I miss how life was before baby

Don't get me wrong, I love my baby more than life itself and am in awe of her every day. But I really miss how my life was before she got here. I miss how my relationship was with my partner (we're working great as a team now, but I'm meaning the spontaneity that comes with having free time together!), I miss my job that I worked so hard to do well in, I miss feeling happy and confident in my own skin. I was never a person to cry but now hormones seem to rule every thought I have and this usually results in floods of tears, even 4 weeks pp. And I'm just sick of being so tired 😅
She wasn't a planned baby but we were both very excited when we found out about her. But I feel like I didn't make time during pregnancy to really get my head round it all so I'm now in autopilot/survival mode, and it almost feels like being in shock whilst trying to keep this little precious baby alive.

I don't feel like I'm depressed, I just have frequent thoughts of wishing things were how they used to be. I'm looking forward to establishing a new normal where I feel as happy about life as I did before! Anyone else feeling like this?

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I feel you completely. I was looking at my old videos and pictures the other day mourning the life I’d lost and the person I was. Now as a mum, looking back at myself then, im so grateful to now be a mum, my little girl literally saved me. I don’t feel like im depressed either but I’ve definitely started to embrace my new life, at 2 months old there’s not much we can do but come summer time, life will properly start. play dates and days out, I cannot wait 🫶🏻🫶🏻

I'm with you in all of those feelings.
My baby wasn't expected either, and we did talk about termination, but I'm so glad he's here now. I wasn't with my partner for long before I got pregnant, and I had only been in my job a few months. I do miss my life before him, and some days I have grieved for the life I could have had, and I cry so much over everything including my guilt for feeling like that.
But then I hold him in my arms, and I just love him so much. I even got my first proper smile this morning which just made all of it worth it.
It will pass with time, we will get through it. There are so many adventures ahead and so many memories to be made!
Sending hugs x

I get this 100% this is exactly how I felt with my first born you grieve your old life and independence you don’t realise how much life changes with a baby. In time you’ll get use to your new normal but you’ll still look back and think how easy life was before. I was so scared I’d feel similar after my second grieving the simplicity of just one child but I’ve not felt that at all my second has just slotted right into our family life and postpartum experience has been completely different for the better as I’m not grieving my old life anymore in fact I’m probably embracing motherhood even more and loving it.

Its completely normal to miss the old person/people you were.
My son is 3 next week and I have a 7wk old but I sometimes still drift into a mode of thinking about my days I lived alone, was single and just doing anything I wanted when I wanted... that was 5yrs ago! But then I get a smile off my kids or a laugh and I realise how lucky I am when so many aren't.
It'll creep up on you but then go again. It's normal. And having a child doesn't mean you have to stop everything. Last year me, partner and son (I was pregnant) had a weekend or night away every month...camping, a cruise, stayed in middle of nowhere and loads of days out. 😀 it's just about survivung these first 12-16wks and it's alot easier.

Hormones are wild, with my first I spent a week in the hospital and I couldn't even remember my life before baby but I knew I missed it. It's much easier with my second because I know what fun is to come and that gets me through but I still have times where I ask my husband what have we done, we were so so happy with our eldest, life was great, our relationship was so good. But, we know that the fun to come will be worth it x

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Help! First time mum -

I have a 4 month old and now all of a sudden when he’s been asleep for 1hr30/2hrs he will wake up screaming (high pitched) I’ve tried winding him sometimes that helps, I’ve tried bicycle legs & bringing his knees up but that doesn’t seem to help but he brings his knees up himself sometimes but nothing happens. I’ve noticed since the 4 month mark he has started to struggle passing wind downwards! Any tips?

Hour night wakes and 5am get up

Can anyone shed some light as to why on earth my child doesn’t want to sleep??? My eyeballs are bleeding!!

Never been a good sleeper, but the problems always changing. He’s nearly 9 months old.

Beginning of the month he dropped to 2 naps. We could put him to bed at 7pm and he’d get up for the day at 6am, with multiple wake ups every 2/3 hours.

Now we put him down at 7pm, he can do a good 4/5 hour stretch, but come 1/2am he’s up every hour then getting up for the day at 5am. This then completely messes up the day because I can’t keep him awake long enough to even get to 7pm, let alone later.

He has 2 naps, roughly about 1hr10 each but it changed based on when he wakes and trying to get him to a reasonable bed time.

What could be the reason for this? 6am is fine, but 5am is not 😩😩

Don’t want to leave my first born😭😭😭

Anyone else extremely sad and anxious to leave their first born😭

He’s 2 and we have never not put him to bed or be here for when he wakes up😭

I’m so sad and anxious about leaving him

Help meeee

!!All advice welcome!! My 5 month old (nearly 6mo) is just not sleeping . Not for naps and not at night . She can’t connect her cycles . We started sleep regression at 3 months but in like how is this nearly been going on for a further 3 months . Like surely not . She has 10 min naps in crib ( which take so much effort ) and maybe 20/30 min naps in my arms/pushchair . She wakes minimum every hour at night with guaranteed false start 20 mins in . I combo feed. I breastfeed her until almost asleep then place her in the next to me crib give her the pacifier and put my hand on her cheek/face for 20 seconds and she drifts off . It’s not really getting her to sleep that’s the issue it’s she just won’t stay asleep . She doesn’t even need to feed much at night usually 1-2 breastfeeds . The rest is comfort wakes needing her pacifier or my hand on her cheek . I’ve looked into sleep associations and independent sleep and I broke the feed to sleep association and rocking and do bedside comforting instead for most wakes which has now lead to my hand being a sleep association on her face . I’m just so exhausted my husband is working mon-fri 9-9 and it’s just me . I haven’t had more than 4 hours in a row since her birth . I can’t get anything done during the day . She is so clingy and cries if I leave room /put her down etc. I love her so much but we both need rest . If anyone has any tips or a routine that could help PLEASE tell me I’ll try anything 🥲❤️❤️

Feeding to sleep

FTM here! 👋

Are you guys feeding your baby to sleep?

I just read feeding to sleep is creating bad habit and baby will always cry etc when awake at night expecting to get bottle before falling asleep again. 🤔
It said should feed the baby, give a bath (or not) and then put to sleep.
I do other way around - bath, pjs/lotion, rock to sleep and feed at the same time and then baby falling asleep.
Am I creating a bad habit? Been doing it all the time really. 😳

Feeds

How many times a night are your little ones getting up? My daughter is every 90-110 minutes. I am absolutely exhausted and don’t know how much more I can cope