Am I a bad mum?

Is anyone else looking forward to going back to work? I’m 4mths pp and I honestly can’t wait to go back to work. Don’t get me wrong I love my little girl with all my heart but I’ve found myself really missing being able to go to work. I don’t know if it’s because bub is EBF and I’ve been doing 90% of everything with bub and the house and I don’t get much time to myself. I have found that I’m at times resenting my partner as his life has not changed as much as mine has and I find myself kinda grieving my old life. And due to this it’s making me want to go back to work earlier than planned to get a little bit of me back.

I don’t know what I really want/need from this. Maybe to feel like I’m not alone?

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You are NOT a bad mum, I do understand your situation, when you become a mum your life is just about your baby 24/7, going to work means a “break” so you can spend time with people, you can think in more stuffs not just about your baby, etc… so I think is pretty normal to be honest, I love my baby too and i dont miss my job but i miss go out and socialise with ny colleagues and you know things like this…. So dont feel bad and if your decision is coming back to work earlier just do it, anyway in this country they give you 1 year maternity in mine is just 4 months so…

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I love my job and I miss it so much as my role had to change when I was pregnant so I haven’t done my real job for nearly a year now

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the longest ‘break’ I’ve been able to have in the last 4mths is 3x 45min slots where I’ve gone to get my eyebrows done. My bub refuses all bottles so relies on me entirely for food which has been harder than expected. I miss having to use my brain in a way if that makes sense have to problem solve.

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Not at all! I had a few kit days in the summer last year and I came home every day refreshed after a 12 hour day in the salon and absolutely loved it I was sad when it ended as even though I talked about my son non stop I was so grateful to go back to being just me not mum me just me and be able to relax without worrying about when was a last bottle etc xx

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yeah my shift will be 12+ hrs and I know you lo miss her like crazy it would be amazing ot having to think about that stuff

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No you’re not, being a mum is a 24/7 job and it takes the life out of you. I can imagine even more so when EBF. Please be easy on yourself my love, you’re doing a great job. Better + easier times ahead 🤍

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I just wish that my partner understood how hard it is

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Divorced at 5 months PP

My husband just divorced me yesterday.

I'm 5 months post partum and I feel like complete shit. I literally can't stop crying and I don't feel like eating and this whole week my milk supply has gone down due to stress and not eating. What helps with milk supply?

The divorce- on Monday at 5am me and my husband had a small argument on text. It was regarding him not catering to my love language. I sent him a video on how women shouldn't have to ask and how laziness can kill a relationship. We've had many arguments regarding this prior about him not catering to my love language and he doesn't buy me flowers or doesn't think of me. Anyways this night, he text me saying he doesn't do Mother's Day and all that, he doesn't want to buy me flowers because my sisters buy me flowers and he can't be arsed with my moods. He said I've not been his peace and said he's done.
I replied "okay. All I want is for you to appreciate me and love me as your wife and mother of your child. I'm not pushing you away, I'm begging you to love me etc etc. I'm done too."

I come home from my errands that morning and he's upped and left. He took all of his belongings, clothes, drawer, tv- everything.

He didn't ring or text me or anything.

The property is in my name and as he left and didn't leave the key, I changed the locks the next day. I feel this is what pushed him over the edge.

He officially divorced me on Saturday.
I'm 5 months post partum and I have a 5 year old from my ex partner too.

I just want to talk about it with someone that's not biased. Was I asking for too much? I feel he just didn't want to be with me anymore and used this as an excuse? Or is that me overthinking....
Input would be nice xoxo

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7

Partner is giving me the silent treatment

So I was struggling with my postpartum anxiety bad yesterday. My partner and I was out for drinks with family. He kept making jokes about treating me a bit shit.
Which no one thought was funny. I am usually quite patient about him using me as his jokes, but yesterday it hurt.

When we got home I told him it made me feel disrespected. Now he is giving me the cold fat shoulder?! What do I do ?

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14

wtf moment?

I have been going back and forth with my husband lately. Well not lately it’s been years. He is the best husband and father you could ask for; for two weeks. Then he’s inconsistent. It drives me mad. Then he’s back to husband and dad of the year , then back to same inconsistency. I talked to him about this last night and he said “if i was lovey dovey and acted like this all the time you’d get bored and cheat on me.”

Ok so for starters i know some of you are going to say omg omg omg super controlling omg leave omg. No im not doing that. Im happy he finally admitted his wrong doing and taking accountability for it but id like to know the deeper reason, the what the f has him thinking like this reason, the personality trait reason. He’s obviously scared I’m going to leave him; so much so that he’s doing this dumb shit to prevent it. Past trauma? What do y’all think I can do to get him to see I’m not going anywhere? I’m consistent already, I married him, we have a baby. He really is the love of my life. I have never loved another man like this before.. but this shit is for the birds and he thinks he’s keeping me doing this but in actuality it’s making me lose respect and detach.

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7

worried about a family members baby

So this child is three months old and she isn’t being fed from 10pm till 6/7 am idk if this is normal or safe and it’s been like this since 2 months i believe as she won’t wake her for feeds she goes to the pub drinking most nights with her baby and her baby has already been in hospital with a very low temperature bc she was outside but as soon as she was in a warm car she warmed up and doctors said she was fine she lets cats play with her bouncers toys that go over her and doesn’t strap her in she is cold from what i’ve heard from other family members and they’ve tried to warm her hands and she’s wet herself at my parents and she hasn’t had a spare vest to put on her and i offered her a blanket as she didn’t have one and she declined and she won’t listen to anyone about it she’s already left the baby with my parents for the night to go out drinking and personally i couldn’t leave my three month old because my parents said she just cried and im really unsure whether to report her or not and her house smells of dog wee/poo as she’s never home to look after them and that’s not safe for the baby i understand being lonely but she doesn’t need to go to the pub every night her friends could
go
to hers or her she could go to a cafe that has closed doors not sat outside a cold pub and it’s a bit of a rough pub in my opinion

my parents are concerned btw but they say i shouldn’t report her as it’s not fair but i feel how the baby is treated isn’t fair

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17

FTM

Hello,
FTM here. At what age do you stop applying cream on nappy area during nappy changes? My 2 year old boy isn’t toilet ready yet but uses both nappy pants/pull ups and regular diapers

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5

Forgiving a partner…

Long story short - found out 2 months ago my partner of almost 10 years has slept with two girls, one of which he’s been seeing for 8 months - during this time I was pregnant with our third child and gave birth. (She had an abortion)
I found out, he cut all ties (still works with her)
I want to try and move on from this, we have three children , and a home… I can’t face the idea of being without my children half the time. I want to try and make things work. But I can’t stop the intrusive thoughts / images of the two of them together…. Any advice if you’ve been in a similar situation?
Sick of feeling this rubbish, also 5 month pp so hormones/confidence is in pieces😣😣😣

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10

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