Babies falling asleep on their own?

My 9 week old doesn’t go to sleep on her own either. She’s brilliant at night and she does the same, falls asleep on my chest after a feed & wind. Day time she will only contact nap, don’t listen to his ‘friend’, they’re still so small at 9 weeks and need their parents! It doesn’t last forever and they will settle themselves to sleep when they’re bigger and are able too.
Don’t let it worry you, you’re doing a fab job xx

They literally don’t know how to self soothe at this age, they’ll need help for a few weeks/months! My 3 year old only started napping in the day on his own properly at around 8 months! My little girl is 11 weeks and gets overtired if we miss her nap as she can’t settle herself yet. Ignore his mate, this is completely normal!

Same here with my nearly 11 week old. It’s completely normal as they’re still so young and can’t self soothe at the moment. All my research says there’s no point trying to ‘sleep train’ before 4 months!

My sister in law shared a guide she purchased from a sleep consultant which also says this:

Between 0-3 Months:
At this age, settling your baby completely to sleep if needed is absolutely fine. Using a swaddle, dark room and time to wind-down will help your little one learn it is time to sleep.

Between 3-6 Months:
After 4 months, if your baby can't self-settle we recommend gradually reducing the input of you helping your little one to sleep and allowing them the chance to fall asleep unassisted. Following our Self-Settling Guide in conjunction with the Sleeping and Feeding Guide will help your baby learn to self-settle.

Please don’t stress :) x

I second Bee. We’ve gotten rid of our Moses basket downstairs because I’ve just accepted she just likes napping on me during the day and it ended up just being clothes storage.

She’s great during the night. Goes straight to sleep on her dad after I’ve fed her. And she then sleeps all night once out in her crib. She will also sleep in her pram when out and about.

Chances are, that person had/has a rubbish night with their baby 🤣 and honestly, I’d take her contact napping on me during the day always if it means great nights any day of the week.

My baby is nearly 12 weeks old and he also won’t sleep without being rocked or held or fed… if I even attempted to try and let him fall asleep on his own he will just cry and get to the point where hes so overtired he won’t sleep anymore at all and the day/night is ruined! I think in this case it’s important to understand every baby is different and at this stage they are still so little that the correct way to do anything is the one that works best for you and baby. Baby will only fall asleep while being fed? Great if that works for you then carry on!

I haven’t even read all of this but I just want to say - don’t let this ruin things for you. I now have two children but was told this with my first and it took over my life trying to teach him to fall asleep on his own
Now I’m so relaxed my 12 week old falls asleep on the boob or in the sling and it’s amazing. Eventually they learn to. My son now sleeps 7-7 and we do books and kisses and he goes to sleep himself x

I wouldn’t worry at all. That’s very naive of that person to say! My little one needs help to sleep at the min (cuddles/dummy/rocking etc) and I’m ok with that as their sleep changes at 4 months anyway! At that point we’ll put him in his own room and do some gentle sleep training using the Ferber method. Not for everyone but it’s what worked with my eldest so we will do then same this time too 😊 in my opinion there is not much point trying to force anything before 4 months anyway as they have such a big sleep development so enjoy the cuddles whilst you get them. My eldest isn’t interested now 😂 xx

my health visitor literally told me that babies don’t know how to put themselves to sleep until they’re like 3/4 months old and even then they struggle. My 8 week old always needs rocking to sleep and i dont see the harm in that, get those sleepy snuggled in while they’re little x

Babies don’t know how to soothe themselves yet, some of them are able to fall asleep on their own and some of them are not. I don’t think you’re doing anything wrong! My LG during the day is not able to settle herself to sleep, during the night it’s a bit easier but still sometimes needs help x you’re not doing anything wrong, I agree with Inês that correct way is the one that works best for both you and the baby x

What a horrible thing to say to someone!
Tell them they are f*cked* if they keep speaking to people like that; they will end up miserable and lonely people

I also second everyone on here

My LO would only go to sleep if her dad rocked her to sleep.... he works 4 on, 4 off so you can imagine the nights when I had her and it would take AGES for her to fall asleep. Apparently I'm not as good as her dad 😅😅😅😅

My lo will go to sleep in her crib in the daytime if we put a dummy in (sometimes on her own, sometimes need to sit next to her and replace dummy). However my first didn't sleep on her own.
As pp's have said, I don't think helping them sleep at this age is a bad thing. They're still little and can't get bad habits yet. Do what works for you to get them some sleep! All babies are different.

I made a poll about this and 80% said their babies need support if they won’t sleep so don’t panic!! My girl is coming up to 12 weeks and uust starting to self settle if she wakes up in the night

My son is nearly 2 now .. we exclusively contact napped during the day and sing him to sleep at night .... Now when we put him asleep we simply sit in the room so he feels safe and leave once he's gone.. as long as they are content on their own I don't see an issue

You’re not doing anything wrong please don’t worry! Your baby needs you in order to be able to settle and that’s perfectly normal. Before the age of 6 months they don’t even realise they aren’t apart of you so when they need to nap they need to be close to you. My baby is 11 weeks old and there have been only a couple of times in the past week where I have changed him, got him dressed and set him down and he has just dozed off to sleep on his own but that wasn’t an intentional or regular thing, we still have a long way to go before he is ready to be doing this for most/all of his naps. Please don’t worry love and keep doing what’s right for you and your baby!

god my partner works 4 on 4 off too - it is so bloody hard isn’t it xx

Honestly everyone I’ve asked has said not to bother trying any sleep stuff til 16 weeks. They need help before then to fall asleep.. So we plan to do some gentle sleep training then.. and we try to put her down for naps in the day when she’s fallen asleep with us, sometimes works sometimes doesn’t!!

My 9 week old only contact naps if I put her down she will wake up straight away or o the odd occasion stay down for 30 mins , 40 at a push but that is very few and far between the only time she puts herself to sleep is in the car or in her pram and that’s because we are moving - don’t listen to the friend ever baby is different

I’d ignore your “friend”, baby’s struggle to self settle. But saying that a few times when I know the wake window is closing I’ll pop my lo in his cot and potter around his bedroom putting clothes away/having a tidy and before I know it he’s asleep. But I’ve done that from day dot so he’s used to it. It doesn’t always work mind….

Wow what an overwhelming response!! I can't reply to everyone individually as I'll spam everyone's notifications for each reply, but just wanted to say thank you to all of you girls who commented, clearly you're all on the same page and align with what I think and feel and it's been super reassuring to see that! Thank you all, I feel much better 😊 🙏