I feel like a shi**y mom

You’re not a shitty mom!!! You’re an amazing mom , you know how much comfort you are giving your little one as they go through some very tough development ? Naps are really hard for young babies and don’t really get easy for them until around 6 months. You’re helping your little one grow and saving your sanity. I nurse my baby to sleep for every nap and bedtime and hold her for her naps . She is 4 months old and I am starting to break the habit and put her in her crib , it’s hard but I know she will get it. You can’t spoil a baby ! Don’t listen to your partner !

Also I held my firstborn for every nap
Until 6 months and then we did sleeping training (taking cara babies) and he is a great sleeper !

You are not a bad mom!! Don’t let anyone tell you any different! At that age, it is perfectly acceptable and needed to be breastfeeding and comforting your baby!
They can start sleep training at 6months or older. But even then, with breastfeeding they will sometimes be hungry or need comfort when teething and transitioning.

Those reels are exactly why I am not on social media anymore. It’s so frustrating, also anything that happens before 8 weeks doesn’t matter at all. My baby used to sleep for so long in her bassinet before 8 weeks and put herself back to sleep when she woke up and then after 8 weeks I had to hold her for every nap.

I’ll tell you why this is bullshit and you don’t need to feel like a shitty mum.
A babies confidence and well being grows from how “secure” the attachment is with their primary care giver… attachment at this age is built through physical contact and good mothering. Everything that creates this bond you should do. (Which you are.)
And when your child grows they will be more confident and self assured because you have built this very strong attachment. You put the work in now that will save you a lot of work later.
I have 2 under 5s right now and the second one that’s almost 3 is far less confident because we didn’t have the same time when she was a baby to hold her all day. So she clings. You can see the difference it’s made. Whereas baby number one was a covid baby held all the time. By no one but me and daddy (you would think she would have been shy and stuff but nope) She’s bold as brass and sooooo confident.

Don’t listen to dad on this. I know sleep trained babies and you know what happens when they come out of the cot… they are nightmares.
Start sending him videos about secure attachment and he will have a less biased opinion. Cry it out sleep trained babies turn into insecure adults who internalise stress.
You know what you’re doing. Don’t let today’s warped society make you go against your motherly instincts. We been residing babies and cosleeping for millennia. Almost every mammal in the animal kingdom.

He's failing as a partner if he's making you feel that way.

My 14 month old naps and sleeps great now, but until 6 months he only contact napped and he nursed to sleep until close to a year. If its working for you then do it.

It's possible he is having a hard time with that, but taking it out on you isn't okay.