HELP! My 2yo little girl has suddenly started showing really bad tantrums

I'm also really worried that there may be more to this behavior. Should I worry about an underlying condition?

Tantrums are really common at that age. I suggest checking out Big Little Feelings. A friend of mine with a very strong-willed two year old swears by them. But, if you're concerned about something underlying, definitely contact her pediatrician. If nothing else, for piece of mind.

Thank you very much. I have ordered that book right away. Has some great reviews. Hope it helps 😭

if not for her, for me at least 😂

Oh it's fucking horrible, sorry lol. Terrible 2s is not a joke & moms lie when they say their kids never had tantrums. I'm sure they did lol.

Is she potty trained?

Thank you. That's reaffirming. She's not but we have started trying to potty train. But not consistent. Does it have any connection? Will it help.

When will it end? I feel like everyone is doing a great job managing them but I just can't figure out how to help her.

I said if she uses the potty, she gets a prize at the end, we used the potty chart for maybe 2 weeks then she had a few m&M's for using the potty which quickly turned into using it all day every day. She would have 1-2 accidents a week, it'll happen. But thats the steps and how you know they are ready. & Actively try every 2 hours, for 4 days! Day 2-3 throw her in undies all day. Let her feel what an accident feels like (it's okay, that's part of the process) & just stay super positive and upbeat about it!

She might do better with a living room portable potty OR the toilet seat one with a stool to sit on like everyone uses.

Lastly, you are asking me when it will end, & I was asking another mom this when I was in your shoes. It's such a sweet moment I can share with you right now❤️ it does end. But the secret to all of it is, you might have to cry in front of her, you might have to sit in the kitchen so she can hear you/ see you, learn what feeling guilty is & learn how her actions cause things to change.

Sometimes you need to be firm, sometimes you need to take a break, sometimes especially you need your husband/ the dad to step in & act shocked! "Child's name! Oh my goodness! That is not okay! Poor mama, awww poor mama, it's okay mama I love you/ daddy loves you" you do need help. Because this is when it takes a village to raise a child. I think it honestly is just the dark era called "Terrible 2s"

My daughter is finally past this & 4 very soon. I say she went through it for 6-8 months tbh. & I remember just seeing others at stores so HAPPY LITTLE 2 YEAR OLDS & HAPPY PARENTS LIKE WTF😳🤣🤣🤣🤣 & I remember that feeling, that sad mean feeling like (what the f am I doing? Girls are MEAN. IDC what anyone says lol. Now my daughter just verbally roasts me but she's so much more mature so a tantrum would be crying for absolutely no reason🤣❤️ then she says she needs a hug❤️❤️❤️ & I ask her "your heart sounds sad baby" and she says "Yeah but my heart is sad because you said no to i have a chocolate" 😉

I work as an RBT, I know you mentioned you gave her warnings but maybe set a visual timer that shows she has an hour to watch Peppa pig? and when timer is up and makes a sound, you tell her you have a different fun activity for her to do. You can continue trying this for a couple of days and then eventually fade out the second fun activity because she might start to understand that Peppa ends when the timer goes off? This could work or it could not but I hope it does

You could also try psychology on her. If all of this doesn't work. I would reinact my daughter having a tantrum as a last ditch effort & slide down my stairs then sit up immediately (very short like 2-3 min) and say "oh no! What's that sound?!!!!" Go look for the tantrum/ mimic your daughters fake tantrum cries😁 actively look for the noise but sometimes make it! Then 3-5 minutes doing this "Awww, fridge.. you okay?" The fridge says "NO, GO AWAY" & just pretend to hug and console the fridge (anything lol teddy bear, race car, table, pillow make it up every time) & this actually stops tantrums as well because the child isnt getting attention but is also distracted. They want to play with you now. But it's different with every kid & might work half the time❤️

These tantrums are very normal and consistency is key. We have meltdowns over here too. I agree with following Big Little Feelings on Instagram. Our 2 year old son also hit and use to bite. We never did it to him so we were confused too. We got the books “ hands are not for hitting” and “teeth are not for bitting”. Every time he did we would go to a quite place and when he was calmed we would read it together. He hasn’t done it for a while.

You are not a bad momma and motherhood is the toughest job! While I love it, we are one and done because I can’t imagine doing this again. Just remember, she is her own little person and our job isn’t meant to prevent them from crying, but to be able to give them tools to manage big emotions. At 2, she’s still got a while to go to fill that toolbox.

omg! Thanks so much for all the advice. They are great and I really appreciate you typing them out. ❤️

I can resonate with that mama. Thank you ❤️❤️❤️

You’ve gotten great advice on this thread. Here’s another thing you may want to consider: https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/child-behaviourist-warns-watching-peppa-25230055.amp

It’s not something she will have learnt it’s just toddlers way of handling their frustration.

Tv can contribute massively to tantrums so maybe try reducing to 20 mins at a time. I am in no way judging as we also use more tv than I would like but I found 20 minute intervals worked better

This is normal, she didn’t learn it from anyone it’s just how toddlers show their emotions unfortunately. They have no other way of doing it instead of lashing out at times.

In this situation I would have gently held her hands and calmly said “I understand you are upset, that is not a reason to hit mummy, mummy is moving away to protect her body, I am here if you need a cuddle, we can take deep breaths together if you like?” and then just moved away but sat close enough that she can still see me and come to me if she wants to.

My little one has now caught on to the fact that if she hurts me or her dad we will move away from her and she doesn’t like that.

Honestly sometimes they just need to work through it while knowing you are there for when they calm down. It really really sucks.

Could there have been other reasons it was so bad? Hungry, tired, overstimulated, not enough connection etc. often there is something else going on

Also peppe pig is not a good program for kids to watch, it’s been put down by a lot of professionals and we have never watched it in this house.
Try something like puffin rock, it’s a lot calmer and also educational.

The terrible 2s are definitely the hardest so far, some days I struggle with my girls tantrums she's almost 2 and a half. Making sure she's somewhere safe, I remove myself from the room and a take a few minutes when I'm feeling overwhelmed definitely helps x