Really don’t know what to do anymore.

That’s not a partner……

Ignore his lil temper tantrum 🙄

Should I apologise I don’t know

Wow, I'm sorry you're dealing with that. I guess he doesn't know how your feeling with all the responsibility. And that your hormones are all over the place so dry is normal.
You're doing great, have a conversation when he's calm

He’s said I hope you are comfortable on your side. And we aren’t sexually comparable so let’s stop that side of things and I go to someone who does do it for me. I mean I’m having a really tough pregnancy and at this rate feel like im either going to mis carry because of the stress or end up being a single parent to 2 kids under 2.

I feel so alone

What a man child. Id tell him to go take a cold shower and chill pill and grow tf up. Sounds like the couch is a good place for him to sleep for a while tbh

It will be my fault tomorrow aswell for him sleeping all night on the sofa and I should have gone down to check on him, the man is 38 nearly

He sounds like an overly sensitive and insecure person and he’s taking it out on you (which is absolutely not okay).

He’s not entitled to ‘sexy time’, it’s something that should feel safe and intimate and if he’s not willing to treat it that way then it can be ‘just him and his hand’ 🙄

Disappearing off downstairs is all well and good, but he’s still a parent and should be helping you with your other child - especially as you’re pregnant.

I hope he realises how ‘in the wrong’ he is and steps up, what you need is support and a partner, not an insecure man child to look after 🙄

Sending love and positive vibes 🤍

Should I apologise

You have nothing to apologise for, he’s clearly insecure and not supporting you when you need him most. He needs to apologise to you, his behaviour is appalling

Absolutely not - your partner is the one who should apologise! He’s a grown man who chose to sleep on the sofa, who chose to start an argument with you and who has chosen to be selfish and unsupportive.

He needs to do some self-reflection and reassess his attitudes.

You’ve done nothing wrong, sleeping on your side because you’re more comfortable that way is reasonable. Until he grows a uterus and becomes the first man to carry a child, his opinion will continue to not matter on how you sleep.

This makes me so angry for you, you deserve better.

It’s the comment he said about gaslighting I said to him, that’s made me question everything now and be careful what I say which he responded with I’ve not made you do anything

It’s crazy that you would even consider apologizing, or that you are on your second child with someone who treats you like this 🙁 please leave him.

He is gaslighting you

I don’t even go about leaving and how my financials would work etc xx

This is obviously a man that still has the brain of a 18 year old. He sounds like a narcissist and very insecure. He is gaslighting you to make you feel like you’ve done something wrong, and is waiting for you to kiss his ass to make things better. Absolutely not. You did nothing wrong. Unfortunately, I know exactly how you are feeling and it isn’t fun. This is time to enjoy your pregnancy and if he can’t contribute to your happiness, don’t you dare let him take it away from you. You deserve to enjoy this moment. Just remember that when times get gray. The little ones are watching❤️

The citizens advice bureau should be able to help with advice if you’re seriously considering leaving him.

Gaslighting is literally defined as “manipulating someone using psychological methods into questioning or own sanity or powers of reasoning”. Only one of you sounds to be currently awake, questioning anything as a result of someone manipulative tactics (hint is, it’s not him). He’s gaslighting you by making you think you’ve created this situation. Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse - if this is something you wanted to chat to someone about, you could always look at this NHS page and there’s some links to organisations which can help. It also has some suggestions on what signs of different types of abuse are (emotional
Etc). https://www.nhs.uk/live-well/getting-help-for-domestic-violence/

How do I go about changing our child’s surname, they currently have his, and if I do that I don’t think I can claim maintenance

He is gaslighting you and his behavior is unacceptable! It's abuse! Especially during pregnancy!
I hope you can find a person to talk to, you can trust and who can be there for you and your children.

He’s come up now and said that I didn’t make an effort to go down to him and it’s always him trying to sort things out, and I don’t hug him in bed etc, and he thinks I’ll get bored. He also asked me if I would ever cheat on him, why would you ask someone that who you meant to care for, felt like he didn’t trust me.

This whole thing is absolutely unhinged and uncalled for. Like where is his head??

You don’t owe him sex and no one walks around 100% horny all the time like men lol he sounds young or immature and not in tune with how women’s bodies work. There’s nothing wrong with lube. Your hormones are all over the place now that you’re pregnant and you’re dealing w back to back pregnancies at that. Don’t apologize- he needs to grow up.

He’s insecure and acting out like a child 🙄

He sounds like he is trying to pick a fight. My mom used to say that when someone is pointing a finger at you, there is always a thumb pointing back at them. I wonder what is deflecting from to cause such a big fuss over nothing? Is this typical of him or out of nowhere?

No it’s typical of him we often have rows over nothing, like last week we had a row over our child wanting me more rather than him, and he went into a sulk saying she was rejecting him

Hearing more of what he has done in the past all points to extreme insecurity. Has he always been this way? Is it getting worse? You are pregnant with his child why the heck is he thinking you would cheat?! The fact you asked if you should say sorry makes me think you do this often to keep the peace which sadly is only going to make him do this to you more because each time he gets more power from you. Speak your truth and let him know he is acting insecure for no reason and also making you feel uncomfortable being intimate with him when he critiques everything about how it goes. That would be enough to dry me up and turn my back too!

It sounds like the wine brought out his insecurities. If anything, it sounds like he is gaslighting you. I would hope when he sobers, he will recognize that he went over the top.

I’m going to keep it plain and simple.
Drunken mind ALWAYS speaks the truth
He doing reverse psychology on you, he’s actually gaslighting you.
He’s highly insecure.

Wow, he sounds like a right arsehole! I'd have been fuming if my partner spoken to me like this when I was pregnant!

Has he been cheated on in the past? Or has he cheated on someone? He seems fixated on this fear of you cheating on him and on the fear of him not satisfying you.. so where does that fear stem from? He also needs some lessons in female biology, like we can't just turn on the waterworks when our hormones are focused on building a tiny human...

He's a k**b. I'd kick him out you can manage 2 children on your own just fine 😊👍

Not based on reality, the advice of others or what you think may be likely to happen....just think If you had a magic wand, what do you truly want for you, for your relationship and for your children?