Parenting 24/7 is harder than going to work full time?

I feel like a whole new person after my days I’ve been working instead of parenting. It helps I love my job, but the biggest thing is not being 24/7 responsible for someone else’s life. I eat alone, pee alone, I’m not constantly on high alert. For me, working is 100000x easier

And also the fact yeah he might have stress at work but he comes home and does what he wants every evening and every weekend. I resent him because I don’t get that!

Oh it’s for sure harder to parent 24 h/7
I tried both

My husband is completely the opposite, he is a stay at home dad and he thinks it is easier than working. I absolutely could not do it though 😅

Any partner who claims this is completely self centred. They either don't even notice how hard you're working and how little time you have to relax, or they notice and don't care because they want to keep their life as easy as possible. In my personal opinion anyone who is happy to prioritise themselves in this way doesn't truly love or respect the person they are with. It's not really about what is harder, sometimes it's objectively harder for my husband(but he absolutely contributes to the household), sometimes it's harder for me, we just both do our best. Ask him, why does he think he deserves 50 hours chill time(assuming he works 50 and sleeps 8 a night) and you deserve nothing? Maybe his work is harder sometimes in some ways but it's not mentally exhausting in the same way. Plus he's not developing a bond with his child, that's unacceptable. Is this the example he wants to set? Big changes needed from him or you're(hopefully) going to wake up one day and realise you deserve better!

I personally found being a SAHM much easier than working full-time but that's me, everyone is different.

At least when I didn't have to work full-time I had genuine time to spend with my daughter/family, time for housework, time to chill without constantly feeling like I'm falling behind on something, it was so much easier and I was a lot happier.

It doesn't have to be a competition, people will thrive/struggle in different situations, it doesn't make one automatically easier/harder than the other, it's a personal experience.

With that though, he should still be helping. Working doesn't remove his responsibility to the kid(s) and home.

Firstly, parents who work full time don’t get a break either. Working is time away from the kids, sure, but it’s not a break, and when you’ve “clocked off” from work, you’re a parent. So it is also 24/7, it’s just that some of those 24 hours are spent working a job that isn’t taking care of the children. If your partner isn’t pulling his weight outside of his working hours, then that needs to change.

So having said that, there isn’t a one size fits all on whether working parents or SAHP have it “easier”. There are too many variables. What is the job, how demanding is it. How “easy” is the child, does the child nap? Are there multiple children? Does the working parent enjoy their job? Are they working because they want to, or would they rather be home with the children but that’s not an option?

Being a parent is tough no matter how you manage it - but the bottom line is, neither parent should be “clocking out” of parenting. That’s just not how it works.

Firstly why do you allow this to happen? He's an ignorant piece of crap to even say that to you when he literally has no idea at all.

It's much easier to be in his shoes, going to work then coming home and not parenting, looking after his child or partner.

I'm a SAHM I have a 4 year old and 15 month old, yes it would be easier for me to go to work and let someone else (nursery) take care of my kids but I don't want that, I wanna be the one to do that.

My eldest attends nursery 3 hours a day and some days are tiring but I still have a parter that comes home from work every day at 4pm and he's in full dad mode, present, plays with them, takes them to bed, does bath time ect, yet he doesn't complain. When hes home, we are 50/50 a team!! If I wanna go for a lie down or some space, i just tell him and I go upstairs and chill on my own

Just stop allowing him to do to the bare minimum

Lol maybe you got me at a bad time. My 14month old is teething so bad that she has me sleeping on the floor, very jealous of my husband that just went to work. 😭😂😂

Tell him to try being a single parent and doing both. Then he'll tired but 100% being a stay at home parent is harder - you've got the physical, emotional and mental tiredness.

The amount of unpaid labour I have done over the years has been way more stressful, time consuming, etc then any job I've ever worked and there were times I worked 2 jobs and I still felt I had more energy and time for myself than I do now.

Both have their own challenges honestly. I've done both and can't say one is harder than the other

1000% harder being a full time parent. There’s a reason I’ve chosen to go back to work even though I could be a SAHM. It’s not for the weak!

Highly HIGHLY recommend him having a week alone with the kids (off work that week) and revisit the conversation.

I find working a lot harder personally.

Depending on the job, it can be exhausting for different reasons

My husband has a mentally demanding job. Being a mother it’s physically, mentally, and emotionally draining

He also has the workload of the home (bills, chores, etc)

Once my son got older (and easier to manage he said) he realized what I did in a day

I found a part time job briefly til it closed down and he was both working and taking care of our toddler 5 days a week

It was then that he realized and started to show an understanding of what I did daily

We only started dating again within the last few months and it definitely helps for both of us to get a break and have time to connect with one another

Depends on his job

I'm a part time y6 teacher and make about 1000 decisions a day.

Love parenting BUT doing it 24/7 is a lonely lonely place and hard mentally. Way harder than going to work where you get to eat on your own and to talk to adults.

Respect to any SAHM . Ask him to do it for 2 days while you do KIT days and see how he feels. Organise nothing. Let him make hisown mistakes.

It's not petty - it's the only way he'll truly see what you do in a day

I think it depends. If he only works and don't take part in any family responsibility it's super easy for him. If he works full time and ALSO takes on his responsibility at home out of work schedule it's also very hard. Yet being 24/24 with your kids is much more draining and if you don't get to have a break ever it's because he doesn't take his part of the responsibility...

Leave him home alone and see how he likes it

I work part-time (on mat leave waiting for my second currently.) the days I'm home with my toddler are generally more challenging than work, though 1-2years was the thick of it... They're definitely easier now that he's 3, though I'd still say it's rougher than work days. Though my husband agrees with me and is happy to jump into parenting when he gets home from work. We both get relax time after my son is in bed, this is sometimes doing our own thing (him gaming, me crafting) or doing something together/chatting.

