Terrible 2s

Anyone’s little one going through terrible 2s? My other son didn’t go through it so this is my first time and it’s draining. I don’t know what to do. Moment he wakes up moment he goes to sleep he crying,winging or screaming. He bites, smacks, pinches. I take him out he still throws tantrums. He gone off his food not eating, he not going bed now just cries and screams he will only sleep in my bed if me and my partner go bed too. It’s so hard and drowning I don’t know what to do.

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Yes well into it at the minute, it’s like her ears have become none existent and if she doesn’t get her own way everybody knows about it, the hitting and whining is just unbearable😩 and the not eating is definitely an issue here, health visitor said this is normal because it’s one of the things they are able to control, we co sleep due to circumstance but yeah getting her down to actually sleep is a fight! I just pick my fights with her, like getting dressed is a fight, I repeat that to start our day we have to get dressed and just get her dressed through the fight, same with brushing teeth I will just repeat I know you don’t like this but we have to do it to keep your teeth healthy and then there’s things that I don’t fight, such as the sleep, she will go to sleep eventually, when she’s tired enough, and she still naps so she’s getting enough sleep. I just do what works best for us together and if that means bed time is 9pm one night and 7:30 the next it is what it is😅

Yes getting dressed is a fight for me too. I think it’s hard for me too as I like routine, he was in such a good routine went to bed okay fell asleep both my boys down asleep by 8pm but now my 2 year old won’t sleep only with me and my partner. And we not getting our own time to spend together. It’s just frustrating. I got to think of this isn’t forever.

Yeah definitely. They are trying to assert their independence. I find that giving her options helps. So I would offer 2 different tops in the morning and let her pick, she then wants to get changed rather than running away from me 🙄 for naps etc I just gather all her things and tell her that I'm tired and going to bed, and then she will go. Doesn't work everytime but it helps!

Thankyou. Will try giving him option, letting him choose more see if helps x

Omg everything you have just said we're going through. My biggest battle is getting him dressed. But tonight he doesn't want to get undressed for bed. Im completely drained from it all. My mother in law keeps telling me this isn't normal and I need to get help.
Made me feel like a bad mum

@Holly it's normal! You are NOT a bad mum. I honestly let her sleep in her day clothes every now and again if I can't be bothered with the battle, not going to do her any harm!

Thank you I needed to hear that. It's just so difficult atm

I'm going through it with my son, and he isn't even two until the 26th of April. He used to listen when I told him to do something and do exactly what I said. For example, if I ask him to pick up his toys or bottle off the floor after his throne, he will do it, and you’ll put it on the table. He used to be good with following instructions. But now he laughs at me and points at it and pretends to pick it up, and then we throw it again. If he does pick it up, everything is a joke to him. I feel like I'm talking to the brick wall. Sometimes, it is just me and my son living alone. His dad hasn't seen him in almost two years, so everything falls on me. I feel like crying and screaming sometimes because my son doesn't want to listen but the thing is, when he’s at nursery, he’s a complete angel who doesn’t even give them any hassle and has no problems. He’s just like that at home with me. I do tell him no, it's not when he does something wrong but he will scream at me and say no and hit me. 🤦🏽‍♀️

On the good side, I can get him to go to bed at 8 pm, but on bad days, I have to wake up to him crying and screaming because he has to be laying down on my arm to fall back asleep, and sometimes I have to do that three or four times during out the whole night until he wakes up around 7 a.m.

Yess!! 24/7 at the minute, if anyone says no he kicks and screams, fights some nights at bed time some nights he screams for hours and won’t go to sleep until 1am! Changing his bum and getting him dressed is a fight, if he doesn’t have his own way he hits his head of anything possible, He’s also on the autism spectrum. Has developmental delays. He’s non verbal only says 3/4 words. Whining all the time sometimes I have to go out the room for 5 minutes, your not alone doll xxx

Sounds exactly like my life. We are waiting for his speech therapy appointment n then going from there. But the meltdowns are mega. He's just woken up screaming. Inconsolable. Taken an hour to get him back into bed

He’s got his first speech therapy on Monday, the meltdowns are bad aren’t they, he’s just gone to sleep, is this every night he does this? X

Oh good luck!!!! So bad. Not every night. We have a few nights like this then things calm down. But some nights we can be up 3-4 hours x

My little girl is the same. Some days are harder than others. Yesterday I was falling asleep on the sofa at 7pm🙈 but everyday is different one day she doesn’t ‘tantrum’ she’s a little monkey and just laughs even when she’s getting told off. Yesterday she bit me and was just laughing her head off. I work in a nursery so I’m always saying “show me your kind hands” but that doesn’t stop her slapping me in the face! My partner put her in her bedroom but she wasn’t even bothered, was just laughing! Other days she can cry and whinge all day!! Xx

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Baby clothes

Just out of curiosity, why do parents love zipper onesies?

