability for it but id like to know the deeper reason, the what the f has him thinking like this reason, the personality trait reason. He’s obviously scared I’m going to leave him; so much so that he’s doing this dumb shit to prevent it. Past trauma? What do y’all think I can do to get him to see I’m not going anywhere? I’m consistent already, I married him, we have a baby. He really is the love of my life. I have never loved another man like this before.. but this shit is for the birds and he thinks he’s keeping me doing this but in actuality it’s making me lose respect and detach.

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8

worried about a family members baby

So this child is three months old and she isn’t being fed from 10pm till 6/7 am idk if this is normal or safe and it’s been like this since 2 months i believe as she won’t wake her for feeds she goes to the pub drinking most nights with her baby and her baby has already been in hospital with a very low temperature bc she was outside but as soon as she was in a warm car she warmed up and doctors said she was fine she lets cats play with her bouncers toys that go over her and doesn’t strap her in she is cold from what i’ve heard from other family members and they’ve tried to warm her hands and she’s wet herself at my parents and she hasn’t had a spare vest to put on her and i offered her a blanket as she didn’t have one and she declined and she won’t listen to anyone about it she’s already left the baby with my parents for the night to go out drinking and personally i couldn’t leave my three month old because my parents said she just cried and im really unsure whether to report her or not and her house smells of dog wee/poo as she’s never home to look after them and that’s not safe for the baby i understand being lonely but she doesn’t need to go to the pub every night her friends could
go
to hers or her she could go to a cafe that has closed doors not sat outside a cold pub and it’s a bit of a rough pub in my opinion

my parents are concerned btw but they say i shouldn’t report her as it’s not fair but i feel how the baby is treated isn’t fair

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17

Does anyone else hate their partner?

I’m now a little over 2 months postpartum and I’ve struggled with genuinely just not liking my partner anymore since we found out I was pregnant last year. I catch myself just staring at him with hatred because I’m so sick and tired of his bullshit. He is just now getting a job and has not had one since THANKSGIVING!!! Meanwhile I was working full time until I finally got too sick to be able to work. I genuinely want him out of my house but I depend on him as far as driving goes bc I don’t have a car. I also still love him deep down and don’t want to put him out on the street but he’s driving me genuinely insane. Any advice?

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12

Heartbreak

After years of trying, months of back and fourth on the fate of our marriage, indecision, fights. The whole enchilada my husband and I are separating, divorcing. Whatever. I'm so goddamn heart broken. I feel like it's a death and I'm in mourning. We have a 3 year old son and currently and for the foreseeable we are going to coparent and live together. This makes things harder because neither one of us can really move on but it's how it is. He understands and he's trying to heal too. But I can't understand why now that things are over he can be kind. He's been more amazing in the last week since I ended things than ever. Why couldn't he do that when we were together for years I begged for change, we saw a counselor I tried everything and he just wouldn't. Now he seems to turn a switch and be able to just do it all. But it's too late. My heart aches. My body aches. Love sucks.

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3

Partner works incredibly long hours, how much do they help out?

I'm struggling. Have been for a while. I've had one break from parenting my daughter, that was for 3 hours in December when I left her with her dad.

She's 14 months old and I'm just tired. I've done every night by myself. He's out of bed at 4am and doesn't get home until 7-9pm. He drives for work, very physically tiring.
On the weekends he was doing 6 days, one weekend day off, but now has both off.

He doesn't sit on the floor and play with her, he doesn't read to her because he says she doesn't have the patience.
He will pick her up and hold her whilst he's cooking.

Recently I've been "snappy" with him.
He got back from the mechanic last weekend, she was getting onto the sofa and he put his headphones on and started to watch Netflix on his phone.
The same day I told him I was going to run her bath and to watch her whilst she was still eating, he fell asleep on the sofa.

Today he went to football after going shopping, so was out 1-3 and then from 4-8.
He got back and I was snappy.

"I don't get why you're so snappy with me"

I said - Probably because I haven't had a break since December.

"Do you think I don't know you haven't had a break. I haven't had a break", "I just won't go to work, I'll sit at home all day".

Then "do you think I like not having a connection to my child"... But that's on him? He never sits to play with her. He "doesn't see the point". He's stated that this age is boring to him.

Since she's been born, he has been to a friend's once a month. Football - He stopped going for 7months, but has been the last two weekends.

Are these not breaks?

He does do the washing/washing up/cooking/vacuuming when I haven't had a chance to; but I'm the one in charge of feeding her, naps/bedtime, teeth brushing, hair brushing, baths, dressing her, making sure she has the right shoes, appointments etc. Everything falls on me.

If your partner works ridiculously long hours, how much do they look after your child? Do you ever get a break?

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10

Am I wrong ?

My daughter’s 1st birthday was Thursday and nobody wished her a happy birthday from her dads family but his mom watched his story. Should I put my foot down and set boundaries for them to accept accountability or should I just let them stay on that side for as long as they want and not worry about it?

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7

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