Not making money as a stay at home mum, how does everyone deal with this and how does it make you feel??

I am a stay at home mom for 2 under 2. For the last 2years I have not been able to contribute to my families finances as much due to being on maternity leave. My husband earns quite a good living but by the end of the month we struggle and today I had to tell my side of the family we have to pull out from the Easter holiday we had planned as we couldn’t afford it. I feel like I have no say when it comes to finances anymore coz I don’t earn a salary.

This is putting strain on our relationship and my mental health. Anyone else feeling this way? Or any tips?

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Just an idea I saw somewhere maybe when you and your husband are relaxed sat on the sofa at some point maybe list all the things that need doing in the home/ family life and that way he will see all the things you do actually do for your family and household and he can give you a bit of grace and respect for that maybe. Just an idea x also if you are in the UK check what you are entitled to you may be able to claim some relief winter payment against bills etc to take some pressure off x

Hey! How about from September looking for a job 1-2 days a week (when we get our 15 hours free) even if it’s at a local cafe or something like that? That way it’ll be a little bit of extra money xxx

Thanks @Hollie I don think the problem is that he is not aware and as I am not earning money is becoming a very touch subject. So yes @Natalie I will be soon looking to go back in and September would be the more practical time as otherwise I will be paying more on childcare than what I earn.

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Is this normal?

Is it just my husband that does this? He is able to work from home via his computer and in the mornings and evenings he is on there doing his job. When he is done for the day he tends to stay in the room and either play video games or watch something. He will occasionally come out and play with the girls for a few minutes and that’s it but when I really need him he says he is busy. My daughters are both 1 year old now and I am just wondering how much involvement should he have with them now?
Idk if this is the norm or not…..

Thoughts?

your soon to be brother in law (upon inquiry) told you that only a few kids from the family were attending his wedding because they are over the age cut off..

5 month old activities

Hey everyone my baby is 5 months old and I want to reduce/cut screen time as I have read up on how bad it is what activities did people do to keep their baby entertained. Thank you in advance.

Tablet for kids

Alright don’t need any negative Nancy’s telling me not to get my 2yo a tablet so if that’s what your gunna do please don’t participate in my poll.

We’re about to move cross country 3+ day trip and my 2yo and 9m hate the car I’m talking scream their heads off till they are out of their seats. We’ve already changed car seats and it didn’t help so I’d like to at least have one entertained and sit next to baby and try and distract her or put her to sleep. Our new car has tvs but since they are rear faced my 2yo can’t see it.

Debating getting her a tablet or dvd player right now on long car rides I end up giving her my phone because I get so overwhelmed sitting in between both of them screaming and crying.

And yes I do bring different toys I bring snacks I play songs try to distract her other ways but for the sake of not losing my mind on this move I think this is best.

-A very overwhelmed and anxious to move mama 😓

Daycare?

Thoughts on daycare?? Truly, I am SCARED to be leaving my kid for daycare. I literally do not trust anyone, not even family (they haven’t given me a reason it’s just trust issues on my end, you never know). He’s turning 3 and I’ve been a sahm the whole time but tbh my man doesn’t make enough for us to move out somewhere more calm . We live in a ‘not so safe’ area in LA and I’m just not used to living here so I just want us to give my son a better life and in order to speed up the process I would have to work.. I do lashes at home and I’d be open to take new clients so I wouldn’t have to look for work but I’m just scared to lose my license 😭

I feel physically sick

I was going through my partners phone. He doesnt mind it. I let him go through mine,we have our emails on the tablet im an open book nothing to hide. I fine this one girl on his phone, they know each other they used to work together. Then I see that he is asking about her dating life blah blah. Then he texted "lucky enough you are one of a few beautiful" um WTF & " thats what i said if not i will have been with you" we have a 16 month old together we are engaged. I cant sleep he is sleeping next to me and I feel so sick I cant ive cried twice and I feel like im breaking