If you have a playdate for a 8/9 year old do you expect the other child to follow the rules at your house? What do you do if they don’t?

Ok so here it goes idk who to ask this question or if anyone will even have an answer but my child had a playdate today with a friend and the little girl apparently got in front of my boyfriends face and was very loud and was hitting him with a pillow because she wanted to play. My boyfriend got pretty upset at this and asked the little girl to stop and why she was being mean to him, the little girl said that’s what her big brother does to her lol. She didn’t stop, he raIsed his voice and even said the F word to the little girl and then proceeded to remove himself from the situation after I stepped in. Any way I feel SUPER embarrassed and sorry for the little girl I think she just wanted attention. I need to talk to my boyfriend about the situation but idk what to even say. Like is this even normal? I guess this is actually 2 questions in 1, what would you do?

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I wouldn’t expect them to follow all of the rules in some cases because everyone does have different parenting styles and rules and we have to remember that other people’s children are not our children and our home rules are set for our children. But that still does not mean that other people’s children can come up into your home and be disrespectful. And I think that as long as they have a basic sense and understanding of respect for people and their things then that’s okay. But I wouldn’t expect them to follow set in stone rules that my children abide by.

this is my thoughts exactly. I guess it was really bothering me because after he left my child was pretty stirred up about why my boyfriend yelled and flipped out at his friend. Like yes she was disrespectful but at the same time he also overreacted. I definitely would let the child know what they are doing is disrespectful but not yelling and cussing at the child. I don’t want my children’s house to be that house their friends don’t go to because they have mean/strict parents.

Your boyfriend needs to control himself, especially when the child told him that her brother does that to her. The only option left after that comment is to stand up, walk away, and let you know so you can speak to her mother about the behavior

I would have gently taken the pillow and said that it isn’t nice to hit people with pillows when they ask you to stop. Your boyfriend is in the wrong for yelling at the child. To her it was a game.

where were the friend/girl’s parents? I wouldn’t have a play date without the parent being there and vise versa. Maybe I’m just paranoid but I don’t trust ANYBODY. Especially with how outburstive your bf is… she’s only 8 years old. Yes, doesn’t mean she can be disrespectful in your home but again.. he can have better self control and not cuss at a 8 year old. Just my two cents, not everyone will agree with me and that’s fine too 🤷🏻‍♀️

It's really sad todays world. Kids have no respect, no boundaries, no goals or ambition. You're not crazy, your boyfriend isn't crazy, that child unfortunately thinks they can act like that. & They aren't 2-4 aged toddler like I felt reading that anxiety inducing post😬🤣💖 I will hangout with the mom & our daughters first before allowing a friend over. Recently had one of my daughters daycare friends over for 4 hours💖 they are 3.5 years old. But me & her mom parent very similar. It was perfect. VS my husbands coworkers oldest daughter is 4 &.. idk how to say this lightly, horrible. Absolutely rude. Tells my daughter to go away so we only all hangout together. I.e. going to a BBQ & family party at their house tomorrow & probably hang late night with our kids. The difference I've found is kids who have tablets or phones VS conscious parents like myself who don't allow that. We watch tv together if we watch tv & we dont watch tv every day

What's sad is that child is lacking major life skills already. She's lacking social emotional development she didn't receive. & That's all I'll elaborate on lol

in our community

wtf moment?

I have been going back and forth with my husband lately. Well not lately it’s been years. He is the best husband and father you could ask for; for two weeks. Then he’s inconsistent. It drives me mad. Then he’s back to husband and dad of the year , then back to same inconsistency. I talked to him about this last night and he said “if i was lovey dovey and acted like this all the time you’d get bored and cheat on me.”

Ok so for starters i know some of you are going to say omg omg omg super controlling omg leave omg. No im not doing that. Im happy he finally admitted his wrong doing and taking accountability for it but id like to know the deeper reason, the what the f has him thinking like this reason, the personality trait reason. He’s obviously scared I’m going to leave him; so much so that he’s doing this dumb shit to prevent it. Past trauma? What do y’all think I can do to get him to see I’m not going anywhere? I’m consistent already, I married him, we have a baby. He really is the love of my life. I have never loved another man like this before.. but this shit is for the birds and he thinks he’s keeping me doing this but in actuality it’s making me lose respect and detach.

Divorced at 5 months PP

My husband just divorced me yesterday.

