Losing Hope for My Marriage

I am losing hope that my marriage is salvageable with each passing day.

Last night I had a vulnerable conversation with how I feel unappreciated and unloved with my husband. Today showed me that nothing stuck in his head because I had to get the kids ready and out the door all by myself while they threw tantrums and where was he? He was playing a f*cking video game.

So tonight I had a (one sided) conversation about not feeling heard and being blatantly ignored, his response? None, he changed topic, didn’t acknowledge anything I said, blatantly ignoring me……again.

I would rather be a single parent because I’m already doing everything on my own. The only difference would be that I’d save myself from being angry all day every day because I’m staring at a man who can see I’m doing everything alone and not care.

I’m miserable. I love him, but I’m not in love with him anymore. Why is it that you only see a man’s true colours after you’ve had kids with him. I don’t regret my children at all, just regret trusting their father to be a better man than this, just regret committing myself to him.

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I’m struggling with this right now :(
I hope that you find peace in the situation! I think it’s bc men aren’t as strong as we are bc the second I leave the house and he watches our son, he’s calling me about everything. I love them but dang we need a break!!! Video games have been a big issue with us as well. He stays on them all the time. I really hope you guys can figure it out. ❤️

Throw the video games out. That will make him listen

I left mine. I’m happier for it

Same here. Video games. My husband asked me yesterday why I'm so angry all the time, and I didn't answer.....because I've said what's wrong multiple times and he doesn't listen.

I'm sorry I don't have any advice

that was our first conversation was. It was a back and forth discussion and he said he wanted to be better for me. I told him I wasn’t in love and that we had issues that needed to be fixed and he said he wanted to fix it. But the next day was like that conversation never happened, so that’s when I told him I felt ignored and he didn’t answer me.

it’s so frustrating. Just the other day I was trying to take a nap because my sleep has been crap and my husband literally walked past the fridge to ask me if I had any pumped milk for the baby. He physically walked past the fridge where he easily could have looked himself to disturb me trying to fulfill a basic need in order to function

Well, he’s definitely showing you over and over how life is going to be with him. Can’t make him do better if he doesn’t want to. You have to either accept his behaviour and how life is now, or tap out. I went through this with my ex husband. In my experience, it’s much easier being a single parent

I'm in the same boat he does nothing in the house even though we agreed we'd split finances 60/40 so it's only fair the chores do too. But all he does is takes the bins out and that's after me reminding him all the time and sometimes even taking them out. I've had covid and he's not helped one bit so I'm here with a sick child whilst I'm sick too. I do it all myself. If I could afford the house and car myself I'd tell him to leave but I can't and I'm tied in to the car unless I suffer a 5k loss which I do not have :(

in our community

Family culture difference on money

Sorry this is long, I hope some of you get to the end and give advice!!!

So I’m a very thrifty person, things are tight at the moment, the cost of living crisis and my house is heated by oil so things are extortionate. We aren’t on the bread line but we aren’t flush, hubby might be made redundant so there is some financial pressure.

Sometimes I buy my sons something nicer, on the justification that I can sell it on after (♥️ vinted ♥️). I have also been planning on pretty much breaking even most of the baby things I bought from face book market place, side by crib, baby changing unit, etc.

Hubby and I have different money cultures with our families (he’s Indian, I’m British). I’m my family we don’t mix money, we would help each other out if someone was in trouble and will get each other gifts on special occasions. With hubby’s family money is much more fluid, they will give each other things worth thousands of £ just because.

Hubby’s brother bought him a new laptop and a new Google phone, he’s been very generous to hubby. Hubby hasn’t given the same back because brother is much richer.

Hubby and I mostly share finances. If it’s relevant I’m the higher earner.

Now to the point! My babies are so cute they’ve given hubby’s brother (currently single) baby rabies. He’s asked for our baby stuff when we’re done with it. He’s been so generous to hubby I feel really stingy saying no. But I’d never have bought some of the stuff if I wasn’t going to get a return on it - the thought makes me a bit anxious. If we gave all our baby stuff given the second hand value it still wouldn’t equal what the brother had given hubby.

I thought maybe I could give him some stuff but sell some stuff, but hubby said then his brother will just have to go out and buy that stuff, so I should name my price and ask his brother for the money. That makes me feel very uncomfortable, given how generous the brother has been to hubby.

So what do I do ladies? Give it all and suck it up? Give part of it and sell parts on Vinted/FB, or ask hubbys brother for money for it and be uncomfortable? Or do you see another solution?

No one is being entitled or rude here, just a culture difference I need to navigate.

My relationship is failing I feel so alone.. I need a girlfriend to talk to :(

I'm a sahm and I feel so stuck... anyone going through the same thing? I could really use someone to relate to and talk through this with. Feeling so vulnerable but if I don't I won't be able to pull myself out of this

Going back to work!

Already thinking about this! Told my boss I was pregnant this week at 10 weeks, he was so happy for me. He’s recently became a first time Dad and was showing me pictures of his baby. I told him my plans about going back after 6 months and he looked at me like I was mad, am I!? I absolutely love my job and cannot imagine giving it up, I manage a team and am petrified my position won’t be there if I had a year off. My husband gets 6 months full pay so the plan would be for him to have the last 6 months off and I also made it clear to my boss that I would like to go part time. That way we can hopefully parent together 4/7 days rather than just the weekend! I am such an overthinking! 🤣 but this is what I’m struggling with the most, I’ve worked full time since I was 17 (12 years ago) and the max time I’ve had off in one go is 2 weeks when I got married. I’m sooo excited to be a Mum and we decided now was the right time, which it 100% is! But I feel so on edge about not working! I’m sure once I’m on maternity leave I won’t even think about work! Has anyone else felt the same?

What are we giving our soon-to-be 3yo for their birthdays?

We have the magnetiles, we have the kinetic sand and play doh, we have the play kitchen…

Literally, is there anything left in the world to buy this spoilt kid? 😅

Go to dinner ideas

Looking for recipes you use in your family that are not the traditional lasagna, shepards pie, ect

Is it just me?

I’m 35. I have a 21 month old and i’m 5 months pregnant. I have no friends. Everyone has either drifted away or ghosted me. I don’t know what i’ve done but i’m so lonely now. My best friend of 20 years has ghosted me and i’m heartbroken. I’ve tried to reach out to other friends but never get anywhere. I don’t know how to make new friends. I honestly just feel so alone.