Gosh!!! I really can’t stand men sometimes!!! I’m married and all but honestly women carry the whole entire world. Men do the min and they expect to be praised for it! Arhhhhhh it’s sooooo infuriating!

We literally risk our lives brining children into this world for them the proudly slap their surnames on them and puff their chest up about ‘their legacy’ yet they can pick and choose how and when they get their hands dirty!!! Everything is always mom mom mom!! I was a single mother of 1 before I got married and had more kids and I have to say my life was a lot easier and more fulfilling. I adore all my kids and they are the only things that keep me going each day so in that sense I don’t regret being married and having them but just for comparison when I was a single mother I worked in the city making good money saved, went on amazing holidays with my little girl and it was just me and her against the world.
Now I’m married with my family that I love but I’m literally wasting away in this life sacrificing it all for them including my husband! And yet he is thriving in life!! Promotion from work that I have helped with because he comes to me with every issue he has at work and I help him resolve and give him strategy because I’m really THAT girl and always have been! And he knew who he married he knew I had the brains and would add value to his life and I definitely have! Before me he worked in a warehouse I worked on his resume pushed him encouraged him and now he’s making over 76K per year as Regional Maanger.I hardly get any acknowledgment for this. Today I am sick help me change just one diaper and his response is ‘when you’re ready you can do it’
I needed to get this out!

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To be fair, you chose this life. Women know what life is like after kids so having more kids is your choice, so is the responsibilities that come with.

And I disagree men don’t do the bare minimum and get away with it. Some men do. Just like some women are bad mothers.

Ever since I’ve gotten married and had a baby my life has only gotten better. It’s situational and sorry you feel that way! Hope things get better x

The gaslighting is strong with this one ^^ Please don’t listen.

I didn't have a clue what life would be like when I had my kid, I didn't know that I'd be the one doing it all. Thank God I have my mom and dad or in all honesty I probably would have ended up on a episode of snapped being a mom is the hardest thing I've ever done.

Okay let me say this again because obviously it wasn’t understood… as my intentions weren’t to gaslight.

If you have already had one kid, not your first kid, you have a sense of understanding what motherhood is like. If you then get married and have more kids, wouldn’t you expect your life to completely change? Wouldn’t it be fair to say life might get harder? That’s the accountability part that I was talking about.

Secondly I will stand on the part where I mentioned that not all men are useless. In my home it’s like my husband is the default parent. He carries all of the financial responsibility and still comes home to be a great father and partner. I’m not using my life as a reason to invalidate what OP is going through, just saying I don’t agree with what OP said about men originally.

It just sounds like things didn’t work out the way you thought and you might feel like having kids held you back as you spoke about jobs and being THAT girl. I sympathised.

@Chí what a shitty response.

Having kids didn't hold her back, she worked and did well as a single mum. Doing so much for her husband that doesn't help with more kids did.

Going from being a single parent to a married one, most wouldn't assume life would get harder but easier. Another person to help, to give a break.

'To be fair you chose this life' 😅🤣 No one chooses to be an unsupported partner.

Why even comment? No advise or empathy. 'My situation is better' keep it to yourself.

I don’t think I mentioned anything about a shitty partner. I mentioned that it’s fair to assume that life would be different and possibly harder with more kids… even if you’re married or not, going from 1 child to multiple children is difficult.

Furthermore I never said it’s anyone’s fault for having an unsupportive partner. It just sounds like it’s about resentment. Mentioning salaries and trips…

What are you even talking about anyway.

in our community

Divorced at 5 months PP

My husband just divorced me yesterday.

I'm 5 months post partum and I feel like complete shit. I literally can't stop crying and I don't feel like eating and this whole week my milk supply has gone down due to stress and not eating. What helps with milk supply?

The divorce- on Monday at 5am me and my husband had a small argument on text. It was regarding him not catering to my love language. I sent him a video on how women shouldn't have to ask and how laziness can kill a relationship. We've had many arguments regarding this prior about him not catering to my love language and he doesn't buy me flowers or doesn't think of me. Anyways this night, he text me saying he doesn't do Mother's Day and all that, he doesn't want to buy me flowers because my sisters buy me flowers and he can't be arsed with my moods. He said I've not been his peace and said he's done.
I replied "okay. All I want is for you to appreciate me and love me as your wife and mother of your child. I'm not pushing you away, I'm begging you to love me etc etc. I'm done too."

