Gift cards only

I greatly appreciate everyone who will attend our baby’s birthday. Gifts are never mandatory but I would rather not collect more toys and clothes. Does this sound rude?

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I think it’s rude. I understand your point but I would only say that if the guest asks

I’ve seen a lot of people asking for money instead of gifts, like contributing to college saving or literally just for money hahaha I would say If you wish you could contribute us for her Disney trip’

Well i guess i might be rude to some , even though they knew you are a nice and humble one , everyone thinks different so better not to mention, sorry:)

Maybe change the wording. Presents are never mandatory and the reason you don't want them I think goes without saying (they don't need them).

We are so excited for everyone to join us in celebrating____. Your presence is gift enough! If you would like to contribute to our upcoming trip to Disney in lieu of gifts you may do so at _________.

“Your presence is present enough so please know gifts are not necessary” is how I worded it on my son’s.

NOT RUDE. I genuinely wish I had said something similar because I don’t want ANY. MORE. FUCKING. TOYS. IN. THIS. GAHT. DAYUM. HOUSE.

Just ask for receipts 🧾 for toys and clothes so you can exchange them. that’s all

I don't think it's rude at all but I wouldn't even know how to find a Disney gift card so I'd just ask for cash or a visa gift card 😂

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Family culture difference on money

Sorry this is long, I hope some of you get to the end and give advice!!!

So I’m a very thrifty person, things are tight at the moment, the cost of living crisis and my house is heated by oil so things are extortionate. We aren’t on the bread line but we aren’t flush, hubby might be made redundant so there is some financial pressure.

Sometimes I buy my sons something nicer, on the justification that I can sell it on after (♥️ vinted ♥️). I have also been planning on pretty much breaking even most of the baby things I bought from face book market place, side by crib, baby changing unit, etc.

Hubby and I have different money cultures with our families (he’s Indian, I’m British). I’m my family we don’t mix money, we would help each other out if someone was in trouble and will get each other gifts on special occasions. With hubby’s family money is much more fluid, they will give each other things worth thousands of £ just because.

Hubby’s brother bought him a new laptop and a new Google phone, he’s been very generous to hubby. Hubby hasn’t given the same back because brother is much richer.

Hubby and I mostly share finances. If it’s relevant I’m the higher earner.

Now to the point! My babies are so cute they’ve given hubby’s brother (currently single) baby rabies. He’s asked for our baby stuff when we’re done with it. He’s been so generous to hubby I feel really stingy saying no. But I’d never have bought some of the stuff if I wasn’t going to get a return on it - the thought makes me a bit anxious. If we gave all our baby stuff given the second hand value it still wouldn’t equal what the brother had given hubby.

I thought maybe I could give him some stuff but sell some stuff, but hubby said then his brother will just have to go out and buy that stuff, so I should name my price and ask his brother for the money. That makes me feel very uncomfortable, given how generous the brother has been to hubby.

So what do I do ladies? Give it all and suck it up? Give part of it and sell parts on Vinted/FB, or ask hubbys brother for money for it and be uncomfortable? Or do you see another solution?

No one is being entitled or rude here, just a culture difference I need to navigate.

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