I really need some advice please as I am struggling here. I posted parts of this story yesterday but feel I didn’t explain it the right way nor in full. I’m 29 and me & my husband have been together for 11 years. We have 4 kids, the youngest is 10 months. A few days ago me and my husband got into a big argument and I brought up him being friends with an ex of his on Facebook. I only realized because he posted a pic and she loved it. He has also liked/loved a few of her posts (not pictures) he didn’t reach out to her but has shown attention by liking some of her stuff. The part that has me upset is that he said he understands why I would worry because she is attractive to him and if we were to separate he would entertain/approach her. This really hurt me deep and I just need to know others opinion. Am I overreacting by being upset by this, to the point I think about it and it makes me upset? Just hearing him say that made me feel super insecure because I already kinda was seeing that he added her in the first place.
Screenshot of text from him in comments!
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Learn more about our guidelines.For anyone who has read this far, thank you. I just have to add, my husband did try reaching out to her before when we were about 1.5/2 years into our relationship. (She hardly responded because she knew he had a gf) Other than that I have not seen any other interactions over all these years. But this is a reason that I’m feeling insecure, because it’s someone from his past and he has tried reaching out before (although it was many years ago) I used to feel secure in my relationship and felt like nothing or no one could break us. I used to feel so confident & like I was irreplaceable. I don’t imagine being with anyone else. I’m so in love with my husband I don’t see anyone but him & If we were to separate I feel I wouldn’t be interested in anyone. I feel for him it’s the opposite.

Why did they break up to begin with? Is she like the one that got away and he never truly got over her? I would feel like some secondhand choice if I were you and that sounds so awful I couldn't stand it. You should be first choice, love of his life, mother of his children. I appreciate him being so candid and apologizing but it doesn't change the truth of the matter. Since he is being so honest I would dig deeper and ask more questions to get some resolve here....like are you second choice? Or if you left him would he be regretful and wanting you back or just go straight for this girl?

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