I come home from my errands that morning and he's upped and left. He took all of his belongings, clothes, drawer, tv- everything.

He didn't ring or text me or anything.

The property is in my name and as he left and didn't leave the key, I changed the locks the next day. I feel this is what pushed him over the edge.

He officially divorced me on Saturday.
I'm 5 months post partum and I have a 5 year old from my ex partner too.

I just want to talk about it with someone that's not biased. Was I asking for too much? I feel he just didn't want to be with me anymore and used this as an excuse? Or is that me overthinking....
Input would be nice xoxo

Partner is giving me the silent treatment

So I was struggling with my postpartum anxiety bad yesterday. My partner and I was out for drinks with family. He kept making jokes about treating me a bit shit.
Which no one thought was funny. I am usually quite patient about him using me as his jokes, but yesterday it hurt.

When we got home I told him it made me feel disrespected. Now he is giving me the cold fat shoulder?! What do I do ?

wtf moment?

I have been going back and forth with my husband lately. Well not lately it’s been years. He is the best husband and father you could ask for; for two weeks. Then he’s inconsistent. It drives me mad. Then he’s back to husband and dad of the year , then back to same inconsistency. I talked to him about this last night and he said “if i was lovey dovey and acted like this all the time you’d get bored and cheat on me.”

Ok so for starters i know some of you are going to say omg omg omg super controlling omg leave omg. No im not doing that. Im happy he finally admitted his wrong doing and taking accountability for it but id like to know the deeper reason, the what the f has him thinking like this reason, the personality trait reason. He’s obviously scared I’m going to leave him; so much so that he’s doing this dumb shit to prevent it. Past trauma? What do y’all think I can do to get him to see I’m not going anywhere? I’m consistent already, I married him, we have a baby. He really is the love of my life. I have never loved another man like this before.. but this shit is for the birds and he thinks he’s keeping me doing this but in actuality it’s making me lose respect and detach.

FTM

Hello,
FTM here. At what age do you stop applying cream on nappy area during nappy changes? My 2 year old boy isn’t toilet ready yet but uses both nappy pants/pull ups and regular diapers

worried about a family members baby

So this child is three months old and she isn’t being fed from 10pm till 6/7 am idk if this is normal or safe and it’s been like this since 2 months i believe as she won’t wake her for feeds she goes to the pub drinking most nights with her baby and her baby has already been in hospital with a very low temperature bc she was outside but as soon as she was in a warm car she warmed up and doctors said she was fine she lets cats play with her bouncers toys that go over her and doesn’t strap her in she is cold from what i’ve heard from other family members and they’ve tried to warm her hands and she’s wet herself at my parents and she hasn’t had a spare vest to put on her and i offered her a blanket as she didn’t have one and she declined and she won’t listen to anyone about it she’s already left the baby with my parents for the night to go out drinking and personally i couldn’t leave my three month old because my parents said she just cried and im really unsure whether to report her or not and her house smells of dog wee/poo as she’s never home to look after them and that’s not safe for the baby i understand being lonely but she doesn’t need to go to the pub every night her friends could
go
to hers or her she could go to a cafe that has closed doors not sat outside a cold pub and it’s a bit of a rough pub in my opinion

my parents are concerned btw but they say i shouldn’t report her as it’s not fair but i feel how the baby is treated isn’t fair

Forgiving a partner…

Long story short - found out 2 months ago my partner of almost 10 years has slept with two girls, one of which he’s been seeing for 8 months - during this time I was pregnant with our third child and gave birth. (She had an abortion)
I found out, he cut all ties (still works with her)
I want to try and move on from this, we have three children , and a home… I can’t face the idea of being without my children half the time. I want to try and make things work. But I can’t stop the intrusive thoughts / images of the two of them together…. Any advice if you’ve been in a similar situation?
Sick of feeling this rubbish, also 5 month pp so hormones/confidence is in pieces😣😣😣