My boyfriend is becoming a recluse
I have always been more outgoing than him but he was always up for stuff.
In recent YEARS it's got bad and now it's the point where me and him never have plans, either just us or as a family.
I have to suggest everything and if I don't book it or plan it then it won't happen. It's getting to me cos he earns a lot more than me and I can't afford the pay for the plans every time.
I mentioned a cool night out to him yesterday, it's in a few weeks and gives plenty of time for childcare to be arranged. He seemed a bit interested but never mentioned it again. I just mentioned it now and he ignored me.
He never comes out with my friends and their husbands/partners, he never attends parties or BBQs with them even though he's known them all for almost ten years and the guys do share some interests like football and F1.
His family have tried to organise a brunch for today and I said so shall we go? Seems a shame to miss it and he went "oh for god sake" and I asked what the matter was. He told me "I was going to fix the sink today".
The pipe is leaking, but it's surely not a full day repair š
It's getting me down now. My friends think he's a bit rude, so do my family and now he doesn't really want to see his own family. We have been out like 3 times together since our son was born over three years ago.
He had the opportunity to join me on a really good work trip last December and he didn't. My dad was fully pushing for it and offered complete childcare and yet her still didn't want to go.
He recently said he feels depressed at work and wants to leave. His work placd is really cool and vibrant and he admitted he's not that type of person, all he wants to do is go in, work and come home which is fair enough.
He has felt like this for ages, and I listen to him and we chat about it and make a plan about him getting another job but he never does anything about it. He would EASILY get another job as he's good at what he does. I've told him I would support him through this change.
It is making me really.frustrsted and tbh I am BORED. This has been ongoing for years. I think he is depressed but he is naturally quite reserved, it's never been this bad though. I want to help without seeming mean.
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I think he may need therapy to work through his anxiety and/or depression.
Following! I am in a pretty similar boat. It's very hard and I'm not sure what to do about it either. I stay home and would like to get out once a month as a family but often there's excuses. Either worry about how our 2 year old will behave/misbehave, or that there's too much that needs to be done. But then the things still don't get done and we stay cooped up all day waiting to do something that we won't get to do. We were supposed to get in one family walk a week and that lasted about 2 weeks this whole summer.
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