Not retuning to work??

Hey all, I'm really considering not returning to work for a long while!! I'm due to go back in November, but I don't want to miss out on anything! What if she takes her first steps at nursery 😭 I work in the nursery she'll be attending but still!!

My problem is though, my partner earns around £49k a year, which means according to all the benefits calculators I've done I'm entitled to nothing more than child benefit, so it looks like I don't really have a choice as he doesn't bring home enough to pay for mortgage, bills, food, transport, baby, pets etc by himself!

So I'm wondering does anyone have any tips or suggestions, EITHER for how to not get too upset about missing any of her firsts - she'll be just under eight months when we go back so there's still going to be a lot of firsts to come - OR any ways of earning extra money while being a full time house wife and mummy?? (This is option is literally all I've wanted for about 15 years now 😅)

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My fiance earns 30k, so do I, so while he would cover all bills we wouldn't be able to do anything if I didn't return.
So I'm going back on reduced hours, luckily my boss has to allow it as they increased hours while I've been away 🙃

Were the same, my maternity runs out December 1st however I will be doing my 10 keeping in touch days in December so that’s 2 weeks full pay and then I have a week and half holiday im owed so planning January to go back when my lo is 9 half months; I’m right next door having her in the other baby room so it don’t cause to much attachment when it’s time to move to toddlers so I can go see her and see her through the window, but I also just want to cry at the thought of watching other babies all day and not mine! I know I’ll get used to it and happy I can have her with me! At our nursery we wouldn’t tell parents etc if they take first steps etc so hopefully if I didn’t see it I would think it was the first myself when I did and just have to think like this, it’s sad for the dads more who definitely won’t see if it happens there x

I’m in the same boat as you. Entitled to no other benefits and I work in a nursery too but I don’t want to go back I’d love to stay at home but we can’t afford for me to do so. It’s horrible to think about. X

I went back at 8.5m with my first and missed so much. She was with her nanny and grandad when I was at work though so they recorded a lot for me so I didn't "miss it", still made me sad though.

in our community

Family culture difference on money

Sorry this is long, I hope some of you get to the end and give advice!!!

So I’m a very thrifty person, things are tight at the moment, the cost of living crisis and my house is heated by oil so things are extortionate. We aren’t on the bread line but we aren’t flush, hubby might be made redundant so there is some financial pressure.

Sometimes I buy my sons something nicer, on the justification that I can sell it on after (♥️ vinted ♥️). I have also been planning on pretty much breaking even most of the baby things I bought from face book market place, side by crib, baby changing unit, etc.

Hubby and I have different money cultures with our families (he’s Indian, I’m British). I’m my family we don’t mix money, we would help each other out if someone was in trouble and will get each other gifts on special occasions. With hubby’s family money is much more fluid, they will give each other things worth thousands of £ just because.

Hubby’s brother bought him a new laptop and a new Google phone, he’s been very generous to hubby. Hubby hasn’t given the same back because brother is much richer.

Hubby and I mostly share finances. If it’s relevant I’m the higher earner.

Now to the point! My babies are so cute they’ve given hubby’s brother (currently single) baby rabies. He’s asked for our baby stuff when we’re done with it. He’s been so generous to hubby I feel really stingy saying no. But I’d never have bought some of the stuff if I wasn’t going to get a return on it - the thought makes me a bit anxious. If we gave all our baby stuff given the second hand value it still wouldn’t equal what the brother had given hubby.

I thought maybe I could give him some stuff but sell some stuff, but hubby said then his brother will just have to go out and buy that stuff, so I should name my price and ask his brother for the money. That makes me feel very uncomfortable, given how generous the brother has been to hubby.

So what do I do ladies? Give it all and suck it up? Give part of it and sell parts on Vinted/FB, or ask hubbys brother for money for it and be uncomfortable? Or do you see another solution?

No one is being entitled or rude here, just a culture difference I need to navigate.

My relationship is failing I feel so alone.. I need a girlfriend to talk to :(

I'm a sahm and I feel so stuck... anyone going through the same thing? I could really use someone to relate to and talk through this with. Feeling so vulnerable but if I don't I won't be able to pull myself out of this

Go to dinner ideas

Looking for recipes you use in your family that are not the traditional lasagna, shepards pie, ect

Going back to work!

Already thinking about this! Told my boss I was pregnant this week at 10 weeks, he was so happy for me. He’s recently became a first time Dad and was showing me pictures of his baby. I told him my plans about going back after 6 months and he looked at me like I was mad, am I!? I absolutely love my job and cannot imagine giving it up, I manage a team and am petrified my position won’t be there if I had a year off. My husband gets 6 months full pay so the plan would be for him to have the last 6 months off and I also made it clear to my boss that I would like to go part time. That way we can hopefully parent together 4/7 days rather than just the weekend! I am such an overthinking! 🤣 but this is what I’m struggling with the most, I’ve worked full time since I was 17 (12 years ago) and the max time I’ve had off in one go is 2 weeks when I got married. I’m sooo excited to be a Mum and we decided now was the right time, which it 100% is! But I feel so on edge about not working! I’m sure once I’m on maternity leave I won’t even think about work! Has anyone else felt the same?

What are we giving our soon-to-be 3yo for their birthdays?

We have the magnetiles, we have the kinetic sand and play doh, we have the play kitchen…

Literally, is there anything left in the world to buy this spoilt kid? 😅

Baby groups?

Hello there!!
I hope you enjoying the 5month babies 🫠 the cuteness outweighs everything over here.
We live in the area of Croydon & need to start going to baby groups ( I NEED it more than him though) but I am a little bit clueless. Any recommendations?
We are happy to travel a bit too.
Thanks ☺️