24/7 for sure. I’ve done SAHM with my first and now I’m the main breadwinner with our 3 kids and even working a demanding job and having multiple kids, it still feels easier .,,

I’ve done both and I find full time working a million times harder than i found being a SAHM. It depends on your job though, im a teacher so i never get a break from kids. My brains mush 24/7

being a parent is harder because you are taking care of a whole other person. And one that cant talk and say what they want. Most jobs only take a portion of the energy,mental and physical labor than parenting. Work is easier because your only responsible for taking care of yourself. Taking care of a kid is harder because you have to take care of yourself and another person. And no matter how you feel you HAVE to push through is for whatever the child needs

If I could afford to be home I wouldn't be working. When I was home with our oldest I was in heaven. If it didn't matter if I work then I would be home. I loved doing laundry daily, at 6 mo I got my groove back & the house was great bc I was home all the time. I had our oldest on a schedule by 5mo old sleeping 7 to 7 & 1 nap a day by 8 months, she didn't eat food until 9mo & we skipped puree bc she wanted my food & I know how important that is in food relationship development 🍎 I've been back to work since our 2nd was 6 weeks old due to finances. & she wasn't on a 7 to 7 until recently at 7 months old. She struggled with bottles for a bit & it was daunting. I was sleeping 6pm working so early PP. I've just now got a groove but my clean laundry cycle stays messy in the laundry room. My bedroom is a disaster. My oldest is in Kindergarten & sport & I have to navigate everything for the kids from sickness, visits, securing care for my oldest on off days, i compromise & work in daycare summer for my kids

That being said it is astronomically harder to be a working parent. Period. You work 8 hours & have to continue to work. You just want to sleep. If you worked I bet he would be more helpful. It was expected I do everything when I was sahm with my oldest. I went back when she was 15 months old lol

I think they both can be hard however being a parent should still be a shared responsibility and not a thing you can clock off from.

I say this when my girls dad has just cancelled second time in a week because he’s not had much sleep 🙃 I just think in all honesty we’ve got crappy baby daddies who don’t offer support. We should both get free time.

We have the same argument.

But I do see it from both sides. I think it’s harder for both.

Mamas go through building a baby, learning to take care of a human, and keep doing that for the rest of their lives.

Dadas are never expected to be very helpful. And because of that there aren’t very much resources for them to learn. They have to figure out how to deal with mamas hormones, a little human, on top of having to keep up with the life they’ve already got.

For us. Well at least for me. I had a choice. Have my baby, use my maternity leave, put baby in daycare and go back to work. Or give all of that up and stay home to raise my baby. And that was an easy choice I don’t regret it.

For dads, they don’t have one. They have to keep going to work. They need that income to provide. And now, instead of two steady incomes living comfortably with money leftover for the fun for the 2 of us. now There’s one income keeping up with the same living standards plus providing for one more.

Working full time you get lunch break and the hours after work finishes.

Parenting 24/7 your break is the small amount of time ur asleep. There is always something to do.

My husband is SAHD, I work. For me working is hard, and I work from home! Hubby wakes up late with baby, goes for walks, takes naps together, plays, watches TV…I’m up early, on meetings all day, stressed about work and making sure we can maintain the good life we have. Even though I think he has it easier, I wouldn’t trade places, he’s a better SAHP than I would be.

Having done both with various jobs, including 24/7 on call working in a combat deployment, I feel like parenting without a break is harder.
Just my opinion from my experience but yeah I'm grateful I get to stay home with my daughter but I'm also so ready for her to start school.

Being stay at home is 100% harder, his job is set hours, yours is 24/7. There are no sick days, no holidays, no scheduled breaks. Plus, you face things as a stay at home mum that would be literally illegal if his boss did to him (sleep deprivation, constant screaming, not being able to eat or go to the toilet in peace). After a rough weekend with the baby, my husband cannot wait to go back to work 🤣

Being a parent, your on shift 24/7. You don’t get to have payed holidays or days off or sick days off. You’re a cook, a nurse, a cleaner, a waiter, a teacher everything for your child/children.

Whenever someone who don’t have kids or someone who just goes to work tell me that they are tired. I get flustered and annoyed. Because try and be tired, still have to do everything ¬ getting no days off. You’re constantly tired & burnt out & still have to get on with it. & when you do need time to breathe, there’s nowhere to go.
Don’t get me wrong when someone who works can feel tired but not as tired as a parent who is doing everything.

Depending on what my working day is like and how my son's health is, it varies completely from day to day.

I don't work full time due to my own health issues and child care. In our house we share parenting and household responsibilities though my son usually wants me to do everything for him.

Tbh I can't really comment on working full time or parenting full time. I crawled into bed after a 10 hour shift last week. I've also crawled into bed because I've been running around with my son all day.

When my husband works away and I have to do both that is a challenge and totally exhausting. I don't know how single parents manage.

My husband says the same thing. He thinks playing with the kids is the same as giving me a break when I still have to change all the diapers, give all the baths, ect. Its exhausting...

My husband felt this way one day every early on my baby was probably 3 month or so. He always helped out but it was for small durations of time. I forgot exactly what he said but I pushed the bassinet and baby into the living room after I kicked him out to sleep there and shut and locked the room door. He said something about how the baby always spit up while talking shit to me from the couch and shit you not even 30 seconds later she spit up on him too lol. Then he stayed up with her for the first time all night. He had a change or perspective. When I went back to work he watched her for a full day and he has found a new appreciation for motherhood he had to tell me how difficult it is lol. Its not easy. Hasnt complained since lol