SA allegation 2 yo

-left my 2 year old for with her older sibling to get prescription this morning.
-got back my eldest (Jo)said she fell of the balance bike twice.
- i told my 2 year old let’s change her bum and she said three or four times ‘Jo hurt my bum’ meaning her vagina and she pointed in that region.
-Jo said she didn’t do anything to her.
-She goes nursery and has never made this allegation before.
-Anyone know how I can handle this situation?
-She seems fine now.
- my eldest Jo went out and I called her and told her she is still saying the same thing she said it’s probably because she fell of the bike.
Thoughts anyone?
Thanks if you made it this far.
I feel like a failure I never leave my 2 year old with my eldest as I’ve been a victim of SA am I projecting. I can’t relax and feel I’m going mad. Am I over thinking?

Read more on Peanut

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

Learn more about our guidelines.
Add a comment
Avatar

Have you had a look to see where the pain is l ? I'd ask how did Jo hurt her and what with ? I don't think you're over thinking it's always best to check these things out

Avatar

Young children don’t lie about these things, I would trust your two year old. I’m so sorry mumma.

In terms of handling the situation, you can ask your 2 year old more questions to describe what happened (give her lots of hugs / praise if it helps), and you may need to visit a doctor.

You haven’t mentioned the age of your eldest, but I would be considering calling the police if an alleged SA has happened. It’s an incredibly serious offence, and they will also be able to provide your eldest and your family with the support services.

Avatar

I would take her to the doctor ASAP to try to determine what happened. Even if she really did fall off the bike, she could have injured herself there and need medical attention. I wouldn't ask further questions. I know in some countries this could cause confusion in the long run when professionals try to determine what did or didn't happen.

Avatar

How old is your eldest? You also don't want to accuse her of doing something she didn't do if she's also fairly young. I would just ask the 2 year old more questions. I'm assuming maybe it was just the bike incident. Also, it's important to teach proper words for her private parts. My daughter knows what her vagina is and the difference between the two areas. That way she can properly communicate if she's been SA and there won't be any sort of confusion.

Is it possible that Jo spanked her?
Just trying to offer a different perspective instead of assuming the absolute worst. I'm sorry you're going through this scare!

Avatar

It could be the bike accideshe is referring to however i would ask her of the bike hurt her there or if it was Jos hand for example. Id ask whilst playing a game or puzzle so its not coming across as serious. I also have a 2yr old, turned 2 in Jan and this is how id start digging a little to find out more.
Im also extremely paranoid about leaving her with anyone other than her father and my parents. Unfortunately i dont trust many people esp after doing so many child protection courses and working with vulnerable children.

I hope it was bike that hurt her during the fall hun and you can put your mind at ease x

Avatar

I would ask the 2 year old how was she hurt. Bring the 2 year old to the doctor to be checked. I would purchase nanny cams to be extra safe. Don't tell anyone about the cameras.

Read more on Peanut

Trending

in our community

AITA

In the uk there is an outbreak of meningitis, in a specific area mainly. My BD has family from that area and decided to go and meet up with them, I said if he does then he cannot have contact with the kids for 7-10 days after incase he picks anything up. Am I being over dramatic? I reallyyy don’t want my young kids getting anything serious

Avatar

21

Baby clothes

Just out of curiosity, why do parents love zipper onesies?

Don’t get me wrong, I tried zipper ones it’s easy to zip in and out when putting it on the first time and taking it out, but I find it difficult when changing diapers especially when baby is asleep.

I prefer those kimono style buttons where it’s easy to button or too down button with crotch snaps.

Is everyone thinking the same or different? Lol

Avatar

20

This might rattle some people

Ok, this might get a bit long, and a bit bumpy, so get comfy and buckle up.

So about a week or 2 ago, there was a post on here regarding sleepovers. Not letting their child go to them as you can't trust who'll be at the house etc.

Now, given recent incidents in nurseries and schools, plus my own experience back in the 90s, I am more concerned about sending my child to nursery and later school than I am to a friend's house for a sleep over.

The other day a man was jailed for abusing children at the nursery he worked at. A woman has been arrested for sleeping with an underage boy and then getting pregnant by a different underage boy while on bail for the first offence.

Young girls and boys get sexually harassed and bullied when at school, not all of them. But more than you think. And not just by other kids, but by adults who we as parents are trusting to look after our kids.

A sleepover, is a more controlled environment, with only a handful of people coming into contact with your child. A school, a club etc there can be 100s of people coming into contact with your child.

I was targeted at 7 years old by the owner of a prominent private school. Thankfully, I wasn't SA'd. In year 5 of primary school, I started to develop early, I was harassed by the boys and teachers made remarks about how my uniform didn't fit right, always "adjusting it" around my chest and legs.

Years 7-9 of secondary school were hell. But it was all under the guise of "we're just messing around". A teacher twanging my exposed bra strap (none uniform day) is not "messing around".

Boys pinning me down trying to rip open my shirt to see my breasts.

I fear for my daughter. I hope she takes after my father's family, flat chested.

We need to educate all our children, what is acceptable behaviour. And to come to us, as their parents should ANYTHING happen.

Avatar

3

At this point I’m not enjoying motherhood

My 22 month old is horrendous at the moment🫣 biting, hitting, pushing, pulling and shoving not only adults but children he also wants what other children have and will just snatch it away from them.

We repeat ‘nice hands’ ‘be gentle’ ‘let’s share’ etc

But how do I make him understand what he’s doing isn’t very nice? At the end of the day I feel like I’ve just been saying his name all day and nothing else.

What can I do?

Avatar

4

Car seat

No idea which car seat to get next. Please hit me with your recommendations, 1year+ (preferably rear facing or 360). Thank you 🫶🏻

Avatar

12

Dummy

My baby has had a dummy since about 2 weeks old (now 5 months) and over the course of the last month we weaned her off it during the day only for naps and night (which was fine) and then 5 days took it completely away during the day.

The first day no dummy was fine, the second bit rougher. But now it feels impossible she just moans and cries all the time it takes ages for her to go down to sleep (she’s always been an amazing sleeper)

I thought it was meant to get better as time went on not worse. I’m at my wits end I dunno what to do.

Currently typing this as she screams uncontrollably in the car and I cry with her cos I can’t do anything.

Avatar

12

Read more on Peanut