Please tell me I’m not the TOXIC one….

Strip clubs?

How do you ladies feel about it and do you let your husband go? Why or why not?

In my eyes it’s just disrespectful. I find it even more disrespectful when his family knows how I feel about it and still try to invite him and or make jokes about it.

Read more on Peanut

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

Learn more about our guidelines.
Add a comment
Avatar

I don’t let mine go to any nor will I ever and if that makes me insecure or boring oh welllll, I guess I’ll be boring and insecure til I d!e 😭🤣

Avatar

Not toxic, it's not something I like the idea of my partner going to either. Facts are that shady shit goes on there on both ends. My ex went once got black out drunk, somehow dropped a grand in the VIP room...wth happened in there I never found out. He was shady to me anyway...

The person I am with now has never gone to one while we are together, but i also trust him so much like he would never lie to me. If he ever did go for some reason like a bachelor party or something I would still trust him but I would also still not like it lol

Avatar

Personally, I couldn't care less, lol, but I always expect the same respect to me if I wanted to go to something like that. I don't ever see my husband ever wanting to just go. But if it was for like a bachelor party or something like that, he'd ask me if it was okay, and I'd say yes. Those ladies at the club don't want our men. They are just trying to make a living. Hell, I'd go with him if he let me 🤣 but that's just how I am and what I'm comfortable with.

BUT, if you are not comfortable with them, your husband should respect your feelings, and his family should as well...its also weird that his family asks all the time and it gives me the ick if he doesn't ask them to stop because you're uncomfortable. You're not toxic for not wanting to be outside of your comfort zone and never forget that. It doesn't make people insecure for not liking it. You're allowed to have boundaries.

Avatar

🤣😂🤣 hard facts, them girls don't want our men, they are just trying to get paid.

Avatar

I'm on the same page as with this one. My husband isn't one to do it on a regular basis, heck I don't think he has actually been to one our entire time of being together (12 years). He has mentioned wanting to take me to one though we just never did before the kid
😂 Oh well.

Avatar

I can't imagine trying to control my husband going to a strip club because if I had to worry about it at all, he's not the right man for me. He only ever goes for bachelor parties - so if it were more than that/super frequent, I'd have a reason to be concerned, and like I said - he wouldn't be my ideal partner and we wouldn't be together. I always tell him don't do anything you wouldn't want me to do, and we're solid!

Avatar

mine doesn’t go bc he wouldn’t want me going , when i say i won’t let mine I rlly should’ve stated I’ve never had to worry about it bc it’s never came up and bc he wouldn’t want me to do it I know he wouldn’t out of respect! Which is what matters most -respect! 💕

Avatar

I’m going with him

Avatar

I feel like it’s another thing watching but going and getting a lap dance and then the stripper letting them touch her? How is this not cheating?

Read more on Peanut

Trending

in our community

Is this normal

Let’s say you’re at a softplay with your 2 year old, and some friends & their toddlers.
You buy your 2 year old a kids meal - chicken nuggets, beans, and chips. They’re very happy with it and have almost eaten it all.
They’re sat at the table, fork in hand, consistently eating, and have one chicken nugget left.
Your adult friend comes over from behind you, picks up the last chicken nugget, and eats it.
There was no indication that your child wasn’t going to eat it, and they didn’t ask. They just took it with no warning and ate it right in front of you and your toddler.
How you reacting?

Avatar

1

17

Are these men ok?

I get so sad seeing all the posts on here daily about women dealing with partners who are treating them horribly. I know it seems over represented because those of us with great partners don’t need to write posts asking for help, but I really hope most of us don’t have these kinds of men in our lives!

I tell my husband about these posts I see sometimes and he’s even shocked by some of the things these guys say/do.

Nobody’s perfect, and every relationship takes work. And becoming parents is a stress test unlike any other for sure, but seeing how many women get stuck in these relationships with men who aren’t interested in being better is so so sad😞

But is/was your partner helpful, loving, and supportive during your pregnancy/PP/etc? Was he a wonderful person but changed for the worst after becoming a parent? Has he put effort into becoming the partner you need him to be, even if he struggles?

Avatar

6

Car issues

Idk if I’m in the wrong. I have a full time job. My husband takes care of the kids while I worked. Today was the day I was supposed to get us a car. But I couldn’t cause of the down payment. So now he’s texting me saying I’m wasting his day to be alone at Walmart so he can spend his tax return. I really want to say go ahead. Leave. Leave the kids and me alone. While you go out and spend money. While your at go ahead and buy urself your drugs and a bitch to go fuck.