I'm 5 months post partum and I feel like complete shit. I literally can't stop crying and I don't feel like eating and this whole week my milk supply has gone down due to stress and not eating. What helps with milk supply?

The divorce- on Monday at 5am me and my husband had a small argument on text. It was regarding him not catering to my love language. I sent him a video on how women shouldn't have to ask and how laziness can kill a relationship. We've had many arguments regarding this prior about him not catering to my love language and he doesn't buy me flowers or doesn't think of me. Anyways this night, he text me saying he doesn't do Mother's Day and all that, he doesn't want to buy me flowers because my sisters buy me flowers and he can't be arsed with my moods. He said I've not been his peace and said he's done.
I replied "okay. All I want is for you to appreciate me and love me as your wife and mother of your child. I'm not pushing you away, I'm begging you to love me etc etc. I'm done too."

I come home from my errands that morning and he's upped and left. He took all of his belongings, clothes, drawer, tv- everything.

He didn't ring or text me or anything.

The property is in my name and as he left and didn't leave the key, I changed the locks the next day. I feel this is what pushed him over the edge.

He officially divorced me on Saturday.
I'm 5 months post partum and I have a 5 year old from my ex partner too.

I just want to talk about it with someone that's not biased. Was I asking for too much? I feel he just didn't want to be with me anymore and used this as an excuse? Or is that me overthinking....
Input would be nice xoxo

worried about a family members baby

So this child is three months old and she isn’t being fed from 10pm till 6/7 am idk if this is normal or safe and it’s been like this since 2 months i believe as she won’t wake her for feeds she goes to the pub drinking most nights with her baby and her baby has already been in hospital with a very low temperature bc she was outside but as soon as she was in a warm car she warmed up and doctors said she was fine she lets cats play with her bouncers toys that go over her and doesn’t strap her in she is cold from what i’ve heard from other family members and they’ve tried to warm her hands and she’s wet herself at my parents and she hasn’t had a spare vest to put on her and i offered her a blanket as she didn’t have one and she declined and she won’t listen to anyone about it she’s already left the baby with my parents for the night to go out drinking and personally i couldn’t leave my three month old because my parents said she just cried and im really unsure whether to report her or not and her house smells of dog wee/poo as she’s never home to look after them and that’s not safe for the baby i understand being lonely but she doesn’t need to go to the pub every night her friends could
go
to hers or her she could go to a cafe that has closed doors not sat outside a cold pub and it’s a bit of a rough pub in my opinion

my parents are concerned btw but they say i shouldn’t report her as it’s not fair but i feel how the baby is treated isn’t fair

Forgiving a partner…

Long story short - found out 2 months ago my partner of almost 10 years has slept with two girls, one of which he’s been seeing for 8 months - during this time I was pregnant with our third child and gave birth. (She had an abortion)
I found out, he cut all ties (still works with her)
I want to try and move on from this, we have three children , and a home… I can’t face the idea of being without my children half the time. I want to try and make things work. But I can’t stop the intrusive thoughts / images of the two of them together…. Any advice if you’ve been in a similar situation?
Sick of feeling this rubbish, also 5 month pp so hormones/confidence is in pieces😣😣😣

Does anyone else hate their partner?

I’m now a little over 2 months postpartum and I’ve struggled with genuinely just not liking my partner anymore since we found out I was pregnant last year. I catch myself just staring at him with hatred because I’m so sick and tired of his bullshit. He is just now getting a job and has not had one since THANKSGIVING!!! Meanwhile I was working full time until I finally got too sick to be able to work. I genuinely want him out of my house but I depend on him as far as driving goes bc I don’t have a car. I also still love him deep down and don’t want to put him out on the street but he’s driving me genuinely insane. Any advice?

Heartbreak

After years of trying, months of back and fourth on the fate of our marriage, indecision, fights. The whole enchilada my husband and I are separating, divorcing. Whatever. I'm so goddamn heart broken. I feel like it's a death and I'm in mourning. We have a 3 year old son and currently and for the foreseeable we are going to coparent and live together. This makes things harder because neither one of us can really move on but it's how it is. He understands and he's trying to heal too. But I can't understand why now that things are over he can be kind. He's been more amazing in the last week since I ended things than ever. Why couldn't he do that when we were together for years I begged for change, we saw a counselor I tried everything and he just wouldn't. Now he seems to turn a switch and be able to just do it all. But it's too late. My heart aches. My body aches. Love sucks.