Overbearing mother in law

Does anyone else have an overbearing mother in law? My baby is now four months old and ever since we have had her my husbands mother is constantly asking us questions and trying to see her. I’m not kidding when I say we have seen her ever single week since our baby has been born. It is hard because my mother in law is hyper sensitive and you cannot lay down boundaries without her getting extremely angry and upset and play victim (which makes us want to see her less) she only talks really about herself when we see her too and never asks really how we are. Plus she will also take my daughter out of my hands without asking.(the worst was when she was two weeks old and I was feeding her and said she could hold her after I burp her and she took her out of my hands and said “I’ll do it!!!” 😡) I’m getting to my boiling point and I have no idea how to deal with it anymore. It’s not just me too her other kids have expressed she does the same thing to them when it comes to wanting to hang out. My husband and I are at a loss of how to navigate this anymore. How do you guys deal with this if you’re in the same boat?

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Oh my fking God.
I would legit send her a message on how you feel and cut ties until she’s ready to respect your boundaries.
I had a mother in law like this but after my baby was born I was Not about to deal with that shit.
SHE NEEDS TO GROW UP.

That’s rough. I would just lay down some boundaries/ground rules (lovingly), make sure she knows what they are and what the consequences of crossing them are (limiting how often she can see you for example), and if she gets mad she gets mad. She’s an adult. Easier said than done, and obviously I don’t know all the nuances of the situation, but family acting like that because they think they can just cause they’re family drive me crazy. And make sure your husband is on the same page with whatever you do. Would recommend reading the book Boundaries by Henry Cloud if you’re into reading. Sorry you have to deal with that. ❤️

And I guess just decide between you and your husband how often you would like to see her and then just stick to that.

Don’t you be afraid to put your foot down! No more weekly visits bc you cannot trust her to respect your boundaries. She can be a victim. Victim of the consequences of her own actions.

Lay down the boundaries and do not worry about being “nice” about it. This sounds like the type of woman you have to be firm with, or else she will completely disregard you. Whatever boundaries you lay down, make sure to follow them yourself (for example: if she does something you’ve asked her not to do, immediately ask her to leave). It won’t be easy but you must enforce your own boundaries or else she will never respect them. Sorry you’re going through this, sounds infuriating. I would explode on this woman lol.

Thanks guys! I have had my husband set boundaries with her cause my therapist suggested since she’s his mom he should do it. But she obviously has not stuck to it so I think it may be time I do it. I’m not scared of confrontation really but I just don’t wanna deal with how annoying I know she will be 😭 but alas it seems necessary at this point

100% necessary. Good luck!

You need to space yourself from her if she wont respect your boundaries. Sorry you’re dealing with is.

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