Lucky I’m even thinking about him about the car situation if not I would’ve been buying me and the kids a car small enough for us!

Avatar

7

Nursery lunches?

My daughter is nearly 10 months old and starting nursery next month. I want to send my daughter in with lunches so I know shes eating healthy meals but I'm honestly so lost as to what to put in her little bento lunch box that will keep till lunch time and doesnt need reheating. Ive been doing loads of baby led weaning at home, but I tend to make it fresh or pull stuff from the freezer I've previously made and defrost and reheat.
Could you show me some of the lunches you've been giving your baby? Or have you been been letting the nursery deal with the food?

Avatar

1

4

THIS DUMB 🍑 MF

LET ME BREAK IT DOWN 🤣🤣

THIS MAN DRIVES AN ELECTRIC CAR WHERE HE CAN PLUG HIMSELF IN (NORMALLY DOES TO DO DOORDASH ETC)
AND IT HAD A SPOT TO WIRELESSLY CHARGE
SOME HOW WITH 4 HOURS OF WORKING HE DIDN'T EVEN MAKE 20 BUCKS TO WASH CLOTHS ANOTHER RED FLAG

TWO NIGHTS AGO
HE CLAIMS TO GO OUT TO WORK. HANGS UP ON ME MID CONVERSATION 👀👀

4 HOURS PAST I'M GETTING SLEEPY STILL HAVEN'T HEARD FROM HIM
IT'S LIKE 1:30AM I TEXT HIM NIGHT I'M MAD CONFUSED ALMOST AN HOUR LATER I ANT HEARD FROM HIM SO I CHECK MY TEXT.
THE SHIT SAYS "PHONE OFFLINE" AND SHOWS THE TIME FRAME MY TEXT DIDN'T SEND
SO I START CALLING TO CONFIRM CAUSE I THOUGHT SOMETHING HAPPENED TO HIM. HE'S BEEN IN 2 CAR ACCIDENTS 👀 NEITHER HIS FAULT

SO I GET FRANTIC MY GUY

3:14 ROLLS AROUND I CALL AGAIN SURPRISE HE PICKS UP.
CLAIMS HIS PHONE DIED WHILE HE'S HANGING OUT AND HAVING A VERY "GOOD" CONVERSATION. HE WON'T TELL ME WHERE HE'S AT OR WHO WITH. MIND YOU THIS MAN CHEATED ON ME WHILE I WAS 33 WEEKS PREGNANT.

SO AT THIS POINT I'M PISSED OFF AND I TELL HIM I'M HANGING UP CAUSE I LOOK STUPID BEING WORRIED.

HE TURNS AROUND WHILE NOT BEING AROUND THIS CHICK AND FINALLY TELLS ME ALL THE DETAILS.

BTW YES WE MIGHT BE POLY BUT HE'S POSTED HIMSELF AS SOLO POLY WHILE LIVING WITH ME!! HE THINKS I'M. STUPID WITH ALSO THIS SNEAKY SHIT.

IF I WAS TO DO WHAT HE'S DOING HE'D LOOSE IT.
BUT I'M ABOUT TO GO OUTSIDE!! CAUSE YOU PLAYING IN MY FACE

Avatar

2

8

Resentment and placing blame on partner

Firstly, please don’t judge me - I’m aware all my thoughts aren’t rational and I do already feel badly about them

I’m finding myself becoming easily frustrated, annoyed, and placing a lot of blame on my partner for many things. Now I’d get it if he was rubbish but he’s not - he has the baby straight away when he gets home from work, he lets me get ready and shower before he goes to work, he pitches in with the chores and gives me any time I ask for off. He doesn’t go out loads either.

I do a lot of the mental labour - realising we need more of and purchasing clothes, milk, groceries, deciding dinner, cooking, cleaning, thinking about what baby needs, etc.

However I just find myself annoyed and blaming him for so many things I find difficult. I know this isn’t fair, but it’s almost like I’m angry that he’s finding it easy and I’m not. Angry if I’ve just got the baby to sleep and he doesn’t think and closes doors to loudly. Angry when he doesn’t dress baby warm enough, or when he puts him in a car seat with a coat on. When he forgets a blanket or doesn’t wash his hands and plays with him. When hes snoring and I’ve just got the baby to drift off.

We have had many conversations and he has tried to take loads off me but it never feels like enough for me to stop being annoyed with him.

Am I experiencing some sort of post partum mental health issues? I find myself upset and crying a lot. any advice would help.

Avatar

4

Read more on Peanut