Don’t get me wrong, I tried zipper ones it’s easy to zip in and out when putting it on the first time and taking it out, but I find it difficult when changing diapers especially when baby is asleep.

I prefer those kimono style buttons where it’s easy to button or too down button with crotch snaps.

Is everyone thinking the same or different? Lol

At this point I’m not enjoying motherhood

My 22 month old is horrendous at the moment🫣 biting, hitting, pushing, pulling and shoving not only adults but children he also wants what other children have and will just snatch it away from them.

We repeat ‘nice hands’ ‘be gentle’ ‘let’s share’ etc

But how do I make him understand what he’s doing isn’t very nice? At the end of the day I feel like I’ve just been saying his name all day and nothing else.

What can I do?

This might rattle some people

Ok, this might get a bit long, and a bit bumpy, so get comfy and buckle up.

So about a week or 2 ago, there was a post on here regarding sleepovers. Not letting their child go to them as you can't trust who'll be at the house etc.

Now, given recent incidents in nurseries and schools, plus my own experience back in the 90s, I am more concerned about sending my child to nursery and later school than I am to a friend's house for a sleep over.

The other day a man was jailed for abusing children at the nursery he worked at. A woman has been arrested for sleeping with an underage boy and then getting pregnant by a different underage boy while on bail for the first offence.

Young girls and boys get sexually harassed and bullied when at school, not all of them. But more than you think. And not just by other kids, but by adults who we as parents are trusting to look after our kids.

A sleepover, is a more controlled environment, with only a handful of people coming into contact with your child. A school, a club etc there can be 100s of people coming into contact with your child.

I was targeted at 7 years old by the owner of a prominent private school. Thankfully, I wasn't SA'd. In year 5 of primary school, I started to develop early, I was harassed by the boys and teachers made remarks about how my uniform didn't fit right, always "adjusting it" around my chest and legs.

Years 7-9 of secondary school were hell. But it was all under the guise of "we're just messing around". A teacher twanging my exposed bra strap (none uniform day) is not "messing around".

Boys pinning me down trying to rip open my shirt to see my breasts.

I fear for my daughter. I hope she takes after my father's family, flat chested.

We need to educate all our children, what is acceptable behaviour. And to come to us, as their parents should ANYTHING happen.

Dummy

My baby has had a dummy since about 2 weeks old (now 5 months) and over the course of the last month we weaned her off it during the day only for naps and night (which was fine) and then 5 days took it completely away during the day.

The first day no dummy was fine, the second bit rougher. But now it feels impossible she just moans and cries all the time it takes ages for her to go down to sleep (she’s always been an amazing sleeper)

I thought it was meant to get better as time went on not worse. I’m at my wits end I dunno what to do.

Currently typing this as she screams uncontrollably in the car and I cry with her cos I can’t do anything.

Help

My LO every feed. Drs don’t seem to think it’s a problem the whole Muslim cloth gets soaked so much I’m using towels now. I’ve tried size O teats he gets really frustrated and still spills it out :(

How to help my husband understand why I'd like to breastfeed

My husband is very supportive, but he is also someone who wants to make things as easy and as stress free as possible.

With our first child, I tried to breastfeed, but due to my own medical issues postpartum, baby and I were separated a lot and my milk dried up so quickly. We introduced formula around 2 weeks PP, and I tried pumping as much as I could, but it just lead to nothing. It was heartbreaking. It definitely ruined a lot of those early weeks for me, I was wrecked with guilt and sadness. I cried every day and felt like such a failure.

Now my son is a healthy, happy 2 year old and I eventually came to terms with formula feeding him. He was quite content with the first formula we tried, never had feeding or gas issues etc, so it felt like a much easier option.

Obviously my husband witnessed all of this and now we're expecting our second baby, he sort of assumed we'd just go straight to formula.

I told him pretty early that I'd like to try breastfeeding again, and although I won't be putting so much pressure on myself this time, I've also done more research and I'm more prepared for the hard times that might come up in the early days/weeks, and I'm trying to prepare for any complications.

He's very supportive and says it's totally up to me and hasn't tried to sway me either way, but I do get a feeling the moment things get difficult PP he will automatically be buying formula. And he won't mean it in a bad way, he'll just be trying to make things easier for me and take off the pressure. He won't understand that it's unhelpful.

His thinking is that as long as baby is fed that's all that matters, and I agree mostly! But I also understand how beneficial breastfeeding can be and want to give it all my effort if I'm able!

So I guess I'm asking, are there any good resources I could send him to read? Preferably nothing too long/wordy, but something that explains the benefits and how to best support me during this time too? (Also something preferably from the UK as I know guidance can differ depending on country)