Relatives Kissing your baby

My little one was born in Jan. She was 6 weeks early and in neonatal for 12 days because her lungs hadn’t fully developed.
We initially said no kissing because of that, plus RSV season, but now I have said no kissing until she is old enough to say whether or not she wants a kiss or to give a kiss. I want her to know that she doesn’t have to give or accept kisses if she doesn’t want to. I’ve explained to grandparents in particular that it’s not about them, it’s about the bigger picture for my child’s safety.

I’d say around 6 months is when I’m going to be a bit more lenient with it. My mother in law kissed my baby numerous times when she was only 5 weeks old. It’s our fault though because we didn’t make it very clear to her not to do it (you’d think it’d be common sense but clearly not 😂) but yeah, im going to allow it from 6 months I think, never on the lips!!! But hands, face & head etc. if a family member wasn’t respecting the boundaries after being told, I wouldn’t allow that family member to hold the baby again x

I'm sorry, but how disrespectful is it not to let your husband's grandparent kiss his baby 🤨 you can have whatever boundaries you like with your own family but I think it is up to your husband if he wants his grandmother to kiss his baby!

spitting? What a ridiculous comment. People are not spitting at babies when they are kissing them!

We’ve all kissed mine really since she arrived - maybe not the boy teen cousins but the rest have.

it’s absolutely not up to him it’s up to both of them as parents and if one doesn’t want people spreading their germs all over their baby putting them at risk then the other should accept that. Not letting people kiss your baby isn’t harming anyone, so what if it upsets a couple of family members,letting people kiss them can harm baby and they would be a hell of a lot more upset if the baby ended up in hospital because of them. She’s baby’s mum and whatever her boundaries are they should be respected whether people agree with them or not. I’m not letting anyone kiss my baby full stop until she’s old enough to decide for herself, like others have said it’s weird and unnecessary

@Emma it is not weird at all. People who think it is weird are weird themselves. It is called a sign of affection!

Thanks Rachel, much appreciated advice. ❤️

There’s plenty of other ways of showing affection without kissing someone! Particularly this time of year with all the germs going around! My friends daughter ended up in a coma from someone kissing her, she nearly lost her! So I’m sorry but you’re completely wrong and your the weird one for thinking there’s an issue with a mother wanting to protect their baby!

Rachel seems like a lovely individual…

Tbh I stopped this rule, except for no kisses on the lips. I realised that I couldn’t control it and gave up

as a scientist, I can tell you that others kissing babies under the age of 6 months is risky due to the transmission of HSV, RSV and other illnesses. That’s why it is recommended that parents only kiss their babies for the first while. If you like to take risks then that’s up to you but I don’t want your comments on my post unless you’re answering my question… which you’re not.

I fell out with my mum over this as she disregarded and disrespected me about this. She threatened she would never visit again to which I said ok. We didnt speak for 3 months i believe.

Eventually she got the picture and didnt kiss him again. Now he’s a lot older i dont mind a little kiss on the head but not the face.

Also if anyone has coldsores they’re on a ban again

wet potato 🤣🤣

My rule will forever be no kissing, you can only kiss on the head from around 4 months old and that's how it shall stay. Me and baby's dad can kiss him on the cheek, but even then I tell my baby I'm going to, or ask his permission. Now he's old enough, I've told everyone to even ask him before a cuddle, if he doesn't want to, offer a high 5 instead and if he doesn't want to do that just say "ok no problem!"

Some might say that's too much, but we all want the best for our children so do whatever you feel is right mama!

I allowed close family members or close friends kiss my daughter from 12 weeks old (after her third round of jabs). I still don’t allowed extended family or acquaintances to kiss her just down to nervousness and not being 100% sure if they’d be honest if they were poorly. I don’t understand why people, regardless of who they are don’t respect boundaries🙃x

Never will stop. Don’t kiss my kid. That’s the #1 way of spreading stuff you don’t know you have. Esp with RSV being so prone this year.

I will specify there’s a couple instances I’ve allowed it - like grandma kissing his cheek for a photo. However I didn’t even allow this until 6 months.

@Alexandra which of your family members kiss like dogs then? Because mine just use their lips, not their tongues 🤨

My baby is 15 months and no one kiss him really. I think untill he is 2 and also I don't think it's so necessary.
I mean, between adults when we kiss (unless it's romantic) we usually give the cheeck. We are not using lips that much. Bit when people kiss babies they always put lips over them. I kind of think it's gross ahahahahhaha
Well everyone here respects our boundaries and they should respects yours as well

@Alexandra that comment was actually aimed at the OP, not you. But obviously, you think the world revolves around you 🙄 No one has ever or would ever kiss my child if they had a cold sore as that is just common sense.

I’ve never allowed kissing on my baby from ANYONE. Yes it’s a way to show affection, to show love and it can come off as harmless but it’s just not. You simply don’t know what others have, whether they have an outbreak or not. I’m just not willing to risk my baby get sick or anything else. I think some people get confused on who baby this is, and boundaries are okay. I honestly would rarely bring my baby around if I were you since they don’t listen.

FYI… HSV is transmitted with or without symptoms of a coldsore. If the individual is a carrier they can also be asymptomatic. Educate yourself please before you start giving your opinion. I personally don’t give a flying shit about someone’s affection towards my child when their health is more important than a slobbery kiss… yes, slobbery because guess what Rachel!? Kisses of any form do in fact transfer saliva and that’s >700 types of bacteria and organisms living in the saliva. So, slobbery (meaning wet by definition) would be the correct term