So my spouse and I got into a disagreement last night and I mentioned to him about helping some with the kids. We both have full time jobs, he pays the mortgage/home insurance, I pay the other bills as well as daycare, groceries, clothes for the kids diapers wipes etc. he said that I wanted to be a mom so that it’s my responsibility to take of the kids and if I want him to switch roles with him that he doesn’t mind taking care of the kids while I pay all the bills/mortgage to support our household.. I completely feel that this is not right, I could kind of see his point if I didn’t work, but even in that case all moms rather they work a 9-5 at work, or at home with the kids deserve breaks and support too. This comment really upset me because I feel like i not only help provide, but I take care of the kids just for me to be told that it’s not enough or if I need help/support with the kids I need to provide for our family 100% so that he doesn’t have both the man and the woman’s responsibilities
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If you guys are making equal income, then all the expenses should be split 50-50. If someone is making more than the other, then all expenses should be split based on a sliding scale of pay. It might actually make more sense for one person to stay at home and cut the cost of daycare based on your income
he makes more which is why I pay lights, water, and all the extra expenses. I do get the helping provide thing but I don’t think that should be a reason for me to not have support with the kids when I feel like I’m getting overwhelmed with them

Maybe he was just frustrated with how it was brought up? His points make some sense, but we don't live in an ideal world, so it isn't that black and white. He should definitely be helping, ESPECIALLY since you both work
maybe so.. Very true

Yeah totally he should be helping

That is disappointing that he’s not willing to help you. He’s supposed to be your partner, and also those kids parent.