To give a bit of background story… my husband and I have been together for 10 years and married for 5. We have a 1 year old and have been through A LOT due to his immigration status in the past, meaning I left my life behind in order to help him with his situation at the time and I’d say we’ve been happily together ever since. Recently his uncle got into some trouble and ended up getting arrested (won’t go into details but it’s not looking good for him). He’s been sulking around like it’s his problem to fix and he has to deal with it for some reason even though it’s absolutely nothing to do with him since his uncle got his own kids, wife, etc. I told him I was sorry that this was going on but at the end of the day it was his uncle’s fault since something similar had already happened in the past and he got away with it and that since he didn’t learn his lesson then he would just have to deal with the consequences this time. My husband then proceeded to tell me that I was saying and thinking this was because I’m “not family”.. I was completely taken aback with what he has just said. He said he didn’t mean it like that and instead he only meant that I didn’t know him my whole life. I just walked away and thanked him for letting me know I wasn’t his family but… that was a pretty shitty thing to say to your wife who you’ve met 10 years ago, went through hell with you, stood by you at your worst and helped you when no one gave a shit. Do you think I’m overreacting?? What would you have done in my situation?
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What he said was quite hurtful, and you're absolutely justified in being upset. But on the other hand, it may be that he was quite upset about his uncle and may not have gotten his words right. Talk to him and let him know how you feel and see what he has to say.

Sorry that definitely is a hurtful thing to hear and for him to say, playing the devil’s advocate here but maybe he means you’re not family as in his extended family that would probably feel the sense of obligation toward his uncle, because you’re not related to his uncle directly. As in you’d say different if that was your uncle? Also you mentioned his immigration status not sure both your backgrounds but maybe he’s from a culture that is very dependent on extended family etc. similar to my background we’d probably have the similar sense of obligation especially if it’s a man etc.
I would say give him time to cool. Let him
Know how his words hurt you and how you can move past it without it hurting your family life.