Let down by husband

I just feel that I am responsible for everything and if I ask him to do something then why am I not doing it and it’s just a big ask for him. I am keeping this house running and looking after baby and back to working full time with shift work. It’s not that it’s too much because that’s just life. But I do feel he is does not put as much effort into everyday house things and it’s starting to irritate me! Not divorce irritate but just urgh…. Why won’t you think for yourself!!
And I can’t tell friends and family as I don’t want them to think badly of him. He is a good dad but I feel he is always playing on his phone or distracted and not giving us enough attention. Makes me sad that my boy might be an only child as how in hell will he cope if there is another one….. just needed to type this somewhere and feel I have said it to someone

Read more on Peanut

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

Learn more about our guidelines.

Add a comment

I feel the exact same and it’s really hard. Really hard to not lose my shit. Constantly asking him to put his phone away. It’s just painful some days and I know I can do the same but I’m so much more aware and spend so much more time with our boy. We’ll never have another cause he can’t cope with one even though I do 75% of everything 🥲

It’s so hard being the main care giver, my husband is great with our little girl but it’s little things like they never think or go above and beyond, like what does the baby need? is it actually in the baby bag, has the baby got food made for tomorrow, do I need to put a wash on so they have clean clothes, are we running out of nappies or formula 🙈 Women do practically everything! X

It’s just so frustrating.
And then when he tells me the baby whined all day whilst I was at work I imagine it’s because he had his phone glued to his hand (the baby has an obsession with phones but I don’t like him having them purely because he has a hissy fit if you take it back)

The washing is done by me, although I don’t do the husbands washing as he never does ours (petty as it seems)
Food shop seems like a chore for him so I just crack on.

I just feel if I ask him to do something I am inconveniencing him!

in our community

Is this normal?

Is it just my husband that does this? He is able to work from home via his computer and in the mornings and evenings he is on there doing his job. When he is done for the day he tends to stay in the room and either play video games or watch something. He will occasionally come out and play with the girls for a few minutes and that’s it but when I really need him he says he is busy. My daughters are both 1 year old now and I am just wondering how much involvement should he have with them now?
Idk if this is the norm or not…..

Saying NO to buying toys etc

5 year old is getting really envious of others. He is obsessed with items that other kids have at school. I am pestered daily to buy these things in a different style when we already have 3 others. I have seen parents just buying stuff their kid likes which I don't necessarily agree with even when i can afford it. How do you deal with it?

Thoughts?

your soon to be brother in law (upon inquiry) told you that only a few kids from the family were attending his wedding because they are over the age cut off..

Tablet for kids

Alright don’t need any negative Nancy’s telling me not to get my 2yo a tablet so if that’s what your gunna do please don’t participate in my poll.

We’re about to move cross country 3+ day trip and my 2yo and 9m hate the car I’m talking scream their heads off till they are out of their seats. We’ve already changed car seats and it didn’t help so I’d like to at least have one entertained and sit next to baby and try and distract her or put her to sleep. Our new car has tvs but since they are rear faced my 2yo can’t see it.

Debating getting her a tablet or dvd player right now on long car rides I end up giving her my phone because I get so overwhelmed sitting in between both of them screaming and crying.

And yes I do bring different toys I bring snacks I play songs try to distract her other ways but for the sake of not losing my mind on this move I think this is best.

-A very overwhelmed and anxious to move mama 😓

Daycare?

Thoughts on daycare?? Truly, I am SCARED to be leaving my kid for daycare. I literally do not trust anyone, not even family (they haven’t given me a reason it’s just trust issues on my end, you never know). He’s turning 3 and I’ve been a sahm the whole time but tbh my man doesn’t make enough for us to move out somewhere more calm . We live in a ‘not so safe’ area in LA and I’m just not used to living here so I just want us to give my son a better life and in order to speed up the process I would have to work.. I do lashes at home and I’d be open to take new clients so I wouldn’t have to look for work but I’m just scared to lose my license 😭

Struggling

My husband works and does so much for me and my baby girl. However I get annoyed every time he hops on a video game he usually plays for 1-2 hrs if she's still awake and has like 3+hrs of free time once she goes to sleep (i co/contact sleep). The last time I was able to have actual free time was last month when I tried to turn some onesies into shirts for baby girl to sleep in- and I wasn't able to finish them and haven't picked them up since lol. The only free time I get is while she's napping right next to me where I can't move an inch or breathe too deeply or she'll wake up, or when I shower. Crafting used to be my outlet and now if I were ever to tell him that I need to craft I don't even know what I would do or where to start I just sit there and stare.... just losing myself and I'm struggling with it. Does anyone else feel the same way? What do I do?