Postpartum

What all some ideas or tips for postpartum help when you don’t have a community?

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

You can always join a community! While I was pregnant my husband and I joined a church and it’s been super healing and supportive for us. A lot of churches will help with things like meal trains if you come to Sunday services and ask for support. You can also look into mama groups in your community. Preparing before you give birth is great too, like loving on your future self by prepping food and snacks for the freezer (soups, stews, congee, cookies, muffins), comfy pajamas, Sitz bath supplies, and a gratitude and memory journal. You can also talk with your partner ahead of time to make a game plan and clarify potential needs and expectations. For example, do you plan on staying in bed for the first two weeks? Could you see yourself desiring your back rubbed/tickled when you’re feeling overwhelmed and might ask for that a couple times in a day? Would you really like time to snuggle in as a family and pay for someone to help with laundry for a while?

What support does your partner anticipate needing physically and emotionally? Again, you can pay a young person $20 to come fold your laundry and/or do the dishes so you don’t have to worry about it and still feel put together and peaceful in your environment. Does he/she have family or friends who can support him/her emotionally through the ups and downs of having a newborn? You will both be so tired and need to understand how to take care of yourselves and each other and the new human you just brought home!

My father passed away when I was young and I lost my mother to mental illness and I didn’t have any other family near me aside from a younger sister or friends in the new town we moved to so we were mostly on our own. I did have an aunt fly out to help for a week and it was such a blessing.

in our community

Hour night wakes and 5am get up

Can anyone shed some light as to why on earth my child doesn’t want to sleep??? My eyeballs are bleeding!!

Never been a good sleeper, but the problems always changing. He’s nearly 9 months old.

Beginning of the month he dropped to 2 naps. We could put him to bed at 7pm and he’d get up for the day at 6am, with multiple wake ups every 2/3 hours.

Now we put him down at 7pm, he can do a good 4/5 hour stretch, but come 1/2am he’s up every hour then getting up for the day at 5am. This then completely messes up the day because I can’t keep him awake long enough to even get to 7pm, let alone later.

He has 2 naps, roughly about 1hr10 each but it changed based on when he wakes and trying to get him to a reasonable bed time.

What could be the reason for this? 6am is fine, but 5am is not 😩😩

AITA

In the uk there is an outbreak of meningitis, in a specific area mainly. My BD has family from that area and decided to go and meet up with them, I said if he does then he cannot have contact with the kids for 7-10 days after incase he picks anything up. Am I being over dramatic? I reallyyy don’t want my young kids getting anything serious

I think its fair

Me and my partner agreed to sleep in 1 day of the weekend.
He doesn't find it fair to look after both kids (my 4 year old isnt his) while i sleep so he looks after the baby while i sleep and my toddlers at his dads and ill look after both the next day.
Straightaway it was pretty unfair as i let him sleep in until he wakes up 10-12
He wakes me up when baby starts fussing because he wants milk (doesnt need it)
I cant pump as i dont supply enough.
So i get woken at 9/9:30 to feed baby then i get him sleep then theres no point sleeping in as my toddlers being dropped off.
I also find it unfair that i get both kids to sleep most night, i get my toddler to sleep everyday hes home (4/5days) and i get my baby to sleep most nights with the exception of maybe twice a month as his dad struggless then about 95% of his thru the day naps.
I have also been unwell for a few months (tumor scare) and am waiting 18 weeks to see a specialist so im obviously petrified for that, so unbelievably tired and alot of aches and pains, specifically these pounding headaches ive been having.
After i had been up til 11:30 getting both kids to sleep lastnight and my partner falling asleep at 10 then him ignoring the baby cries all morning until my toddler woke up im fed up slammed to door and rold him not to expect to sleep in unless he gets the baby to sleep the night b4.
I keep having issues with him not feeling the wet from baby being sick or weeing himself or being able to smell it do about 98% of the time hes given to me i have to clean him up n change him.
Including at night, we agreed my partner would change nappies (1 a night at 5am) while i feed (2,4,5,6:30) but every night when i get him hes pissed through and my partner gets annoyed when i wake him up n moan about it.
Then the morning after hes annoyed at how much washing there is (thats his job) and moans about how often i change myself (baby constantly shits thru and sicks on me) and baby
Honestly im just so tired all the time

Over supply of milk

I am nearly 5weeks postpartum and I have such a big over supply of BM.
Has anyone donated / sold their supply, if so where do you recommend for this?

Crawling and walking

So my girl is 9 months now and shes great at sitting up and stays on her tummy for awhile but she seems to have no interest in trying to move or crawl or bum shuffle. Shes a big baby always has been but I'm disabled and I feel like it's my fault she's not hitting milestones I feel like there's something I'm not doing and it's making me a bad mum

Night feeding in sleeping bag

Do you guys keep your baby in their sleeping bag when you feed them in the night, or do you take it off? I take it off as don’t want him to be too hot but then sometimes when he’s sleepy after his feed and I go to put it back on him he wakes up and is fussy. Not sure if I should just keep him in it?