Not MIL but own Mother

So probably about September/October my fiancé and I had come conversation about me be coming a SAHM because our 2 boys need me home more. I said something to my mom about it and at first she was on board. About a month goes by and she says to me “I know you want to stay home but you guys can’t afford that” like she knows what we can and cannot afford…trust me we have broken it down. Would a lifestyle change be needed? Yes…could we do it…MOST DEFINITELY YES….about the time she said this to me my Fiancé and I had decided we wanted a third baby and if I was going to be a SAHM we needed to try and have #3 while I’m still working and just won’t go back after maternity leave. My mom makes comments about us financially constantly even though she knows nothing about our bank account AND just assumes that my fiancé (WHO SHE DISLIKES BTW) makes shit for money (HE DOES NOT) My dad told me after #2 that I should have had my tubes tied and they both have said “we won’t help with a third”. My dad also doesn’t think my fiancé has a “Real Job and Career” (He’s a repo agent. He “steals” cars for a living when people don’t pay their car payments)
My mom has also made comments “you have your hands full” “Idk how you do it with 2” … I JUST DO…

I just found out a week ago that I am pregnant. I’m freaking out about telling them. I feel like a teenager about to tell them she’s pregnant at 16 even though I’m a damn adult that makes her own decisions 😬🤦🏼‍♀️ It’s more telling them I’m going to be a SAHM that bothering me over the actual pregnant part.
I can hear my dad getting instantly pissed off about it ☹️

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Just don’t tell them until they can see it or hear from someone else. And when they ask why you haven’t told them you say they didn’t support you emotionally enough for you to feel comfortable to tell them. You don’t owe them anything as your kids don’t owe you nothing. Do what makes you feel comfortable only. Period

If I was you I wouldn’t tell them anything anymore. Clearly they have nothing nice to say about your family. You’re a grown woman, they don’t assist you in any way, so I don’t understand why they moan about your decisions when it comes to your family? You and your family deserve respect and not being treated like a child.

Stop talking about your marital decisions with your mom and dad.
Your decisions are yours only.
It is your family, not theirs. They already raised their children
Nobody else’s opinion should dictate what you do with your family.

I would do the nicest pregnancy announcement; congratulations by the way. Get a photo shoot done (even if you do it yourself) and give your parents a card with a lovely picture inside. That way you can look back and think we did a really lovely announcement for our third (maybe your last the way your post reads) and if your parents are upset- that’s their problem and they’re allowed to have their big feelings about it

I would be putting mum straight, but at the end of the day it isn't her business and you do what's best for you and your family. It also sounds like she's a little jealous.

in our community

Family culture difference on money

Sorry this is long, I hope some of you get to the end and give advice!!!

So I’m a very thrifty person, things are tight at the moment, the cost of living crisis and my house is heated by oil so things are extortionate. We aren’t on the bread line but we aren’t flush, hubby might be made redundant so there is some financial pressure.

Sometimes I buy my sons something nicer, on the justification that I can sell it on after (♥️ vinted ♥️). I have also been planning on pretty much breaking even most of the baby things I bought from face book market place, side by crib, baby changing unit, etc.

Hubby and I have different money cultures with our families (he’s Indian, I’m British). I’m my family we don’t mix money, we would help each other out if someone was in trouble and will get each other gifts on special occasions. With hubby’s family money is much more fluid, they will give each other things worth thousands of £ just because.

Hubby’s brother bought him a new laptop and a new Google phone, he’s been very generous to hubby. Hubby hasn’t given the same back because brother is much richer.

Hubby and I mostly share finances. If it’s relevant I’m the higher earner.

Now to the point! My babies are so cute they’ve given hubby’s brother (currently single) baby rabies. He’s asked for our baby stuff when we’re done with it. He’s been so generous to hubby I feel really stingy saying no. But I’d never have bought some of the stuff if I wasn’t going to get a return on it - the thought makes me a bit anxious. If we gave all our baby stuff given the second hand value it still wouldn’t equal what the brother had given hubby.

I thought maybe I could give him some stuff but sell some stuff, but hubby said then his brother will just have to go out and buy that stuff, so I should name my price and ask his brother for the money. That makes me feel very uncomfortable, given how generous the brother has been to hubby.

So what do I do ladies? Give it all and suck it up? Give part of it and sell parts on Vinted/FB, or ask hubbys brother for money for it and be uncomfortable? Or do you see another solution?

No one is being entitled or rude here, just a culture difference I need to navigate.

My relationship is failing I feel so alone.. I need a girlfriend to talk to :(

I'm a sahm and I feel so stuck... anyone going through the same thing? I could really use someone to relate to and talk through this with. Feeling so vulnerable but if I don't I won't be able to pull myself out of this

What are we giving our soon-to-be 3yo for their birthdays?

We have the magnetiles, we have the kinetic sand and play doh, we have the play kitchen…

Literally, is there anything left in the world to buy this spoilt kid? 😅

Go to dinner ideas

Looking for recipes you use in your family that are not the traditional lasagna, shepards pie, ect

Is it just me?

I’m 35. I have a 21 month old and i’m 5 months pregnant. I have no friends. Everyone has either drifted away or ghosted me. I don’t know what i’ve done but i’m so lonely now. My best friend of 20 years has ghosted me and i’m heartbroken. I’ve tried to reach out to other friends but never get anywhere. I don’t know how to make new friends. I honestly just feel so alone.

Baby groups?

Hello there!!
I hope you enjoying the 5month babies 🫠 the cuteness outweighs everything over here.
We live in the area of Croydon & need to start going to baby groups ( I NEED it more than him though) but I am a little bit clueless. Any recommendations?
We are happy to travel a bit too.
Thanks ☺️