Shared parental leave

I’ve just had a panic about shared parental leave. I’ve filled in the forms for my school and I’m confident with all the dates etc. I’ve had the horrible thought that maybe the Occupational Pay isn’t paid during shared parental leave?! I can see any mention of it in the school policy, but surely they’ll still pay me the 45% of my salary? Does anyone have experience?

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The only thing it says is “OMP will not be payable to the partner of the mother where SPL is being taken”

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From what I’ve been told you have to wait for occupational/enhanced pay to run out before you start shared parental leave or it will stop and you’ll go down to SMP?

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Ffs 😩 I convinced myself it would still be paid and scheduled it to be sent to my head and HR for the morning. I guess I’ll find out when we have a meeting. My thought was that by saying the OMP won’t be paid to the partner, it implies that it will still be paid to me.

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Have you used the website? They’re meant to be very good at helping with all of this?

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I left it too late for my SPL to start after Easter. I guess I’ll find out when I have a meeting with HR.

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I really recommend using the SPL website for teachers, they work out the best time for you to take the leave and fill all the forms in for you. I'm sure they've worked mine out where I start SPL when I'm on 50% + SMP as it falls over the school holidays so I'm better off forgoing that and getting full pay

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Unless your school has a separate policy for SPL and offers Occupational/Enhanced Shared Parental Pay, rather than just Occupational/Enhanced Maternity Pay, you lose any further Occupational/Enhanced Pay when you curtail your Maternity Leave unfortunately. So when you go on to SPL after curtailing mat leave and having your 'return to work' period, you will get ShPP, which is the same amount as Statutory Maternity Pay, not carry on the previous schedule of Enhanced pay.

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Once you move to SPL you cannot receive OMP even if you haven’t received it all.

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Family culture difference on money

Sorry this is long, I hope some of you get to the end and give advice!!!

So I’m a very thrifty person, things are tight at the moment, the cost of living crisis and my house is heated by oil so things are extortionate. We aren’t on the bread line but we aren’t flush, hubby might be made redundant so there is some financial pressure.

Sometimes I buy my sons something nicer, on the justification that I can sell it on after (♥️ vinted ♥️). I have also been planning on pretty much breaking even most of the baby things I bought from face book market place, side by crib, baby changing unit, etc.

Hubby and I have different money cultures with our families (he’s Indian, I’m British). I’m my family we don’t mix money, we would help each other out if someone was in trouble and will get each other gifts on special occasions. With hubby’s family money is much more fluid, they will give each other things worth thousands of £ just because.

Hubby’s brother bought him a new laptop and a new Google phone, he’s been very generous to hubby. Hubby hasn’t given the same back because brother is much richer.

Hubby and I mostly share finances. If it’s relevant I’m the higher earner.

Now to the point! My babies are so cute they’ve given hubby’s brother (currently single) baby rabies. He’s asked for our baby stuff when we’re done with it. He’s been so generous to hubby I feel really stingy saying no. But I’d never have bought some of the stuff if I wasn’t going to get a return on it - the thought makes me a bit anxious. If we gave all our baby stuff given the second hand value it still wouldn’t equal what the brother had given hubby.


I thought maybe I could give him some stuff but sell some stuff, but hubby said then his brother will just have to go out and buy that stuff, so I should name my price and ask his brother for the money. That makes me feel very uncomfortable, given how generous the brother has been to hubby.

So what do I do ladies? Give it all and suck it up? Give part of it and sell parts on Vinted/FB, or ask hubbys brother for money for it and be uncomfortable? Or do you see another solution?

No one is being entitled or rude here, just a culture difference I need to navigate.

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