Feeling guilty for having two kids.. anyone else??

I just had a baby a month ago i loved being a mom to one! My oldest is 18 months i absolutely think its so easy to have one.. i can go shopping/ park/ ect now i have two i only go shopping when my oldest in daycare.. i love having only one child anyone else feels like this.. i feel such a horrible mom for thinking this way

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I’m sorry you feel that way. I waited so long to have another that it’s going to be like I just have one all over again but for me that makes me sad, I know it’ll help because my toddler can be a lot especially with the dog, but I wanted them to bond and be able to take them both out. Now I’ll feel guilty that she will be in school for the first time while I get to take her brother out and about. But I also felt guilty when she would cry that she has no siblings and no one to play with that’s a kid. It really broke my heart. I think that’s just life, we can’t always win and it’s just all about finding your comfort zone and what you are willing to handle and do to make your days better as they go. But every feeling is valid

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aww you make me feel better mama😢thank you so much and i see your baby is 5 thats a good age gap

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I felt this way with my third. She was an oops baby I got pregnant 5 months postpartum from having my son. I often think I was a better mom with one kid as well. Things were so much easier, I agree with you. I appreciate and love my kids but some days I wish I could go back. So you're not alone in your feelings.

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Feel this. One kid was magic two kids is tiring. Mine are exactly 2 years apart. I get this

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i got pregnant 6 months pp😭yesss i feel you

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right 😭i dont have the energy to run after a toddler with a newborn

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I kind of sorta feel the same way, my 2nd son was born a month ago and yet I haven’t left the house (by choice) until he turned 1m but I dread doing anything w/o my bf. My first son is 3 so I can only imagine how you feel with having a younger bby.
I do feel guilty for not being able to be as interactive with my oldest. He always asks to do something and I’m always having to say “one second” or “not right now”

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Family culture difference on money

Sorry this is long, I hope some of you get to the end and give advice!!!

So I’m a very thrifty person, things are tight at the moment, the cost of living crisis and my house is heated by oil so things are extortionate. We aren’t on the bread line but we aren’t flush, hubby might be made redundant so there is some financial pressure.

Sometimes I buy my sons something nicer, on the justification that I can sell it on after (♥️ vinted ♥️). I have also been planning on pretty much breaking even most of the baby things I bought from face book market place, side by crib, baby changing unit, etc.

Hubby and I have different money cultures with our families (he’s Indian, I’m British). I’m my family we don’t mix money, we would help each other out if someone was in trouble and will get each other gifts on special occasions. With hubby’s family money is much more fluid, they will give each other things worth thousands of £ just because.

Hubby’s brother bought him a new laptop and a new Google phone, he’s been very generous to hubby. Hubby hasn’t given the same back because brother is much richer.

Hubby and I mostly share finances. If it’s relevant I’m the higher earner.

Now to the point! My babies are so cute they’ve given hubby’s brother (currently single) baby rabies. He’s asked for our baby stuff when we’re done with it. He’s been so generous to hubby I feel really stingy saying no. But I’d never have bought some of the stuff if I wasn’t going to get a return on it - the thought makes me a bit anxious. If we gave all our baby stuff given the second hand value it still wouldn’t equal what the brother had given hubby.


I thought maybe I could give him some stuff but sell some stuff, but hubby said then his brother will just have to go out and buy that stuff, so I should name my price and ask his brother for the money. That makes me feel very uncomfortable, given how generous the brother has been to hubby.

So what do I do ladies? Give it all and suck it up? Give part of it and sell parts on Vinted/FB, or ask hubbys brother for money for it and be uncomfortable? Or do you see another solution?

No one is being entitled or rude here, just a culture difference I need to navigate.

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Advice

Hi everyone! I honestly have 0 social queues when it comes to talking to anyone in general. I definitely have a hard time talking to other women and making new friends. I can 100% relate. I just don’t like the idea of texting or meeting up but when I do I’m like “oh this isn’t bad.” Any advice? I also have a hard time getting comfortable and just feeling judged by other women😅 I’m also 19 so maybe making a change in this now will help in the future making mom friends/friends in general. Thanks in advance!

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Hi Mums

I live in New Zealand and I’m really keen on finding a regular best friend to chat with. It’s incredibly lonely. I love Australia and I think it would be fantastic to have friends there. If you’re comfortable with long-distance friendships we could meet up in New Zealand. I also want someone to video call because I currently have no friends every single day. I feel really lonely because I don’t have a nice family. I just want friends to become family one day and of course I need to trust them first which is why I’m making this post. I just got married 🥹👰❤️

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My relationship is failing I feel so alone.. I need a girlfriend to talk to :(

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